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the dad edge

The Dad Edge Mailbox for May 2019


We’re going to do something new for Thursday Throwdown. I receive a lot of emails from listeners, so in this episode I’m going to answer three questions from The Dad Edge mailbox. Send your email to support@gooddadproject.com and your question might be featured in the next show!

Today we’re going to cover three topics:

  1. How to get a child to listen and obey without yelling.
  2. How to stay motivated when you’re in a funk.
  3. How to start a side-hustle without sacrificing family time.

My son is two years old and he is currently at the stage where he is not listening. He’s actively trying to ignore us when asked to do things. He seems to respond immediately if my voice gets raised and I yell, although I don’t like raising my voice and I don’t want to make a habit of doing it. Any tips? — Ben

  • If you want kids to listen, get down on their level, touch them on the shoulder and look them in the eyes when you speak to them
  • Nobody likes being told what to do, even kids. Empower them by forcing them to make decisions. Give them a choice of how or when to do whatever it is they are refusing to do.

How do you tackle a slump of motivation and bring yourself back into focus?

  1. Give yourself grace for being in a slump. You’ll make it worse by beating yourself up about it.
  2. Remind yourself of what is it your chasing. What is your desired end-goal? What will you feel like once you accomplish it?
  3. Make a plan to jump back in. Remind yourself by looking at your map of what you need to do. The best time to take action is now.
  4. Find someone you can partner up with for accountability.

Do you have any suggestions on a side hustle or part time job that won’t take time away from my family?

  • Ask yourself, what do you like doing? You’ll be spending a lot of time working on it. Make sure it’s something you like.
  • Audit your time. It may feel like you don’t have enough time to develop a side-business, but how many hours are you spending watching Netflix?
  • We do more before 8 a.m. than the rest of the world if we wake up a few hours early. You can rack up 10 or 12 hours per week to devote to your new business this way. That’s 40 hours a month—a whole work week!
  • Think about ways to develop passive income that require minimal time and attention, like real estate investments.

Have a question for The Dad Edge? Send it to support@gooddadproject.com.

 


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Resources

Fill out an application for The Dad Edge Alliance

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


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June 6th – 8th 2019

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Coaching Kids for Greatness with former NFL player Anthony Trucks

Coaching Kids for Greatness with former NFL player Anthony Trucks


If you are the coach or parent of a youth athlete, this episode is an absolute game changer. I invited former NFL player Anthony Trucks to my home in St. Louis to do a live Q & A session with dads, kids, and coaches to answer questions about adversity, perseverance, and practice.

Whether it’s football, dance, baseball, soccer, martial arts or track and field, Trucks gives us amazing insights on how to coach the right way and help our kids optimize their mental game for greatness.

'You want something big? Find a solution before you find an excuse.'—@AnthonyTrucks #coaching #mindset #youthsports #kids #children #parenting Click To Tweet

Anthony Trucks

Anthony Trucks was the poster child for “disadvantaged youth.” His mom gave him away along with his siblings when he was three years old. They were separated when he was put into the foster care system where languished for eleven years until he was adopted at the age of fourteen.

Anthony knew he didn’t want to keep going down the path he was on. He didn’t know what greatness was, but he knew he wanted to achieve it. He discovered football and chose to be good at it. Anthony was determined not to become another statistic and practiced obsessively. His superhuman effort paid off when he received a college scholarship and went on to play for the NFL.

Anthony Trucks now owns a gym and appears on American Ninja Warrior. He says he’s had a blast on his roller coaster of a life. His mission is to try to improve peoples’ lives by sharing his experiences.

'Trust in your hustle.'—@AnthonyTrucks #hustle #perseverance #motivation #inspiration Click To Tweet

What You’ll Learn

  • Anthony Truck’s advice for men growing up in adversity (drugs, alcohol, abuse) who believe they can’t live a successful life
  • Why we feel comfortable with the “crazy we know”
  • How it was as a kid without a real mom to support him.
  • How he made childhood adversity into his teacher
  • Why the biggest thing we can do for our families is carve out a golden block of focused time
  • Which parent should do the disciplining
  • What motivates Anthony when he wants to give up
  • The two anchors that keep Anthony grounded, yet inspired to push harder
  • Advice he would give if he were eleven years old, “Find someone who cares about you and do what they tell you to do.”
  • How to push through moments of hopelessness and the urge to give up
  • What it felt like to walk into a crowded stadium as an NFL player
  • His advice for kids who want to be in the NFL
  • How to balance coaching skills to help kids stay motivated without pushing them too hard
  • How kids hear parents differently
  • How kids need to be loved by parents and coached by coaches
  • How to help kids get clear about their goals
  • How coaches can get kids to summon their aggression
  • How to coach kids when they are on social media comparing their athletic performances
  • Why parents are responsible for giving their kids a sense of self-worth
  • Why as a parent, you can’t let the outside world define who you are
  • What advice Anthony Trucks would give his 10-year-old self
  • Anthony’s advice for a long-term relationship
  • How pressure has helped him find greatness
  • How to handle pressure by thinking of the end result
  • His favorite thing to do with his family!
'The more work you put into something past the point of difficulty, that’s how you separate yourself from the pack.'—@AnthonyTrucks #youthathletes #dreams #goals #perseverance Click To Tweet

MENTIONED EPISODE: Defying All Odds with Anthony Trucks


Thanks for making us the #1 Dad podcast on iTunes!

Like the show? Leave an iTunes review.

If you’re enjoying the show, we encourage you to leave an itunes review.
We read reviews on the show every week. The next one might be yours!
Thanks for the support.


Anthony Trucks’s Links

anthonytrucks.com

Facebook

Twitter

Instagram

Resources

Fill out an application for The Dad Edge Alliance

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


Hungry for more out of life?

Become a member of The Dad Edge Alliance

CLICK HERE!

Dad Edge Alliance


What did you think of the show?

What was your biggest take away?

Tag us when you share on social media!

Twitter @gooddadprojct

Instagram @good_dad_project

no barriers

How to Live Life with No Barriers with Erik Weihenmayer

Defying the odds, overcoming adversity and summiting the top of Mount Everest as a blind person – you do not want to miss today’s episode on how to live life with No Barriers with Erik Weihenmayer.

Erik Weihenmayer is an American athlete, adventurer, author, activist and motivational speaker, and the only blind person to reach the summit of Mount Everest.

Erik was affected by a rare genetic disease called retinoschisis. He went completely blind a week before his Freshman year in high school, a difficult age even for sighted kids. He remembers having to be lead into school as a newly blind person. It was a sad time. He sat by himself in the cafeteria and heard all the excitement and joy of kids around him. He knew he didn’t want to be sitting at a table by himself listening to life go by. He wanted to be in the action.

But Erik’s first reaction to going blind was anger, frustration, blaming, and lashing out. He fell off docks and slammed into walls. With support from his family and friends, he got got through it. He realized he needed to find his own way and had to decide what he feared most – fear of living inside a prison vs. fear of getting out.

Erik chose to take the road that had potential to lead him out of the darkness. He found blind friends who went rock climbing. He learned to use his hands and feet as his eyes. He learned to read Braille and use a cane, and this led him back to the world. Through his struggles, Erik realized that the fun of life is discovering your own way forward.

 

You’re not going to do it like the next person. Challenges bring new discoveries.

 

Erik found his own way of doing things as a blind man, and achieved his dream of climbing Mount Everest. It’s unbelievable that eighteen years before, he couldn’t even find the bathroom by himself.

 

What within us is stronger than what’s in our way.

 

Having a Rope Team

One of the most important elements of mountaineering is having a rope team. Erik says men also need to have a rope team for daily life. We all need help to do the great things we need to do.

Erik says life for men without rope team is lonely and brutal. He tells the tragic story of his brother who died from complications due to alcoholism. His brother was a great person, but he wouldn’t let anyone in. Not accepting help from others leads to a short and unhappy life. We’re all in the same boat, reaching to overcome obstacles, and having a support system is crucial.

On Fatherhood

Erik has two teenagers and admits that climbing Everest doesn’t make him a cooler dad in their eyes. In his family, they try to get back to the basics. When his kids were little, he always got down on the floor and played with them. Now that his kids are teenagers, they sit at the table together. Erik makes sure they’re not just talking at each other, but being open and listening. I’m here for you always, he tells his kids a lot, and tries to demonstrate that same message through his actions.

The family also gets away as much as they can. They do summer trips together in the wilderness and on the white water. Erik says they each push themselves in different ways and experience the learning process together.

During breaks, they talk about their adventures, the ups and downs, and the triumphs. Erik believes that the outdoors is the richest laboratory for parenting his kids. They get a chance to step away from all the high-tech stuff and immerse themselves in the creative process.

Live Life with No Barriers

It’s in our nature to avoid failure, to shy away from risk and fear. Sitting around, watching TV, and eating pizza is much easier. It’s safe. It’s comfortable, but it’s not living life to the fullest.

Erik says as parents, we must sweep our children out into the world. They will get broken, and it will be hard. They’ll get bombarded. Sometimes a blow or setback makes a direct strike. At this point, Erik tries to get his kids to stretch their barriers. They will have to decide if they are going to shrink in retreat, or use the challenge to get bigger and better. They practice taking adversity, using it as fuel, and converting into light.

Erik Weihenmayer’s Dad Wisdom

Erik keeps an open heart policy in his household. He had to figure out how to make himself vulnerable and lean into bad experiences. He teaches his kids to do the same.

He also makes sure his kids understand that their dreams are credible and that their thoughts matter. Let them know they have inside what it takes to blaze into the world.

Erik’s last piece of dad advice is to send kids over the fence and into the wilderness. Give them unsupervised, unstructured time outdoors. The creativity they develop will lead to pioneering spirit that will take them through the adventure of life.

 

Referenced Episode: How to Teach Our Kids to Win at Losing with Sam Weinman

 


Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


Erik Weihenmayer’s Links

NoBarriers

Website

Amazon

Facebook

Instagram

Twitter

YouTube