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modern fatherhood

Modern Fatherhood: Intentionality, Equality, and Vision

Lawrence Gordon grew up with a single mom who showed him how to be resilient, but his father was out of the picture. As he grew up, his priorities were misdirected, and his first marriage ended in divorce. As an adult, Lawrence realized that it was up to him to seek male role models and learn how to navigate the challenges of modern fatherhood.

Today, Lawrence is the happily remarried father of three. He is passionate about getting men involved in reading to their kids with children’s books that his kids help him create. He talks about the silver linings of the coronavirus pandemic when it comes to family. He also goes into how we can do our part to raise awareness about equality and give back to our communities to mentor the next generation of strong family leaders.

Lawrence Gordon

Lawrence M. Gordon II was born on March 17th in Columbia, SC, and grew up in Maple Hts in Cleveland, OH and spent his senior year in Newport News, VA graduating high school at Denbigh.

His late mom, Dacia, was a high school teacher and his late father, Morris Sr, served in the army where he retired. His older sibling Keione help him navigate through humble beginnings.

Lawrence’s passion for sharing stories with his children, family members, and the community is something he knows will help create an impact.  Lawrence knows the role of the male in children’s lives is necessary and wants to encourage men everywhere to read more to the children in their home, and communities.

Lawrence Gordon is married to Sarah Gordon.  They live in South Carolina with daughter, Lauren, Landen, and Henry who help inspire the content of his books.

Books by LG

Books By LG exist to inspire dads, uncles, grandfathers & male role models everywhere to read more books to children as a way of building bonds, inspiring dreams, and to be intentional about storytime.

What You’ll Learn

  • Being a dad is tough when you don’t have a male role model to teach you accountability, responsibility, and intentionality.
  • Being proactive about seeking and choosing men as role models
  • Lawrence used to think that obsessing over work was the highest priority.
  • He didn’t realize that as his family was neglected, and his first marriage ended in divorce.
  • You can save the world, but if you lose your family in the process, what is it worth?
  • If his children are not involved in his work, Lawrence won’t have anything to do with it.
  • Lawrence gets three nights out of the week to do what he wants. The other nights are family nights.
  • Make sure you are prepared for quality time, where you are present and energetic.
  • How the pandemic has shifted our view of what’s important
  • Sometimes through tragedy, you discover a gift inside of you, and if you give it space to grow and develop, it can change you.
  • His daughter helped him write his book, Unicorn Dreams.
  • His son helped him with his upcoming release about fear and bullies.
  • Why every father should give their son an heirloom gift
  • You should never tell your son to man up.
  • To all those who have a vision, go for it. Don’t give up because you don’t know how to get there. Learn how to make it happen.
  • As men, we have to build a community focused on inclusion, building a bridge to our kids.
  • What more can we do for #BlackLivesMatter?
  • Pay your successes forward. If you have the resources, put your money to work in community. Show up with finances, passion, and consistency.
  • Surround yourself with people who make you try your hardest.
  • Leave this life on empty. Don’t leave anything left in the tank!

MENTIONED EPISODES

Strong Fathers, Strong Kids with Meg Meeker

 


Protect your kids with the Bark App

cyberbullying

sexual content

suicidal ideation

online predators


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Inadequacy, Insecurity, and Imposter Syndrome

Inadequacy, Insecurity, and Imposter Syndrome with Mike Kitko


Do you feel the need to be perfect, and at the same time, think you’ll never be good enough? As a man, husband, and father, are you plagued by deep-rooted feelings of insecurity and inadequacy, leaving you terrified that people will find out you have no idea what you’re doing? That’s your imposter in charge and he’s preventing you from living as who you really are.

Mike Kitko is an Executive Self-Mastery Coach, speaker, and author. After a colossal career and personal meltdown, he found his true purpose—inspiring leaders to find the power in their authenticity, purpose, and passion.

Today, Mike Kitko talks about how inadequacy, insecurity, and imposter syndrome ruled his life. He teaches us how to cultivate self-awareness and diffuse the imposter before it sabotages us. He also tells us how to stop running from fear and start chasing our purpose so we can provide a loving, safe, and prosperous environment for our families.

Do you suffer from imposter syndrome? How do you defeat the imposter in charge? Find out in this episode!

Mike Kitko

A Marine with an MBA, Mike has decades of experience in leadership roles for Fortune 500 companies, yet he always felt like an imposter. His outward persona was one of strength and wealth, yet he struggled internally with self-confidence and self-fulfillment. His inability to understand his emotions led him to alcoholism, uncontrolled anger, and ballistic rage. He abused his marriage, family, professional career, and health.

Through coaching, intense study, and deep work, Mike learned to embrace self-doubt and care for his body, mind, emotions, and soul with self-mastery. Now Mikes overflowing energy, clarity, and love inspires souls. With an infectious zest for life, internal power, and inward confidence that matches how people perceive him externally, Mike has turned his life around. And he wants to help you to do the same.

If you can’t feel it, you can’t heal it, and if you can’t heal it, you can’t be you.—Mike Kitko

The Imposter in Charge

Life’s good, right? You’ve got the high-paying job, the car, the home, the family–so why do you feel so incomplete?

Maybe your ego is bursting at the seams and you can’t show yourself for who you really are. Perhaps you have no boundaries and you pour yourself into others–their problems, their pressures, their pleasures–at the expense of yourself and your own family. You might think you need to be perfect but are acutely aware that you’re not good enough. Could it be that deep-down you feel inadequate, incapable, and like a fraud?

You don’t have to live like that. The Imposter in Charge is the vulnerable and raw account of Mike Kitko’s journey from being an overweight, overstressed, overachieving alcoholic business executive who was on the brink of divorce, to a life of authenticity, courage, confidence, and clarity. This transparent account offers a then-to-now experience, as well as practical applications and practices to help you break out of the imposter syndrome yourself–once and for all.

What You’ll Learn

  • Men learn from a very young age to not be real, vulnerable, and or have emotions.
  • When we wear a mask and shrink, we can’t really feel human.
  • What it means when everything you thought would bring you happiness doesn’t.
  • How the world loves you exactly the way you are. When you realize that, things start to change
  • Mike used to be over 300 pounds and an alcoholic.
  • When Mike figured out that he had nothing figured out
  • When Mike quit drinking, he lost who he thought were friends, but then real people showed up.
  • How Mike made the bold move to leave his corporate job and create his coaching business.
  • How he fell head over heels in love with his wife again after their marriage was nearly destroyed.
  • Perfection is impossible
  • Emotions are going to make us behave badly.
  • Accept that on the journey of improvement, you’re going to stumble,
  • Why you must surrender to the natural feeling of inadequacy and insecurity.
  • What is a critical purpose decision?
  • 90% of people are running away from fear. 10% are chasing purpose.
  • We’re not here to survive, play small, provide and buy more stuff.
  • You don’t have to sacrifice yourself to have a lucrative business.
  • Your desires are your gateway to understanding what purpose you serve.
  • How men can find their true purpose and make sure they’re not chasing someone else’s purpose.
  • Lack of self-awareness drives the imposter syndrome.
  • The importance of knowing your talents and weaknesses.
  • Getting and staying in your “zone of genius” as much as possible
  • Clarity is a creative force.
  • His mission is to move men from survivorship to leadership
    • Yourself
    • Society
    • Family
  • We can’t provide a safe prosperous loving environment for our families if we are not living authentically.
  • Love = Letting Others Voluntarily Evolve
  • How we’re inadvertently telling our kids their choices aren’t good enough.
  • We’re not here to help our kids avoid mistakes, but to help them make choices after they understand the consequences.

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How to Stop Being A Miserable F*ck with John Kim

How to Stop Being A Miserable F*ck with John Kim

Sometimes, the men who seem to have it all together are the ones who are suffering the most. Today’s guest John Kim was a licensed therapist and a life coach who was unfulfilled and hating life. A divorce forced him to begin looking inward and start his blog called The Angry Therapist to share his journey from being a boy to becoming a man.

John Kim just published his book, I Used to Be a Miserable F*ck: An Everyman’s Guide to a Meaningful Life, in which he shares his “self-help in a shot glass” tips on how to step into manhood and live a life of purpose and passion! Learn about man dates, bedroom mistakes, and why you shouldn’t pee in the shower.

'Now’s the time men are making their return.'—John Kim @angrytherapist #men #dads #fathers #manhood #fatherhood Click To Tweet

John Kim

John Kim practices complete authenticity and transparency with his many clients (frowned upon in the clinical world) and continues to look for new and unconventional ways to help people. He created the Catalyst Life Coaching Course, an online life coaching certification program, and recently started a new platform called SHFT, an app that gives people support in their pocket when they need it and the chance to become a life coach themselves. John Kim lives in Los Angeles where he makes videos on his phone, CrossFits, and rides his motorcycle to coffee shops to do sessions.

His parents did the best with what they had. They came to America from Korea with no money. They were always working and living in survival mode. His father wasn’t available emotionally and was an alcoholic. A child of the 80s, pop culture raised John and he found self-worth in skateboarding and breakdancing.

As John became and adult, he realized that all he thought he wanted wasn’t bringing him happiness. When he became a therapist and began working for non-profits, he witnessed the byproducts of dads being absent—physically and emotionally. He thought about his own childhood and how the cycle of dysfunction, codependency, and addiction starts with fatherless homes. He often wondered, what are men missing?

'We live in a fatherless nation.'—John Kim @angrytherapist #men #dads #fathers Click To Tweet

What You’ll Learn

  • The difference between responding and reacting
  • How being reactive recreates damaging patterns of the past
  • How to respond in order to change all your human collisions throughout the day
  • How to create emotional space by trying to understand before trying to be understood
  • The most toxic sentences for men—be a man, or man up
  • Why instead of being a man you should practice being human
  • How to give yourself a break when you react negatively
  • How to”re-worth” yourself
  • Why men resist the idea of self-care
  • Why self care helps you to create a stronger life-container so that you can show up better for everyone else
  • How the silliest white lies create hairline cracks of trust in a relationship
  • Why you shouldn’t perform in the bedroom
  • How porn gives a warped definition of what good sex looks like
  • How performing during sex disconnects you and breeds resentment with your partner
  • The goal of John Kim’s book
  • The best way to teach your kids not to lie
  • How to get your kids’ respect by adding an extra layer of vulnerability
  • His parting piece of wisdom for dads—look inward

MENTIONED EPISODES:

All the Money You Will Ever Need with Grant Sabatier

F*ck Your Feelings with Ryan Munsey

How to Unf*ck Yourself with Gary John Bishop


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48 Days to The Work You Love with Dan Miller

Episode Overview on 48 Days to The Work You Love with Dan Miller:

Larry and Shawn interview Dan Miller, international best-seller of 48 Days to the Work You Love, No More Dreaded Mondays, and Wisdom Meets Passion. He has appeared on the CBS Morning Show, MSNBC’s Hardball With Chris Matthews, Moody Midday Connection and the Dave Ramsey Show. He reaches over 130,000 listeners on his podcast and speaks across the country helping others find fulfillment and the work they love. And it all started in a Sunday school class…

Key Takeaways:

There you sit-Superman logo on the t-shirt the kids gave you last Father’s Day, #1 Dad mug perched on the coaster imprinted with your progeny’s latest snapshot; their adorable smiles glaring back at you. To them you are Superman, but some days you feel more like Superman after a bout with Lex Luthor and Kryptonite.

Not only are you “dad”, you are spouse, provider, and friend. You “have” to bring in that paycheck so you can provide everything your family wants and needs. But at what cost? Ever feel like you’re working tirelessly for that paycheck and then you have nothing mentally or physically to give your family when you do go home? Are you working to live or are you living to work? Maybe it’s a quiet desperation you are living because you think you are trapped in a less-than-stellar job just to provide for your family.

If you’re not passionate about what you are doing to bring home that paycheck, maybe it’s time to reevaluate your work life. We’re not saying go ahead and quit your day job, but it’s worth exploring the possibility of finding what you really want to do with your life.

It takes a true mind-shift. We’ve been conditioned to think that if we just work harder or put in more time, we will make more money or get that promotion. It’s not like that anymore. The economy has shifted from paying for time to paying for value. In other words, paying for the finished product or service rather than paying for the time put into that service or product. So, the old 9-5 model isn’t really driving the work force any longer.

Wouldn’t it be great if you could make what you needed to provide for your family, have more time for your family and enjoy doing it? Sounds like a pipe-dream, right? Dan Miller has done it and helped many others do it, too, by simply helping people tap into their passion. He outlines three steps to accomplish this goal:

  1. Identify your unique passion. What can you bring to other people that would benefit them? Maybe you have a great talent at creating something or maybe you are wonderful at motivating others.
  2. Be clear about what you want to do and put it into an economic model. Once you have found your passion, be specific about it and the goals you have for its success.
  3. Actually do it. It’s one thing to have a great idea; it’s another to execute it.
    Once you have aligned your work with what you love, your passion, you will have that work-life balance. Those around you will take notice and be inspired, especially your kids. Achieving this balance will no doubt rub off on your own children and they, in turn, will be able to carry this into their adult lives.

So, go back to your chair in your Superman shirt and your #1 Dad mug and smile gleefully back at that snapshot of your kids. Now you have hope that you can have time for your family and love what you do to provide for them. Goodbye “work Kryptonite”, hello leaping from tall buildings in a single bound.

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