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How to Fix Your Marriage

How to Fix Your Unhappy Marriage with Seth and Melanie Studley

Why is it so hard to make a marriage work? And is it too late to fix your unhappy marriage?

If you’re struggling in your marriage, you’re not alone. About 50% of marriages end in divorce, but staying in a toxic marriage can be even worse.

Today we have husband and wife team Seth and Melanie Studley on the show. They are the creators of the Anatomy of Marriage podcast and app, and they coach couples back to sane and happy marriages.

It’s hard to believe that not long ago, Seth and Melanie’s marriage was a complete train wreck. How did they fix their impossible marriage?

The Studley’s talk about how taking personal accountability and extreme ownership is the first step to healing a relationship. They reveal how escaping with porn, alcohol, or other distractions is not the issue, but the symptom of an underlying complication that’s not being addressed. They also explain how to finally stop fighting and start solving problems.

Don’t waste another day being miserable and frustrated. Start fixing your unhappy marriage right now!

The Anatomy of Marriage

A great marriage is built little-by-little over time. AOM Radio is a fun and engaging daily show that will help you create a fulfilling, sexy, fun and life-giving marriage. And hey, it’s cheaper than marriage counseling!

No one person has the answers for every marriage, that is why Seth and Melanie Studley bring on amazing guests and have REAL CONVERSATIONS about sex, money, kids, marriage counseling, relationships, and so much more!

Seth and Melanie believe that marriage help shouldn’t be boring so we created the Anatomy Of Marriage App, the Couples Counseling App that’s fast, fun and NEVER BORING! Better relationships in the blink of an eye and WAY CHEAPER then marriage counseling!

Download the Anatomy of Marriage app.
Use promocode Dadedge.

What You’ll Learn

  • Stop the blame. What would it look like to put your ego aside and be open to a growth mindset toward your marriage?
  • We take the easiest path to not feeling discomfort to mask something that needs to be resolved.
  • Porn is a common coping mechanism because it’s an instant state change.
  • When we habitually use porn to escape, we create worn pathways that are hard to get out of.
  • Contrary to popular belief, women also have porn issues.
  • Does porn equal infidelity to women?
  • Good sex is about connection and pleasure. Pornography bypasses the connection part.
  • Our sexual needs don’t get met because we are usually not honest in sexual conversations.
  • Unresolved issues always come up in uglier ways the longer they’re ignored.
  • If we minimize the problem, hold it in, and try to white-knuckle through, it will only get worse.
  • Things change in a couples’ sex life over time. Expect it to evolve as you start a family and grow through different stages in life. Understand your spouse will not be the same sexually as she was when you first met.
  • The most common issue in couples is communication.
  • Couples think that if they keep fighting, they will resolve the issue, but they’re usually not even arguing over the same thing.
  • Couples end up fighting about how they fight and not about the issue.
  • Personal accountability and extreme ownership–We put all the weight on our spouse. You’ve got to take care of your own crap.
  • Take responsibility for yourself. What kind of man, husband, father will you be regardless of how your wife behaves?
  • When you have kids, you’re now the adult. You have to act like one. How we treat our spouses is how our kids will treat their spouses.
  • Family is the university of our relationships. This is where we learn relationship habits.
  • If your family was dysfunctional, make yours a new family. Create your own family origin story for your kids and establish a new set of healthy values.
  • Get out of our own way. Stop complaining your way out of growing and becoming strong.
  • A happier relationship is possible for you. It’s there if you’re willing to let go of BS you’ve learned. No porn will stand up to the experience of a fulfilling marriage.
  • Look at your spouse as a teammate. Collaborate. Discuss every play that will come up in the game.
  • Kick resistance’s ass every day.
  • About the Anatomy of Marriage App—Quick, not boring, and includes games like Battlestrip!

Download the Anatomy of Marriage app.
Use promocode Dadedge.

MENTIONED EPISODES:

The Anatomy of Marriage Part 1: The Woman’s Side

The Anatomy of Marriage Part 2: The Man’s Side

Reclaiming Your Sovereignty with Ryan Michler


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Our biggest regrets in life happen
when we’ve lost our patience. 

how to have more patience

Stop Reacting and Start Living

Do the work. Make a plan. Follow along with simple, yet powerful exercises and tap into the patience that is within you.

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Seth and Melanie Studley’s Links

anatomyofmarriage.com

Podcast

Facebook

Instagram

YouTube

coaching@anatomyofmarriage.com

ANATOMY OF MARRIAGE APP (Use promocode Dadedge)

Resources

Fill out an application for The Dad Edge Alliance

The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

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battling porn and sexual addiction

Going Deeper: Battling Porn and Sexual Addiction with Eddie Capparucci


Pornography has never been so unbelievably accessible, but what starts out innocently enough can eventually take over our lives. We know this is a huge issue for men today because our episodes on battling porn and sexual addiction top the charts.

Today we talk to an expert who has an approach to porn and sexual addiction that you haven’t heard before.

Eddie Capparucci is licensed counselor and the author of Going Deeper: How the Inner Child Impacts Your Sexual Addiction. He tells us how men’s struggle with porn is linked to how we dealt with pain in our childhood. He reveals why too much porn can ruin our sex lives psychologically as well as physiologically. Eddie also gives us a step-by-step example of how casual porn consumption can descend into the destruction of a family.

Kids are being exposed to sexual content as young as 8 years old. Whether you are struggling with an addiction to pornography or not, this is a show every father needs to listen to.

Eddie Capparucci

Eddie Capparucci, LPC, CSAS, CPCS, specializes in treating sexual and pornography addictions. Among his many clients, Eddie has worked with professional athletes including NFL and MLB players and television personalities. He also serves as the clinical director for the National Decency Coalition, an organization working with state governments to help limit the access of pornography to minors.

In addition to being a prominent sexual and pornography addiction therapist, he has spoken to numerous organizations regarding the harmful impact pornography has on individuals, relationships, and society.

Going Deeper: How the Inner Child Impacts Your Sexual Addiction

If you have been battling a sex/porn addiction you understand how frustrating it can be to fail time and time again. This book provides a new and proven treatment method that will empower you to take control and finally manage your addiction. The key is understanding the road to recovery from a sex/porn addiction goes through your childhood. Why? Because it’s your inner child who is running the show. The Inner Child Recovery Process has proven successful with a large majority of clients in my counseling practice. It has changed the lives of many individuals who felt helpless and hopeless due to their addiction. And it can do the same for you. Endorsed by many leaders in the sex/porn addiction field, the Inner Child Recovery Process is a game changer and can be the solution you have been seeking when it comes to breaking free from your sex and porn addictions.

What You’ll Learn

  • Porn addiction really has nothing to do with sex or a lack of sex.
  • Eddie talks about his traumatic childhood and how he turned to sex and pornography.
  • He destroyed two marriages and left a trail of broken hearts.
  • What is attachment disorder and how does it affect our sexual relationships?
  • Most men he deals with lack emotional intelligence, which means they cannot tell what feelings they’re experiencing.
  • As men, when we learn to attach and bond with true intimacy, we don’t need the sexual stimulation and validation from pornography.
  • Being vulnerable is a skillset that boys aren’t taught.
  • We need to let our kids to feel emotional pain.
  • The road to recovery from pornography or any kind of sexual addiction goes back to childhood.
  • Negative events connect us to pain from the past.
  • We need to learn to identify core triggers.
  • The nine child-types, their different pain points, and accompanying triggers.
  • The dangerous mindset that you’re not hurting anybody when you consume pornography.
  • Porn from a young age is teaching boys that it’s okay to objectify little girls.
  • Girls get the message it’s okay to be objectified.
  • With regular porn use, a man will lose interest in his wife. He will find her less attractive and less sexually satisfying. He’ll look for more than she’s willing to give.
  • In almost 50% of men, pornography escalates into darker territory. The brain builds a tolerance and needs more extreme stimulation.
  • Men start to withdraw and distance themselves from family.
  • Physically, chronic masturbation has an effect on erection and ability to ejaculate.
  • How to recover from porn and sexual addiction:
    • Get some accountability.
    • Surround yourself in community
    • Own it. Fess up, at least to yourself
    • Sit down with someone to find out why you do it in the first place.
  • Advice to men when they are triggered to use porn
  • The disorder will not go away. Take action and learn to manage it.

RELATED EPISODES:

Everything Men Need to Know About Porn with J.K. Emezi

How to Talk to Your Kids About Pornography with Kristen Jenson

Porn – Why We Watch It, When It’s a Problem, and How to Stop with Nell Daly


Protect your kids with the Bark App

cyberbullying

sexual content

suicidal ideation

online predators


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If you’re enjoying the show, leave us an itunes reviewIf your review is chosen as the iTunes Review-of-the Week, we’ll send you the free book of your choice!

What to do: send an email to support@gooddadproject.com notifying us about your review, your mailing address, and your choice of a guest book from our Books Page!

Thanks for the support!

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Eddie Capparucci’s Links

innerchild-sexaddiction.com

Facebook

Twitter

Amazon

Resources

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The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

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FREE chapter from THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE

FREE EBOOK: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

FREE EBOOK:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Follow The Dad Edge


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5 Practices to Make You a Mentally Tougher Man with Dominick Quartuccio

5 Practices to Make You a Mentally Tougher Man with Dominick Quartuccio

The only thing we can count on in life is change, and that means having the mental toughness for life’s challenges. We don’t want to spend our entire lives reacting out of fear and frustration. We want to know that no matter what happens, we can handle anything.

Dominick Quartuccio returns to The Dad Edge. He is a speaker, coach, and the author of Design Your Future: 3 Simple Steps to Stop Drifting and Take Command of Your Life. He is going to share 5 practices to make you a mentally tougher man so you can train your body and mind to operate from a place of power, presence, and resourcefulness.

Get ready to work out your mental toughness muscles!

Dominick Quartuccio

Dominick Quartuccio is a keynote speaker, trainer and executive mentor. He’s dedicated his life to helping the best-of-the-best accelerate individual and team performance. He’s the author of Design Your Future: Stop Drifting and Start Living.

Drawing upon 15 years of experience as an executive for Fortune 100 financial services firms, Dominick saw the demands on leaders go up every year, forcing those leaders to sacrifice the most important areas of their lives: personal health, personal relationships and personal freedoms.

That model is broken. The consequences to leaders, their families and their businesses are unsustainable.

Dominick offers a new way. He works with high performance individuals, teams and businesses (small and large) to accelerate them to the next-level by aligning the most important areas of work and life. Dominick is a student of life, constantly disrupting himself in pursuit of raising performance and living a definiteness of purpose.

What You’ll Learn

  • Most men wildly overestimate their mental toughness.
  • Men think they are handling a situation, but they are collapsing in some way.
  • When men are triggered by a stressful situation, they divert their emotions with porn, fantasy, food, drugs, alcohol, isolation, avoidance, and overworking. Either that, or they shoulder everything and let it kill them in the process.
  • Dom’s addiction to sex and porn lead him to cheating on the only woman he ever loved.
  • By building mental and emotional capacity, the breadth of what you can endure increases and their are few situations you cannot handle from a place of power, presence, and resourcefulness.
  • How to be disciplined about how much pornography you consume
  • 5 Practices to Make You a Mentally Tougher Man
    1. The Breath Hold Challenge – Hold your breath as long as you can. Wait till you start to feel your fight or flight response to kick in. Try to assume a place of stillness despite your chaotic thoughts.
    2. The Cold Shower Challenge – Most of us can’t anticipate or get past the initial shock of an uncomfortable situation. Train yourself to brace for the blast with a cold shower. Breathe into it and wait for the shock to pass.
    3. The 100 Push Up Challenge – Try to do 100 consecutive push ups with your only relief being able to take a break in plank before continuing. This changes your relationship with pain, allowing you to look at it and disassociate from it.
    4. The Meditation Challenge – This long form stillness builds your endurance for pain. Sit and meditate without moving. Watch your feelings without judgement.
    5. Temporary Abstinence – What are the things you crave? What habits do you lean on to get through the day? Junk food, porn, Netflix, alcohol? Removing the crutch quickly illuminates why it was there in the first place. Then you can work on the source of the craving and reintroduce these elements in a healthier way.


MENTIONED EPISODES:

A Good Dad Masters These 5 Life Skills – Larry Hagner on A Man Amongst Men

Get Lit: Forget the Pressure to Find Your Why with Dominick Quartuccio

Stop Drifting and Consciously Design Your Future with Dominick Quartuccio

The Secrets to Achieving Wildly Important Goals with Mark Divine

What Doesn’t Kill Us with Scott Carney


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The next one might be yours!

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Dominick Quartuccio’s Links

DOM’S FREE DOWNLOADS

Man Amongst Men Podcast

Instagram

Amazon

Resources

Fill out an application for The Dad Edge Alliance

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

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Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


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Everything MEN NEED to KNOW About PORN

Everything Men Need to Know About Porn with J.K. Emezi

Today our show is about porn, sex, and masturbation addiction. This subject constantly comes up in The Dad Edge community and our episodes about pornography have massive downloads. In this age where we can watch it anytime and anywhere on our phone, it is becoming a huge problem. This crucial, controversial topic is not discussed enough because of the taboo, but porn addiction is real and we need answers.

J.K. Emezi is a sex and porn addiction coach for the last 9 years and is the founder of Elevated Recovery, where he helps men overcome sexually compulsive disorders. He tells us everything men need to know about porn—how it changes our brains, affects our relationships, and alters our perspectives. He gets real about how to tell if porn is a problem and what to do about it. He also tells us how we can prepare our kids for their inevitable encounter with porn, which is happening at startlingly earlier ages.

Pornography changes your values as a man.—J.K. Emezi

 

The Porn Addiction Problem

When it comes to internet porn, we have no idea what we’re up against. In the olden days, porn was hard to get. It was in the magazine rack behind the counter or the back room of a video store. Now it is available at anytime of day, in any place, at the tip of our fingers. J.K. Emezi says the most common place men watch pornography is at work.

The most disturbing thing about internet porn is that our kids are being exposed to it before they understand what they are looking at. In decades past, kids may not have run into porn until their teens, but in 2016, 11 was the average age of a child’s first exposure. Now, the age is 8.

J.K. Emezi had his own struggle with pornography and discovered that many of the men he worked with did too. Forums were filled with men who were seeking help, but there weren’t any resources. J.K. first began blogging anonymously about recovering from his porn addiction, but he eventually came out into the open to help others end their out-of-control behavior with porn, sex and masturbation.

What You’ll Learn

  • J.K. Emezi’s background as a bible salesman
  • Where and when the porn problem begins
  • How parents are getting too lax with computers and devices
  • How there is actually Minecraft porn now
  • Why one talk with your kids about porn is not enough. It must be randomly brought up from time to time.
  • Why porn is just as bad as drugs or alcohol
  • When porn is okay
  • Why men watch porn, especially at work
  • The role of brain chemicals in porn addiction
  • How to rewire your brain for monogamy
  • How to reconnect and become aroused again by your partner
  • How porn addiction, little by little, destroys your values
  • Why some women view porn as cheating and suffer ‘betrayal trauma’
  • How to define a compulsive sexual behavior
  • If, when, and how to disclose a porn problem to your spouse
  • Why masturbation is normal, but porn is not
  • What can men do when their wife is pregnant or has just given birth and can’t have sex
  • Why watching unrealistic bodies is unfair to your wife
  • How to use a rubber band to snap out of physical urges
  • How to anchor yourself in the morning to stick to your recovery goals
  • How to clean up your online environment to avoid triggers
  • How to interrupt porn urges by journaling and visualization
  • Advice for men in sexless marriages

 

MENTIONED EPISODES:

Porn – Why We Watch It, When It’s a Problem, and How to Stop with Nell Daly

Porn Addiction and Affair Recovery Mentoring

How to Talk to Your Kids About Pornography with Kristen Jenson

Video Game, Porn, and Social Media Addiction with Cam Adair


Like the show? Leave an iTunes review.

If you’re enjoying the show, we encourage you to leave an itunes review.
We read reviews on the show every week. The next one might be yours!
Thanks for the support.

CLICK HERE.


J.K. Emezi’s Links

elevatedrecovery.org

Private Facebook Group

Instagram

Youtube

Twitter

Resources

Fill out an application for The Dad Edge Alliance

Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


Hungry for more out of life?

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the dad edge alliance


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June 6th – 8th 2019

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How to Talk to Your Kids About Pornography

How to Talk to Your Kids About Pornography with Kristen Jenson


Kristen Jenson is the author of Good Pictures Bad Pictures: Porn-Proofing Today’s Young Kids. In this show, she tells us how to initiate a healthy conversation with our kids about pornography according to age group. She also gives a 1, 2, 3 action plan for kids so they know what to do if they see pornography.

Kristen explains the brain science behind pornography addiction and how it warps the mind. She also explains how it can lead to relationship problems and even erectile dysfunction.

This is a scary topic, but it’s up to parents to start the conversation as early as possible before kids get the wrong ideas about sex and intimacy from the internet. Save this episode!

'If you want your kids to have a healthy view of sex and intimacy, then you have to step it up and have these conversations at a young a before they see it on the internet.' – @ProtectYM #kids #children #parenting #pornaddiction Click To Tweet

Kristen Jenson

Kristen Jenson never planned on writing a book about pornography until she met the mother of a large family who was doing her best to raise her kids with healthy values. Then the woman discovered her 17-year-old son molested all of his siblings, from the ages of 14 to 4. He had been into pornography.

Pornography has never been more accessible. Now, all that’s needed is an internet connection to see anything and everything that is out there. Our kids are on electronics devices all the time and even if we have filters in place, we cannot control what they see outside the home.

Child-on-child sexual abuse and porn addiction numbers are rising. After Kristen saw this problem affecting so many kids, she researched to see what books were available on the topic. She couldn’t find any. This compelled her to do something about it. Her first book has been a bestseller on Amazon for the better part of three years.

'If you become their wiling expert on sex, they’re going to go to you.' – Kristen Jenson #sex #sexed #kids #children #parenting #dads #fathers Click To Tweet


What You’ll Learn

  • How using a book is an easier way to jump into the subject of pornography with your kids
  • Other ways to segue into conversations about sex and pornography
  • Why it’s easier to talk about pornography with your kids when they are younger
  • The common denominator of all porn addicts
  • How you are competing with the porn industry in the sex education of your child
  • What to do if you don’t know how to answer a question about pornography
  • How to keep your kids from sharing things they learn about sex and pornography with friends or younger siblings
  • How much detail to give about sex and pornography
  • Why it’s important to explain that sex is more than just for reproduction
  • How porn acts like a drug on the brain
  • Why people who use porn are less satisfied in their marriage and are more likely to be unfaithful
  • How porn can lead to erectile dysfunction
  • The difference between the thinking brain and the feeling brain
  • Why you should be wary of allowing your children to have their own devices
  • Resources for parents on how to protect your kids
'If you wait till your kids come to talk to you (about sex and pornography), you put a huge burden on them.' – Kristen Jenson #kids #children #communication #parents #parentingtips #family Click To Tweet

We appreciate all the support!

If you’re enjoying the show, we encourage you to leave an itunes review.


Kristen Jenson’s Links

Website

Facebook

Twitter

Instagram

Amazon


THE DAD EDGE SUMMIT 2018

JUNE 7TH – 9TH – ST. LOUIS

Are you an extraordinary father looking to accelerate in all aspects of your life?
Are you looking to connect to like-minded Dads that want to come together to strengthen and grow in their abilities both personally and professionally?
The Dad Edge 2018 Summit (Live Event) will set you up to do exactly that.

LEARN MORE


Resources

The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


Create an Epic Life

join The Dad Edge Alliance

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