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Uncovering the Truth About Anger with Peter Sacco

Most men struggle with anger daily. Our tempers flare at work and at home with our wife and kids. Some of us are like Bruce Banner. Some of us turn into the Incredible Hulk. Canada’s psyche doctor, Peter Andrew Sacco tells us the secrets to where anger comes from, how to manage it, and so much more. You don’t want to skip this mind-blowing episode!

We are full-time workers, dads, and husbands. As men, it’s sometimes hard to control our anger. Discovering what type of temperament we have will help us find better ways to manage our anger, improve our relationships, and set an example for our kids on how to deal with their emotions too.

Peter Sacco

Peter Sacco, author of What’s Your Anger Type? is a psychology professor, a former private practitioner and is a regularly featured guest on television and radio. He is also an award-winning executive producer and has hosted many documentaries on relationships, psychological issues, and children’s issues. Peter Sacco has done extensive work in support groups and in anger management, especially with dads who are abusive towards kids and spouses.

Anger is a normal

Anger is a normal emotion. It’s how we deal with it that can be destructive.

Anger makes a person seem more authoritative and powerful, but the truth is that people with an anger problem actually feel they have no control in their lives. A lot of this aggression comes from unresolved issues in childhood and from shame or rage from being rejected as a kid.

Anger can be addictive

Anger is like a drug. When a person gets incensed, they experience an adrenaline rush. Being angry gives the sensation of dominance and control. It overpowers the fear that lies beneath it and gives a person a sense of power because it’s a stronger emotion than depression.

Is there hope for men with anger issues?

Some men who’ve come from a chaotic childhood feel doomed. They believe they’re broken and can’t be fixed. But Peter Sacco says there is tremendous hope for people with anger issues, but they have to do the work.

“You’ve got to want to be the change in your own life”

The Anger Cycle

Just like a soldier who has experienced PTSD, a person with a traumatic or abusive past might cope with unresolved emotions in different destructive ways. Some may use drugs and alcohol, some might vent their rage on certain races, others will withdraw or play the victim.

“Today’s catchers are tomorrow’s pitchers.”

A person who has anger issues will be more likely to take it on one his family. If your relationships fall apart and your work life is full of turmoil, the common denominator is you. It may be time to seek help.

Anger and bullying

Bullied kids lack self-esteem and confidence. They suffer from anxiety and depression. Some overcome it through counseling and become normal. Some cope by learning to be helpless and withdraw. Others develop a superiority complex and become bullies themselves, using aggression, rage, or passive aggression on others.

Why Kids are Suffering from Anxiety and Depression

Parents spend 2.5 to 6.5 minutes talking to their kids each day. In this small amount of time, the communication is usually corrective or punitive. It’s not at a deep intimate level because parents shy away from intimacy from their kids. ADHD has gone up. Divorce rates have risen. Peter Sacco believes it’s this lack of intimacy that’s more responsible than toxins in the environment or ingredients in food. Communication is the key.

Tips for improving communication with your kids

  1. How to start the conversation – If you feel uncomfortable speaking with your kids, find a situation where you’re most comfortable. Dinner is the best and most traditional forum for families to talk. Sit at the table. Make your kids accountable. Every day, ask them to give five things they’re grateful for. Then tell them to talk about one or two things they didn’t like. This will open up communication.
  2. Don’t start out questions with WHY – “Why” pushes someone in a corner. Be a facilitator, don’t treat kids as miniature adults. Don’t say why was your day bad? Say, if your day could go anyway you wanted, what would that be?
  3. Be more creative with questions – Do not be so direct. Maybe some things they’re facing will come out.
  4. Make yourself the go-to guy – Fathers are the breadwinners, and many feel that as long as they provide for their children, they’re doing their job as a parent. Most dads will plan adventures or bond over sports, but these activates focus on the event, not the father/child relationship. Dads should sit down with their kid and ask, “I’m Dad and you’re my child – let me ask you a question. What do I mean to you as a father? How do you see me? The all-knowing problem solver? Nagger? Coach? Disciplinarian? Teacher? How can I be a better dad?”
  5. How to talk about bullying – Kids won’t talk about being bullied because they’re afraid their parents will be ashamed of them. If you suspect bullying, don’t think that nothing’s happening and wait for it to go away on its own. It will wreck a child’s self-esteem. It’s crucial for kids to know that bullying happens in all walks of life. There is nothing to be ashamed of and that they can talk to you about it.

When Dads Get Angry

Even on our best days, our patience will run out. Peter Sacco says that the best way to communicate anger is to tell your kids you’re not feeling well. Tell them you just need a few moments. Instead of making it worse, treat anger like you have an upset stomach or like you’re going to vomit. You don’t want to talk about it. You want to be left alone. You’re not lying by saying you’re not feeling well because anger is a feeling. In a half hour, the emotions pass, and you’ll be in rational mindset to talk.



Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Peter Sacco’s Links

PeterSacco.com

BullyingisfortheBirds.com

Twitter

Facebook


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fulfilling life

10 Minutes a Day to a More Fulfilling Life

Finding the time for self-care is one of the hugest struggles for dads. We always have another task to complete. We’re always being asked for another favor. We feel guilty for taking time away from our family and we leave ourselves last on the list. We can be overcome by exhaustion, frustration, and depression. This is why establishing a self-care routine is crucial. Listen to how as little as ten minutes a day can lead to a happier, more fulfilling life.


We appreciate all the support!

If you’re enjoying the show, we encourage you to leave an itunes review. We read a review on the show every week, so don’t forget to sign your name.

Dad Edge Facebook Community

Have you joined the Dad Edge Facebook group? We have over 3,000 members from all over the world discussing what it means to be a dad, husband, entrepreneur, and how we can be the best versions of ourselves. Join us here!

RESOURCES

Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Check out our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Check out a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


 

 

eliminate negative emotions

How to Eliminate Negative Emotions by Targeting False Thoughts


Our thoughts and emotions can tear us down if we don’t know how to manage them. When waves of stress repeatedly hit us, our emotions can override our brains and take over our behavior, leading us to perform badly and make poor decisions. We may experience overwhelm or feel like our life is spinning out of control.

In this quick episode, I discuss the difference between an emotion and a thought, and how we can use the dynamic between emotions and thoughts to eliminate unnecessary stress, depression, anger, and overwhelm.


We appreciate all the support!

If you’re enjoying the show, we encourage you to leave an itunes review. We read a review on the show every week, so don’t forget to sign your name.

Dad Edge Facebook Community

Have you joined the Dad Edge Facebook group? We have over 3,000 members from all over the world discussing what it means to be a dad, husband, entrepreneur, and how we can be the best versions of ourselves. Join us here!

RESOURCES

Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Check out our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Check out a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


 

dads develop patience

3 Secrets for Dads to Develop Patience and Reduce Stress

Dads are pulled in a thousand different directions each day. We are constantly trying to meet the demands of our work and family life, and we seldom reach out for help. This leads to pressure and frustration. Today I list 3 secrets I use to develop patience and reduce stress.

In this episode I tell you how to enhance your patience by:

  1. Making self-care a priority.
  2. Identifying your core values and finding your purpose.
  3. Joining a community of like-minded men like the Dad Edge Facebook group.

 


We appreciate all the support!

If you’re enjoying the show, we encourage you to leave an itunes review. We read a review on the show every week, so don’t forget to sign your name.

Dad Edge Facebook Community

Have you joined the Dad Edge Facebook group? We have over 3,000 members from all over the world discussing what it means to be a dad, husband, entrepreneur, and how we can be the best versions of ourselves. Join us here!

RESOURCES

Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Check out our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Check out a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

 

downtime

Why Downtime is Essential

Downtime is essential, but often overlooked.  As dads we are usually trying to accomplish 100 things before the end of the day.  Who has time for downtime?

Relax. Breathe in, breathe out. Let stress melt from your body. Wait, you can’t relax, you have that work deadline you have to meet and it’s your turn to carpool to soccer and you promised your wife you’d take her to dinner. You’re so stressed out you feel like a hamster on a spinning wheel.

It probably seems like you wake up each morning just to make through the day to get home, go to bed then get up the next day and start all over. What you need is downtime. We’re not talking about going to the gym and having a killer workout, we’re talking about real downtime. Downtime that takes your mind off of everything and just lets you “be”.

Real Downtime

Read a book. No, not the books that help you be a better person (yes, they are important, but you are still working). The books that take your mind off of your responsibilities and transport you to a different place (remember your favorite books from childhood that would do just that?). This allows your mind and body to rest from stress and helps you recharge.

Take A Hike

A hike, not a run. Again, this is time for your mind and body to break from your usual stressful cycle, and even though running may be relaxing for some, it still puts stress on your body. Let’s face it, stress is stress and we don’t need more of it.

Meditate

It doesn’t need to be in the Lotus Position with candles lit everywhere (but we’re not frowning on this practice, either. To each his own), but just time out to reflect, pray, take your mind to a different place so it has a chance to replenish itself. Your mind works overtime as it is; giving it a meditative breather from time to time lets you get ready for the next life challenge.

Downtime is necessary to life. Of course, we’re not advocating extended downtime (you know, permanent couch potato syndrome), but enough to let your mind and body get ready for the next part of your life’s journey.

 

RESOURCES

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Check out our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Check out a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links