4 Simple Steps to Getting What You Want with Jake Herbert

4 Simple Steps to Getting What You Want with Jake Herbert

Jake Herbert is back on the show! He was an Olympic Wrestler whose life’s dream was to win the gold medal in the 2016 Olympics. My boys and I were there to see the trials. Sadly, his Olympic dream didn’t come true.

It was a crushing blow, but now Jake’s smiling. He’s got a baby on the way, a new career, and a mission to leave every room better than he found it. He talks about how he reinvented himself after the disappointment of a lifetime, and he shares his 4 ridiculously simple steps to getting what you want in life.

'Men have a hard time seeing the beautiful things that happen with failure.' – @Jakeherbert84 #failure #dads #men #fathers #motivation Click To Tweet

Jake’s story

Jake began listening to The Dad Edge podcast (The Good Dad Project at that time) when he became the father of a child from a previous marriage. He listened to a backlog of episodes and started his journey to becoming a better father. He decided to reach out to say thank you for the help and eventually came on the show to talk about How to Develop a Gold Medal Mindset.

Now Jake Herbert is a real estate coach who helps people see their maximum potential and creates a path to lead them there.

'When you lose and don’t get something you worked so hard for, it rips your heart out. And that’s beautiful.' – @Jakeherbert84 #failure #olympics #sports #wrestling #selfimprovement #personaldevelopment Click To Tweet

What You’ll Learn

  • How he coped after not getting a chance at his life dream, to win a gold medal
  • When he knew it was time to move on from his wrestling career
  • How he found a new path in life
  • The effectiveness of simplicity
  • His 4 simple steps to getting what you want
    • Identifying specifically what you want
    • Defining why you want it
    • Outlining 4 action items you will do this week to bring you closer to what you want
    • Scheduling exactly when you will take these action
  • The story of his famous mullet
  • The story of Buster Douglas’s fight against Mike Tyson and why it inspires him
  • How to intertwine your ‘how’ and your ‘why’
  • The domino effect of achieving small goals every week
  • Why you need to set your goals with somebody else
  • Why you have to take time to celebrate when you reach goals
  • Why your kids make great accountability partners
  • How people are motivated more by loss than by gain
  • The 3 Literacy’s that ensure success in life
    • Reading literacy
    • Physical literacy
    • Financial literacy
  • What Jake does when he gets overwhelmed
'Be a little bit better than you were yesterday. In time, you’ll be exactly where you should be and where you want.' – @Jakeherbert84 #motivation #goals #success #happiness #inspiration Click To Tweet

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How To Dream Big and Conquer Your ​Aspirations with Diamond Dallas Page​

Today on The Good Dad Project I talk to wrestling legend Diamond Dallas Page about his career, his new projects, and his tips on raising FOUR daughters!

DDP’s Career

For the few who don’t know about Diamond Dallas Page, he’s famous around the sports entertainment world of professional wrestling as “DDP.” His drive and ambition would lead him on an inspirational journey from being three-time world wrestling champion to his current endeavor of inspiring others to Own Your Life. DDP has developed his life-changing DDPYoga including books, audio cd’s and DVD workouts and is touring the country to promote his system.

Diamond Dallas Page dreamed of being a wrestler since he was a kid. He started practicing and entered a few matches, but abandoned his goal of becoming a wrestler when he began working in nightclubs and bars at the age of seventeen. Page loved the bar industry, especially all the perks he enjoyed as part of the scene. But when wrestling blew up, he felt he should have been part of it and deeply regretted giving up on his childhood dream.

One day, Page and his friend were having drinks in the back office of the bar he managed. He started riffing on ideas about a character named Diamond Dallas Page and his entourage of females called “Diamond Dolls.” Page wrote it all down just for fun. Little did he know that this seed of an idea would turn into his dream career.

Page began as a wrestling manager and ended up stealing the stage away from the wrestlers in the ring. He long thought he was too old to begin training to wrestle, but he couldn’t shake the dream. Eventually, DDP made the remarkable leap into professional wrestling at the age of 36.

Diamond Dallas Page, the former good guy of World Championship Wrestling “turned bad” continues to be one of the most recognized and respected superstars of professional wrestling. Also known as the “people’s champion,” his contagious popularity can be credited to his unshakable confidence and positive energy.

DDP As a Husband and Father

Back in Page’s days as a bar manager, one of his best bartenders was abandoned by the father of her two girls. They were left with a mortgage for a $400K home and nothing else. Page stepped in and took on the roll of the father and has looked after them ever since.

His other two daughters he had with his wife, Brenda. Brenda and the two girls now help Page with DDP Yoga and his other endeavors. He says the relationship they have together now is amazing.

Dad Wisdom for Raising Daughters

Diamond Dallas Page says that living in a household with 5 women was a challenge, and it’s hard not to get caught up in the drama. He suggests the following:

  1. Breathe. The most important technique DDP uses to diffuse a situation is deep breathing. When drama ensues and emotions run high, he coaches his girls in breathing for up to five minutes before actually beginning to discuss the problem.
  2. Mediate. He also would sit his daughters in a room and break the issue down. The reason for the fight is usually below the surface, and he would force them to communicate and be accountable for their behavior.
  3. Don’t yell. As a professional wrestler, DDP knows how hard it is to control your voice when you’re angry, but he says that once you start yelling and emotions get involved, you’re not hearing them anymore.
  4. Listen. Bite your tongue, shut your mouth, and listen to their side of the story.
  5. You can’t be their buddy all the time. It’s important to learn how to say no sometimes and tell them why you are saying no.
  6. You’re not always going to do it perfectly. Page says that nobody’s going to be a perfect dad. Don’t beat yourself up about making mistakes, but…
  7. Learn from your mistakes. You can’t keep making the same blunders and expect it to turn out differently. If something is isn’t working in your relationship with your daughter, try a new approach.


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Jim Harshaw on How to Achieve More Success Through Failure

Jim Harshaw believes failure, struggle and setbacks are not only an inevitable part of life but a necessary step on the path to success. Jim Harshaw has learned many life lessons on the wrestling mat. Having been a Division I All American and won three ACC Championships for the University of Virginia, trained at the Olympic Training Center and competed overseas for Team USA he has experienced significant triumph and devastating defeat. He relates those powerful lessons of failure, struggle and setback to empower his audiences to overcome their own challenges and achieve success despite their inevitable failures.

Fear and Failure

If you’re sensitive to harsh words, you may want to cover your eyes. Yeah, it’s a family show, but we’re going to talk about two “F” words. Ready? Here they come: Fear and Failure. Whew! That’s out of the way.

Success is Built on Failure

Jim Harshaw built his success on failures. As a matter of fact, he says each of his successes was built on failure. Early on, his failures, along with his successes, on the wrestling mat, gave him the foundation for the rest of his life. (He even goes on to say that Venture Capitalists in Silicon Valley, CA want to see someone with some type of failure in their background before backing someone.) That said, the life of a successful person is a grind and it’s full of failure.

It’s all about our Mentality when it comes to Failure

So many times, we sabotage our goals and dreams because we cripple ourselves with fear (the first “F” word). We’re afraid of failing (oops, the second “F” word), embarrassment, loss of respect, you name it. Maybe we don’t think successful people fail. Maybe we firmly believe that those who “make it” are just lucky and don’t struggle. Stop it. This is negative thinking. Actually, it’s the successful people who DO fail.

Successful People View Failure Differently

Not only do successful people know that failure will eventually lead to success, they surround themselves with what Jim calls an “environment of excellence.” This would be the people who support and push you forward, give you a confidence check when you need it (yes, we’ve heard this before from so many of our GDP guests!). It’s these people who will be there even when you do fail, so they can share your joy when you succeed.

The Proper Mindset

When this mindset is engrained in your own life, it is only natural that it should carry over to others-particularly, your children. Children have an incredible, innate ability to bounce back from failure early on: they fall down as toddlers trying to walk, get back up and try again. Somehow, though, this ability seems to falter as they grow in school, in sports, and anything else that takes risk. But if you, the parent, the guide, demonstrate through your own recovery from failure, that it is ok and even necessary to fail, your children will follow your lead. What better gift could we give our children than to learn that a great secret to success is mastering how to fail? See? The two “F” words aren’t that bad. When we learn that fearing failure isn’t necessary, and approach failure in a positive way, we are more apt to succeed.

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