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Finding Your Inner Strength Through Adversity Comes from Within with Ben Newman

Ben Newman

Ben Newman is an author, public speaker, and financial advisor coach. He is famous for being the Mental Conditioning Coach for the Alabama Crimson Tide Football Team. Ben helps sales and sports teams around the world and specializes in mental toughness. He helps people build a stronger commitment to their purpose and process by educating them on building mental toughness. Taking ownership when you’re wrong is the first step to maturity. It allows you to look past your pride and admit that you messed up and that you want to make it right. Taking ownership also means figuring out what you want to do in or with your life and OWNING it.

Finding strength in adversity comes from within. It happens when you’re at the end of your rope, when you feel the most hopeless. You have a choice to make. Do you want to give up, or do you want to find your inner strength and push forward? 

Lastly, taking action. Taking action occurs when you least WANT to. It happens when you’re tired, and you don’t feel like doing anything, or you can’t find the motivation. After taking action, you begin to feel better and wonder what the big fuss was all about. This is the first step to CHANGE. 

What You’ll Learn: 

[4:20]

Ben talks about his childhood. He recalls how he had to grow up fast during his youth. His mother passed 11 days before his 8th birthday.

[9:17]

Ben recalls how he processed his mom’s death. He recalls being angry as a way to deal with the event.

[11:23]

Newman recalls the love he felt from the motherly figures in his life that gave him that connection he was missing.

[13:44]

Ben remembers how it was living with his father during his youth. He learned what it meant to work, and take care of himself.

[15:48]

Newman talks about basketball being the outlet of choice for him.

[19:07]

Ben recalls his post-performance talks with his dad.

[22:00]

Ben shares his hypothetical response toward his son if his son came to him, and said he didn’t want to play basketball anymore.

[26:04]

Ben gives advice for any parent that struggles to let their kids come to them first about sports, instead of using the harsh, yelling method.

[31:45]

Ben talks about his current relationship with his father.

[32:30]

Ben recalls the events during his teenage years, and how he dealt with not having a mother in his life.

[36:44]

Newman talks about how he came about to the work he does currently.

[40:53]

Ben talks about his life coach, and how his coach has helped him. His exposure to coaches led him to his current career.

[42:19]

We have 100% control over our mindset.

[47:08]

Ben talks about his high points over the course of his career.

[55:07]

Ben recalls how he keeps his marriage alive.

[58:59]

Ben talks about what it means to live legendary.

[1:02:14]

Ben talks about what he would hypothetically say to his mom if he were to have dinner with her one night.

[1:05:33]

Newman hypothetically talks about what his family would talk about around the dinner table in 30 years.

RELATED EPISODES:

How Overcoming Adversity Can Make You a Better Dad with Nick Dinardo

Weird & Wonderful Ways to Build Mental Resilience with Ben Aldridge

Finding the Strength Through the Struggle


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Ben Newman

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Living Your Most Authentic Self as a Husband, Father, and Business Owner with Scott Holman

Scott Holman

Scott Holman is a husband, father, business owner, and founder of the program Stop Clowning Around. Scott’s day job is the Director of Sales for national accounts for a very large security company. Scott’s organization, Stop Clowning Around, is about developing human beings into a level of mastery. He has also recently taken on two properties that he has flipped for financial investment.

Scott’s number one asset that he pushes is learning how to view things from someone else’s perspective. Perspective drives everything in life, especially our interactions. Everyone has a different set of lenses they see the world through, and we can’t change that. You will be much better as a person and as a business leader if you learn to look at things from someone else’s perspective.

Another thing that Scott practices regularly with his wife and children is communication. Communication is key to healthy marriage, along with being each other’s best friend. Communication and time are the key to raising your children to be strong men and women. Being there for your wife and kids, and not telling them how to do things or “fix it” for them is the driving factor in successful relationships.

Asking someone a series of questions that will lead them down the path of discovery is much better than fixing the problem for them. Most people don’t need us to tell them that we’re doing something wrong, they need us to walk the path with them and allow themselves to vocalize it, so they can take the action step at the end. This means, being intentional and allowing yourself to sit and listen, when you’d rather take control of the situation.

As men, we are the leaders and masters of 3 areas – ourselves, our families, and our businesses. In order to live legendary, we have to understand that life is always about the journey of mastery. It isn’t about the destination of mastery, and never having to learn. We are constantly learning along the journey, and that’s how we become legendary!

What You’ll Learn: 

[3:10]

Scott talks about how Monday’s are the best days, right after Friday’s because you don’t need to wait for a fresh start.

[4:32]

Scott talks about how he shifted his mindset about Monday’s.

[6:31]

Scott talks about his family and how he has one set of biological children, and another set of adopted biracial children. He has been married to his wife for over 24 years.

[9:22]

Scott talks about how he has been able to have such a successful marriage.

[11:42]

Scott talks about how his kids to be strong confident men and women.

[16:09]

Scott talks about how he has been successful with changing his perspective when he communicates with his wife.

[21:55]

Scott recalls the things that will be different in his marriage from now until his 25th year of marriage.

[24:18]

Scott talks about all of his current projects.

[28:01]

Scott talks about the secret behind his success.

[33:20]

Scott talks about what it means to live legendary.

[37:07]

Scott thinks about what his family would be talking about if they were to all sit around the table 25 years from now.

[39:12]

Scott talks about Stop Clowning Around.

[42:36]

Scott talks about what things have been happening in his life the past year.

[46:13]

Scott talks about the vision for his brand for the next 12 months.

RELATED EPISODES:

Living Your Authentic Life

Parenting with Leadership with Stewart Friedman and Alyssa Westring

Communication with Your Wife: What You’re Missing


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Scott Holman

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Inadequacy, Insecurity, and Imposter Syndrome

Inadequacy, Insecurity, and Imposter Syndrome with Mike Kitko


Do you feel the need to be perfect, and at the same time, think you’ll never be good enough? As a man, husband, and father, are you plagued by deep-rooted feelings of insecurity and inadequacy, leaving you terrified that people will find out you have no idea what you’re doing? That’s your imposter in charge and he’s preventing you from living as who you really are.

Mike Kitko is an Executive Self-Mastery Coach, speaker, and author. After a colossal career and personal meltdown, he found his true purpose—inspiring leaders to find the power in their authenticity, purpose, and passion.

Today, Mike Kitko talks about how inadequacy, insecurity, and imposter syndrome ruled his life. He teaches us how to cultivate self-awareness and diffuse the imposter before it sabotages us. He also tells us how to stop running from fear and start chasing our purpose so we can provide a loving, safe, and prosperous environment for our families.

Do you suffer from imposter syndrome? How do you defeat the imposter in charge? Find out in this episode!

Mike Kitko

A Marine with an MBA, Mike has decades of experience in leadership roles for Fortune 500 companies, yet he always felt like an imposter. His outward persona was one of strength and wealth, yet he struggled internally with self-confidence and self-fulfillment. His inability to understand his emotions led him to alcoholism, uncontrolled anger, and ballistic rage. He abused his marriage, family, professional career, and health.

Through coaching, intense study, and deep work, Mike learned to embrace self-doubt and care for his body, mind, emotions, and soul with self-mastery. Now Mikes overflowing energy, clarity, and love inspires souls. With an infectious zest for life, internal power, and inward confidence that matches how people perceive him externally, Mike has turned his life around. And he wants to help you to do the same.

If you can’t feel it, you can’t heal it, and if you can’t heal it, you can’t be you.—Mike Kitko

The Imposter in Charge

Life’s good, right? You’ve got the high-paying job, the car, the home, the family–so why do you feel so incomplete?

Maybe your ego is bursting at the seams and you can’t show yourself for who you really are. Perhaps you have no boundaries and you pour yourself into others–their problems, their pressures, their pleasures–at the expense of yourself and your own family. You might think you need to be perfect but are acutely aware that you’re not good enough. Could it be that deep-down you feel inadequate, incapable, and like a fraud?

You don’t have to live like that. The Imposter in Charge is the vulnerable and raw account of Mike Kitko’s journey from being an overweight, overstressed, overachieving alcoholic business executive who was on the brink of divorce, to a life of authenticity, courage, confidence, and clarity. This transparent account offers a then-to-now experience, as well as practical applications and practices to help you break out of the imposter syndrome yourself–once and for all.

What You’ll Learn

  • Men learn from a very young age to not be real, vulnerable, and or have emotions.
  • When we wear a mask and shrink, we can’t really feel human.
  • What it means when everything you thought would bring you happiness doesn’t.
  • How the world loves you exactly the way you are. When you realize that, things start to change
  • Mike used to be over 300 pounds and an alcoholic.
  • When Mike figured out that he had nothing figured out
  • When Mike quit drinking, he lost who he thought were friends, but then real people showed up.
  • How Mike made the bold move to leave his corporate job and create his coaching business.
  • How he fell head over heels in love with his wife again after their marriage was nearly destroyed.
  • Perfection is impossible
  • Emotions are going to make us behave badly.
  • Accept that on the journey of improvement, you’re going to stumble,
  • Why you must surrender to the natural feeling of inadequacy and insecurity.
  • What is a critical purpose decision?
  • 90% of people are running away from fear. 10% are chasing purpose.
  • We’re not here to survive, play small, provide and buy more stuff.
  • You don’t have to sacrifice yourself to have a lucrative business.
  • Your desires are your gateway to understanding what purpose you serve.
  • How men can find their true purpose and make sure they’re not chasing someone else’s purpose.
  • Lack of self-awareness drives the imposter syndrome.
  • The importance of knowing your talents and weaknesses.
  • Getting and staying in your “zone of genius” as much as possible
  • Clarity is a creative force.
  • His mission is to move men from survivorship to leadership
    • Yourself
    • Society
    • Family
  • We can’t provide a safe prosperous loving environment for our families if we are not living authentically.
  • Love = Letting Others Voluntarily Evolve
  • How we’re inadvertently telling our kids their choices aren’t good enough.
  • We’re not here to help our kids avoid mistakes, but to help them make choices after they understand the consequences.

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