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Everything MEN NEED to KNOW About PORN

Everything Men Need to Know About Porn with J.K. Emezi

Today our show is about porn, sex, and masturbation addiction. This subject constantly comes up in The Dad Edge community and our episodes about pornography have massive downloads. In this age where we can watch it anytime and anywhere on our phone, it is becoming a huge problem. This crucial, controversial topic is not discussed enough because of the taboo, but porn addiction is real and we need answers.

J.K. Emezi is a sex and porn addiction coach for the last 9 years and is the founder of Elevated Recovery, where he helps men overcome sexually compulsive disorders. He tells us everything men need to know about porn—how it changes our brains, affects our relationships, and alters our perspectives. He gets real about how to tell if porn is a problem and what to do about it. He also tells us how we can prepare our kids for their inevitable encounter with porn, which is happening at startlingly earlier ages.

Pornography changes your values as a man.—J.K. Emezi

 

The Porn Addiction Problem

When it comes to internet porn, we have no idea what we’re up against. In the olden days, porn was hard to get. It was in the magazine rack behind the counter or the back room of a video store. Now it is available at anytime of day, in any place, at the tip of our fingers. J.K. Emezi says the most common place men watch pornography is at work.

The most disturbing thing about internet porn is that our kids are being exposed to it before they understand what they are looking at. In decades past, kids may not have run into porn until their teens, but in 2016, 11 was the average age of a child’s first exposure. Now, the age is 8.

J.K. Emezi had his own struggle with pornography and discovered that many of the men he worked with did too. Forums were filled with men who were seeking help, but there weren’t any resources. J.K. first began blogging anonymously about recovering from his porn addiction, but he eventually came out into the open to help others end their out-of-control behavior with porn, sex and masturbation.

What You’ll Learn

  • J.K. Emezi’s background as a bible salesman
  • Where and when the porn problem begins
  • How parents are getting too lax with computers and devices
  • How there is actually Minecraft porn now
  • Why one talk with your kids about porn is not enough. It must be randomly brought up from time to time.
  • Why porn is just as bad as drugs or alcohol
  • When porn is okay
  • Why men watch porn, especially at work
  • The role of brain chemicals in porn addiction
  • How to rewire your brain for monogamy
  • How to reconnect and become aroused again by your partner
  • How porn addiction, little by little, destroys your values
  • Why some women view porn as cheating and suffer ‘betrayal trauma’
  • How to define a compulsive sexual behavior
  • If, when, and how to disclose a porn problem to your spouse
  • Why masturbation is normal, but porn is not
  • What can men do when their wife is pregnant or has just given birth and can’t have sex
  • Why watching unrealistic bodies is unfair to your wife
  • How to use a rubber band to snap out of physical urges
  • How to anchor yourself in the morning to stick to your recovery goals
  • How to clean up your online environment to avoid triggers
  • How to interrupt porn urges by journaling and visualization
  • Advice for men in sexless marriages

 

MENTIONED EPISODES:

Porn – Why We Watch It, When It’s a Problem, and How to Stop with Nell Daly

Porn Addiction and Affair Recovery Mentoring

How to Talk to Your Kids About Pornography with Kristen Jenson

Video Game, Porn, and Social Media Addiction with Cam Adair


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J.K. Emezi’s Links

elevatedrecovery.org

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Instagram

Youtube

Twitter

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How to Talk to Your Kids About Pornography

How to Talk to Your Kids About Pornography with Kristen Jenson


Kristen Jenson is the author of Good Pictures Bad Pictures: Porn-Proofing Today’s Young Kids. In this show, she tells us how to initiate a healthy conversation with our kids about pornography according to age group. She also gives a 1, 2, 3 action plan for kids so they know what to do if they see pornography.

Kristen explains the brain science behind pornography addiction and how it warps the mind. She also explains how it can lead to relationship problems and even erectile dysfunction.

This is a scary topic, but it’s up to parents to start the conversation as early as possible before kids get the wrong ideas about sex and intimacy from the internet. Save this episode!

'If you want your kids to have a healthy view of sex and intimacy, then you have to step it up and have these conversations at a young a before they see it on the internet.' – @ProtectYM #kids #children #parenting #pornaddiction Click To Tweet

Kristen Jenson

Kristen Jenson never planned on writing a book about pornography until she met the mother of a large family who was doing her best to raise her kids with healthy values. Then the woman discovered her 17-year-old son molested all of his siblings, from the ages of 14 to 4. He had been into pornography.

Pornography has never been more accessible. Now, all that’s needed is an internet connection to see anything and everything that is out there. Our kids are on electronics devices all the time and even if we have filters in place, we cannot control what they see outside the home.

Child-on-child sexual abuse and porn addiction numbers are rising. After Kristen saw this problem affecting so many kids, she researched to see what books were available on the topic. She couldn’t find any. This compelled her to do something about it. Her first book has been a bestseller on Amazon for the better part of three years.

'If you become their wiling expert on sex, they’re going to go to you.' – Kristen Jenson #sex #sexed #kids #children #parenting #dads #fathers Click To Tweet

What You’ll Learn

  • How using a book is an easier way to jump into the subject of pornography with your kids
  • Other ways to segue into conversations about sex and pornography
  • Why it’s easier to talk about pornography with your kids when they are younger
  • The common denominator of all porn addicts
  • How you are competing with the porn industry in the sex education of your child
  • What to do if you don’t know how to answer a question about pornography
  • How to keep your kids from sharing things they learn about sex and pornography with friends or younger siblings
  • How much detail to give about sex and pornography
  • Why it’s important to explain that sex is more than just for reproduction
  • How porn acts like a drug on the brain
  • Why people who use porn are less satisfied in their marriage and are more likely to be unfaithful
  • How porn can lead to erectile dysfunction
  • The difference between the thinking brain and the feeling brain
  • Why you should be wary of allowing your children to have their own devices
  • Resources for parents on how to protect your kids
'If you wait till your kids come to talk to you (about sex and pornography), you put a huge burden on them.' – Kristen Jenson #kids #children #communication #parents #parentingtips #family Click To Tweet

We appreciate all the support!

If you’re enjoying the show, we encourage you to leave an itunes review.


Kristen Jenson’s Links

Website

Facebook

Twitter

Instagram

Good Pictures Bad Pictures: Porn-Proofing Today’s Young Kids

Good Pictures Bad Pictures Jr.: A Simple Plan to Protect Young Minds


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