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Health is Wealth with Shawn Tolleson

Shawn Tolleson

Shawn Tolleson is a husband, father, former baseball player, public speaker, and entrepreneur. He is the founder of Tolleson Health Advisors which is a company that uses a person’s biological process and creates a personalized plan for increasing their productivity and fulfillment.

Tolleson was a relief pitcher for the Los Angeles Dodgers and the Texas Rangers. Since his youth, Tolleson was raised to be a hard worker and to fulfill the purpose that God had for his life. When Shawn was in college, he discovered that he wanted to play baseball as a career. He started playing for the Dodgers as a pitcher and fell in love with the game.

In 2015, Shawn’s father was diagnosed with two forms of Stage 4 cancer. Since his passing, Shawn formed a passion for health and how health can affect one’s life. In 2020, he founded Tolleson Health Advisors and has had twenty clients since its launch.

One’s of Shawn’s greatest priorities in his morning routine. He stresses how much a morning routine can affect the whole rest of your day, whether it’s done right or wrong. Shawn’s mantra is that making small changes in your health can lead to astronomical changes in your life.

 

What You’ll Learn: 

[3:43]

Shawn recalls playing in the Major Leagues and how he misses that camaraderie amongst his teammates.

[10:17]

Shawn recalls trying to separate the game from his work and the difficulties that came along with that. He remembers setting strict boundaries in order to manage his time effectively.

[13:15]

Shawn recalls his childhood and how hard work was instilled in him at a young age. His dad always reminded him to be the very best he could be no matter what profession he did in life. God was at the focal point of his family.

[16:57]

Tolleson recalls becoming a believer at 15 years old. Being a faith-driven person helped him become a hard-worker. He worked hard because he wanted to make his family proud.

[18:15]

Shawn talks about how he helped his kids change their morning routine from unproductive habits to habits that will enable them to become better and more hardworking. The morning routine sets the tone for the whole day.

[21:20]

You have to make things fun for your kids. You have to show them that they can enjoy hard work and that you enjoy it too.

[28:14]

Shawn recalls when he first felt the push to turn baseball from a hobby into a career. His friend played for the Dodgers and convinced them to sign Shawn to play for them because of his work ethic and talent for the game.

[32:58]

Being an athlete made Shawn realize the importance of biology on health and how it’s important to eat and train like an athlete.

[34:10]

In 2015, during the last game of the season, Shawn found out that his father was diagnosed with 2 forms of Stage 4 cancer.

[35:42]

He decided he was going to do whatever it took to get his health and his father’s health back on track. He made simple changes in life to become the healthiest and happiest version of himself. His father was able to live another 4.5 years after his diagnosis.

[40:00]

Shawn’s father-in-law told him that he should pursue this health journey and Shawn made the decision to go all in. Since 2020, Shawn has had 20 clients with whom he has built his business, Tolleson Health Advisors.

[40:40]

The changes Shawn made to his life for his health were – he stopped working so hard, changed when he ate, began fasting,

[51:47]

Being alone is excellent for you, and you shouldn’t feel guilty about that. Just to be still will help you to slow down and listen to God.

[56:30]

Having other like-minded men in your life can help keep you accountable and become your support group.

RELATED EPISODES:

Healthy Habits for Marriage, Fatherhood, and Fitness

Creating a Family Culture of Connection

Drowning in Distraction? Optimize Your Morning Routine

 


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screen kids

Taking Your Kids Back from Their Screens with Arlene Pellicane


It has been extremely difficult during lockdown and virtual schooling to limit screen time for our kids. That is why we have Arlene Pellicane back on the show to talk about Screen Kids, the latest book she’s co-written with Gary Chapman.

Arlene Pellicane tells us what too much screen time will do to our kids’ brains. She explains us how the internet trains kids to become accustomed to instant gratification and how that affects their wellbeing and behavior over time. Most importantly, she teaches us how to set non-negotiable boundaries around computers and devices in our homes.

Learn how to keep screen time balanced for you and your kids once and for all in this episode!

 

Arlene Pellicane

If you didn’t get to listen to Arlene’s first show, The Cool, Calm, and Connected Family, click here. She is a speaker and author of several books including Parents Rising, 31 Days to Becoming a Happy Mom, and Calm, Cool and Connected: 5 Digital Habits for a More Balanced Life. Arlene has been featured on the Today Show, Fox & Friends, Focus on the Family, and FamilyLife Today. She’s the host of the Happy Home Podcast and regular contributor to Proverbs 31 Ministries.

Now she’s co-written Screen Kids and Grandparenting Screen Kids with Gary Chapman.

Arlene lives in San Diego with her husband James and their three children. You too can have a happy home – Arlene’s books will show you how.

Screen Kids: 5 Relational Skills Every Child Needs in a Tech-Driven World

Has Technology Taken Over Your Home?

In this digital age, children spend more time interacting with screens and less time playing outside, reading a book, or interacting with family. Though technology has its benefits, it also has its harms.

In Screen Kids Gary Chapman and Arlene Pellicane will empower you with the tools you need to make positive changes. Through stories, science, and wisdom, you’ll discover how to take back your home from an overdependence on screens. Plus, you’ll learn to teach the five A+ skills that every child needs to master: affection, appreciation, anger management, apology, and attention. Learn how to:

  • Protect and nurture your child’s growing brain
  • Establish simple boundaries that make a huge difference
  • Recognize the warning signs of gaming too much
  • Raise a child who won’t gauge success through social media
  • Teach your child to be safe online

This newly revised edition features the latest research and interactive assessments, so you can best confront the issues technology create in your home. Now is the time to equip your child with a healthy relationship with screens and an even healthier relationship with others.

What You’ll Learn

  • Your device is designed to be sticky. Everything is created on purpose so you and your child will check it frequently.
  • A bicycle is a tool that waits for you to use it. Tech is not. It keeps prompting you to pick it up.
  • You’re not a bad parent and your kid is not without self-control. But it’s up to you to empower yourself.
  • None of Arlene’s kids have smartphones. How does she do it?
  • Children want devices to be like everyone else.
  • Kids gauge their worth on how many followers and fans they have.
  • There is an increase of suicide, depression, and self-harm in kids. Followers are not friends. The relationships are not satisfying.
  • Boys can be exposed to porn.
  • Girls are exposed to social media that always makes them feel less-than.
  • There are workarounds to raising kids with no devices.
  • Every kid is different. Some kids can limit themselves and others can’t.
  • Parents must set separate rules for each child if necessary.
  • It’s okay to show kids that life can be unfair.
  • Teach your kids to use the phone for a purpose.
  • When wondering if your child should be online, ask yourself are youR kids consuming or creating? Is what they’re doing digital vegetable (learning, creating) or digital candy (passive consumption, gaming)?
  • Screen time reduces kids’ tolerance to waiting, and they are used to being entertained all the time.
  • There is a difference between watching movies together as a family and your kids watching what they want by themselves.
  • Dopamine can be overdone. That’s why kids who are amused by games all day are moody and unhappy.
  • When your kid plays a video game that triggers flight or flight, blood flow to the prefrontal cortex is reduced. The decision-making center for self-control is dark.
  • When kids are constantly in survival mode, they lose practice of the executive center of their brains.
  • Devices are too accessible. Location is the key to regulation.
    • Make barriers.
    • Collect phones at night.
    • Keep screens in common areas.
    • Delay giving your child a device for as long as you can.
    • Take a digital sabbath, one day completely screen free. If your kids freak out during 24 hours without WIFI, you know you have a problem

RELATED EPISODES:

The Cool, Calm, and Connected Family with Arlene Pellicane

Digital Minimalism with Cal Newport

Parents’ Guide to Video Game Addiction with Cam Adair

Love Languages and Other Marriage Tips for the Pandemic with Gary Chapman

 


Protect your kids with the Bark App

cyberbullying

sexual content

suicidal ideation

online predators


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digital distraction

How to Raise Indistractable Kids with Nir Eyal


Digital distraction is a critical problem for parents today. It seems like social media, tech, and video games are hijacking our kids’ lives, but what if the amount of time our kids spend on devices is a symptom of a much deeper issue?

Today we have Nir Eyal on The Dad Edge Podcast. He is a professor at Stanford’s Graduate School of Business and the author of international bestseller, Hooked—How to Build Habit-Forming Products. His upcoming book, Indistractable—How to Control Your Attention and Choose Your Life, is a guidebook for getting the best of tech without letting it get the best of us.

Nir Eyal knows better than anyone about how people get sucked into the rabbit hole of digital distraction, but what he’s going to tell us today will blow your mind. Listen as he outlines the psychology of distraction and how to address the true source of the problem so that kids don’t feel the need to overuse technology.

It’s not about what you’re doing, it’s if you planned to do it.—Nir Eyal

Nir Eyal

Nir Eyal became acutely aware of the problem of digital distraction after his daughter was born. He remembers some of her first words were, “iPad time! iPad time!” After many years helping companies make habit-forming products, he struggled with the idea of parenting in this age of distraction.

This drove him to research all he could find on the topic of distraction and technology. Nir was surprised to find out that the information propagated in the media did not align with the academic research. The tech companies weren’t the villains like most people thought. It was our own lack of “psychological nutrients.”

From then on, Nir’s mission was to learn and teach how to be an indistractable parent and raise indistractable kids.

What You’ll Learn

  • What makes a habit-forming technology?
  • The difference between a habit and an addiction
  • The “hook” business model: Trigger, action, reward, investment
  • How companies understand what makes you tick and click better than you know yourself
  • How to “hack back” and put tech in its place
  • The difference between traction and distraction
    • When an activity is aligned with your values, it’s traction
    • When it’s not, it’s distraction
  • The internal and external triggers that prompt us to take action
  • How all human motivation is geared to avoid discomfort
  • The root of all distraction: kids trying to avoid psychologically uncomfortable situations
  • How to give your kids the tools to fight distraction themselves
  • Why it’s not the tech’s fault that you or your kids are distracted
  • The 4 steps to become indistractable
    • Master internal triggers
    • Make time for traction
    • Hack back external triggers
    • Make pre-commitments to prevent distraction
  • Why we do things we know we shouldn’t do and avoid things that are in our best interest
  • The psychological nutrients children need for mental well-being: a sense of mastery, autonomy, and relatedness
  • If they don’t receive psychological nutrients in the real world, they will look for them in the virtual world
  • How video games give kids a sense of mastery
  • How free play is a record lows
  • The myth of the rebellious teenager
  • How free play with peers develop children’s sense of relatedness
  • How to set tech boundaries together with your kids
  • How to get kids to enforce their own rules around tech
  • Why you don’t just want to raise a rule follower, but a kid who can make the best decisions for themselves.
  • At what age kids should be allowed to go on social media
  • How to know if your kids are ready for certain to technology
  • How to prioritize kids’ time for free play with friends in the real world by teaming up with likeminded parents
  • How free play prevents anxiety and depression
  • Why parents have to walk the walk themselves
  • How we are sabotaging ourselves by blaming tech companies for taking over our brains


MENTIONED EPISODES

Digital Minimalism with Cal Newport

Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less with Greg McKeown

Parents’ Guide to Video Game Addiction with Cam Adair

 


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Nir Eyal’s Links

nirandfar.com

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Your Kids and Technology_

The Truth About Your Kids and Technology: Exclusive Dad Edge Alliance Q&A with Cal Newport


We’re just beginning to understand the impact of the internet and smartphones on society. Our time and attention are sucked away, and we look at a screen instead of our real lives. Energy for valuable activities is drained from us and we have nothing left for creative thinking. The long-term effects technology has on our kids’ wellbeing and development is even more alarming, leading to mental health issues and addictive behavior.

Today we have a fascinating conversation with our previous guest, Cal Newport, the author of Digital Minimalism. He joined our Dad Edge Alliance Mastermind to answer questions about:

  • The unknown effects of too much screen time on our kids
  • How the best way to shape the way kids use technology is to be an example
  • Why screen time is especially dangerous when used for escape
  • How to set practical boundaries around device use
  • How to use boredom to unlock creative juices
  • How to get kids on board with limiting device time
  • The disturbing effects of social media on teenage girls
  • Why multiplayer games are creating the worst addictions
  • How tech subverts our human drives
  • What to do when kids need tech for school work
  • How to teach kids to deploy tech for useful purposes, not entertainment and avoidance
  • What to do when your kids want to start their own social media audience, like a YouTube channel

RELATED EPISODES

Digital Minimalism with Cal Newport


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Digital Minimalism with Cal Newport


Today’s show is about distraction. Tech can be our best friend and worst enemy. Our devices are no longer normal telephones. They’ve become our constant companions. Texts, emails, social media and loads of content compete for our attention every hour of the day. We are more distracted and overwhelmed than ever before. It not only affects our work life but can do irreparable damage to our family life as well. Will our kids grow up missing their parents who are always on their phone?

Cal Newport is a bestselling author and the father of three boys. You won’t find him on any social media, because he doesn’t have any. He the author of six books, including, most recently, the New York Times bestseller, Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy World.

Cal is going to tells us how tech is engineered to keep us on our phones and steal time away from our lives. He also talks about how it affects our memory and anxiety levels. Cal teaches us what boundaries to set for screen time with our kids and gives us a 30-Day plan to step away from tech and rebuild our digital lives in a way that serves us.

Don’t waste another minute being distracted from the things that are most important to you.

If you demonstrate to your kids that you’re always on the phone, there is damage from that.

 

Cal Newport and Digital Minimalism

Minimalism is the art of knowing how much is just enough. Digital minimalism applies this idea to our personal technology. It’s the key to living a focused life in an increasingly noisy world.

Digital minimalists are all around us. They’re the calm, happy people who can hold long conversations without furtive glances at their phones. They can get lost in a good book, a woodworking project, or a leisurely morning run. They can have fun with friends and family without the obsessive urge to document the experience. They stay informed about the news of the day, but don’t feel overwhelmed by it. They don’t experience “fear of missing out” because they already know which activities provide them meaning and satisfaction.

Common sense tips, like turning off notifications, or occasional rituals like observing a digital sabbath, don’t go far enough in helping us take back control of our technological lives, and attempts to unplug completely are complicated by the demands of family, friends and work.

Cal Newport shows how digital minimalists are rethinking their relationship to social media, rediscovering the pleasures of the offline world, and reconnecting with their inner selves through regular periods of solitude. He then shares strategies for integrating these practices into your life, starting with a thirty-day “digital declutter” process that has already helped thousands feel less overwhelmed and more in control.

Technology is intrinsically neither good nor bad. The key is using it to support your goals and values, rather than letting it use you.

 

It was much more recently than we remember that we were reprogrammed into a relationship with our phone where we look at it all the time.

What You’ll Learn

  • The unintentional consequences of technology in the workplace, and the scarier and more impactful consequences to our personal lives
  • How the smartphone of today was not what Steve Jobs had intended
  • How today’s internet culture is the outcome of business model (Facebook) to reengineer apps so that people want to take their phone out of their pockets all the time.
  • How as our economy shifts toward knowledge work, one of the most important skills is to concentrate and any company who makes focus a priority will have the upper hand
  • Preserving and practicing the ability to concentrate
  • What constant screen time does to our memory
  • How screen time affects our ability to do spatial location
  • How it affects our ability to concentrate even when we’re not on the internet
  • How tech deprives us of insights and self-reflection
  • What it does to our anxiety levels
  • How solitude is a maintenance mode for our brain
  • How up until 10 years ago, we had many moments alone with our own thoughts
  • Your brain can always be processing info from other minds
  • Our hardware is not equipped to handle the constant processing of information from other minds
  • To extract insight from content for your own life, you need time to think about the information
  • How setting a 1 to 1 ratio of content intake to contemplation to extract 5X more value
  • Is there an ideal number of minutes per day of screen time?
  • Breaking the idea that the phone is what you do when you don’t have anything to do
  • The digital minimalism philosophy
  • Using tech only for big wins on what you really care about
  • Why maximalism is not a winning path
  • Why it’s much better to deal with the problem of your kid being mad for not being allowed to have a phone rather than him being up till 4am playing Fortnite
  • Why boys are more susceptible to game addiction
  • Why girls are more susceptible with social media, leading to self-harm and suicide
  • Why teenagers should not get cell phones
  • The “phone foyer” method
  • What can parents do when their kids will not get off the phone
  • Teaching kids how to build a good day instead of using the phone
  • Teaching them high friction activities, like mastering an instrument or sport
  • Cal Newport’s 30-Day Plan to digital minimalism
  • Examples of what kind of apps serve you and which do not
  • The leisure renaissance that makes it easier to participate in high quality activities
  • Simplest thing to do take all apps off the phone. Don’t save your passwords. Use your computer a designated time
  • Leaving a legacy, memories, experiences by putting the phones down
  • Cal Newport’s upcoming book, A World Without Email


MENTIONED EPISODES:

The Mask of Masculinity with Lewis Howes

Everything You Need to Know About Identity Theft with Barry Russel

 


Like the show? Leave an iTunes review.

If you’re enjoying the show, we encourage you to leave an itunes review.
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Cal Newports’s links

Website

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Resources

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Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

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