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Finding Your Inner Strength Through Adversity Comes from Within with Ben Newman

Ben Newman

Ben Newman is an author, public speaker, and financial advisor coach. He is famous for being the Mental Conditioning Coach for the Alabama Crimson Tide Football Team. Ben helps sales and sports teams around the world and specializes in mental toughness. He helps people build a stronger commitment to their purpose and process by educating them on building mental toughness. Taking ownership when you’re wrong is the first step to maturity. It allows you to look past your pride and admit that you messed up and that you want to make it right. Taking ownership also means figuring out what you want to do in or with your life and OWNING it.

Finding strength in adversity comes from within. It happens when you’re at the end of your rope, when you feel the most hopeless. You have a choice to make. Do you want to give up, or do you want to find your inner strength and push forward? 

Lastly, taking action. Taking action occurs when you least WANT to. It happens when you’re tired, and you don’t feel like doing anything, or you can’t find the motivation. After taking action, you begin to feel better and wonder what the big fuss was all about. This is the first step to CHANGE. 

What You’ll Learn: 

[4:20]

Ben talks about his childhood. He recalls how he had to grow up fast during his youth. His mother passed 11 days before his 8th birthday.

[9:17]

Ben recalls how he processed his mom’s death. He recalls being angry as a way to deal with the event.

[11:23]

Newman recalls the love he felt from the motherly figures in his life that gave him that connection he was missing.

[13:44]

Ben remembers how it was living with his father during his youth. He learned what it meant to work, and take care of himself.

[15:48]

Newman talks about basketball being the outlet of choice for him.

[19:07]

Ben recalls his post-performance talks with his dad.

[22:00]

Ben shares his hypothetical response toward his son if his son came to him, and said he didn’t want to play basketball anymore.

[26:04]

Ben gives advice for any parent that struggles to let their kids come to them first about sports, instead of using the harsh, yelling method.

[31:45]

Ben talks about his current relationship with his father.

[32:30]

Ben recalls the events during his teenage years, and how he dealt with not having a mother in his life.

[36:44]

Newman talks about how he came about to the work he does currently.

[40:53]

Ben talks about his life coach, and how his coach has helped him. His exposure to coaches led him to his current career.

[42:19]

We have 100% control over our mindset.

[47:08]

Ben talks about his high points over the course of his career.

[55:07]

Ben recalls how he keeps his marriage alive.

[58:59]

Ben talks about what it means to live legendary.

[1:02:14]

Ben talks about what he would hypothetically say to his mom if he were to have dinner with her one night.

[1:05:33]

Newman hypothetically talks about what his family would talk about around the dinner table in 30 years.

RELATED EPISODES:

How Overcoming Adversity Can Make You a Better Dad with Nick Dinardo

Weird & Wonderful Ways to Build Mental Resilience with Ben Aldridge

Finding the Strength Through the Struggle


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Ben Newman

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Living Your Most Authentic Self as a Husband, Father, and Business Owner with Scott Holman

Scott Holman

Scott Holman is a husband, father, business owner, and founder of the program Stop Clowning Around. Scott’s day job is the Director of Sales for national accounts for a very large security company. Scott’s organization, Stop Clowning Around, is about developing human beings into a level of mastery. He has also recently taken on two properties that he has flipped for financial investment.

Scott’s number one asset that he pushes is learning how to view things from someone else’s perspective. Perspective drives everything in life, especially our interactions. Everyone has a different set of lenses they see the world through, and we can’t change that. You will be much better as a person and as a business leader if you learn to look at things from someone else’s perspective.

Another thing that Scott practices regularly with his wife and children is communication. Communication is key to healthy marriage, along with being each other’s best friend. Communication and time are the key to raising your children to be strong men and women. Being there for your wife and kids, and not telling them how to do things or “fix it” for them is the driving factor in successful relationships.

Asking someone a series of questions that will lead them down the path of discovery is much better than fixing the problem for them. Most people don’t need us to tell them that we’re doing something wrong, they need us to walk the path with them and allow themselves to vocalize it, so they can take the action step at the end. This means, being intentional and allowing yourself to sit and listen, when you’d rather take control of the situation.

As men, we are the leaders and masters of 3 areas – ourselves, our families, and our businesses. In order to live legendary, we have to understand that life is always about the journey of mastery. It isn’t about the destination of mastery, and never having to learn. We are constantly learning along the journey, and that’s how we become legendary!

What You’ll Learn: 

[3:10]

Scott talks about how Monday’s are the best days, right after Friday’s because you don’t need to wait for a fresh start.

[4:32]

Scott talks about how he shifted his mindset about Monday’s.

[6:31]

Scott talks about his family and how he has one set of biological children, and another set of adopted biracial children. He has been married to his wife for over 24 years.

[9:22]

Scott talks about how he has been able to have such a successful marriage.

[11:42]

Scott talks about how his kids to be strong confident men and women.

[16:09]

Scott talks about how he has been successful with changing his perspective when he communicates with his wife.

[21:55]

Scott recalls the things that will be different in his marriage from now until his 25th year of marriage.

[24:18]

Scott talks about all of his current projects.

[28:01]

Scott talks about the secret behind his success.

[33:20]

Scott talks about what it means to live legendary.

[37:07]

Scott thinks about what his family would be talking about if they were to all sit around the table 25 years from now.

[39:12]

Scott talks about Stop Clowning Around.

[42:36]

Scott talks about what things have been happening in his life the past year.

[46:13]

Scott talks about the vision for his brand for the next 12 months.

RELATED EPISODES:

Living Your Authentic Life

Parenting with Leadership with Stewart Friedman and Alyssa Westring

Communication with Your Wife: What You’re Missing


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Scott Holman

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Mindset is the Key to Success with Vernon Fox III

Vernon Fox III

Vernon Fox III is a retired football player, husband, father, coach, consultant, and international public speaker. Fox played for the San Diego Chargers, Detroit Lions, Washington Redskins, and Denver Broncos. He was awarded MVP for Special Teams He was raised in a strong Christian household where his father was physically and emotionally present in his life. Vernon speaks fondly of his father as a positive role model; he was a faithful and stable figure in Fox’s life. When it comes to success, it’s really about your mindset that makes you successful, not your skill set. If you have a strong mentality to persevere through hard times, you’ll be ten times more successful than the person with just a strong skill set. Mindset requires training and practice, it doesn’t just happen overnight.Excuses are justifications for losers; it’s you trying to find an escape route. A reason is something that’s outside your control. Most people will try to find a way to turn their excuse into a reason, and you can’t live life that way. If you own up to what you can control, and you understand what you cannot control, you can separate it from the beginning. When you do this, you end up not living by the excuses. Perseverance is not something you are born with. It’s something you learn and adapt to. You have to decide within yourself that you aren’t going to quit, no matter what life throws at you. You’re going to pick yourself and try again tomorrow. This is how you become successful no matter what your skills are and no matter where you come from.

What You’ll Learn: 

[3:42]

Vernon talks about his childhood and how much his parents had an influence in his life.

[10:31]

Vernon recalls how he implements the values he learned from his parents in his own life with his marriage and children.

[12:15]

Vernon talks about the things his mother taught him about what a woman needs.

[15:36]

Vernon talks about mindset lessons he learned while playing professional football.

[18:02]

Vernon talks about how he had to strengthen his mindset when he would move every couple of years to play for different teams.

[21:17]

Vernon talks about the strength of his faith during his professional football years.

[23:08]

Vernon talks about his 2 children, a son and a daughter, and the differences between raising each one.

[29:12]

Vernon talks about how he’s been able to cultivate strong leadership out of his son’s stubborn, competitive attitude.

[32:27]

Vernon talks about what is most important to raise a strong, confident daughter.

[34:29]

Vernon talks about a reason versus an excuse.

[36:40]

Vernon talks about a quote that he lives by and takes a lot of pride in, “Work like it all depends on you, and pray like it all depends on God.”

[39:19]

Vernon talks about what it means to live legendary.

[41:22]

Vernon discusses a quote by Napoleon Hill and what it means to him.

[44:48]

Vernon talks about sustainability as a man, and what it means to keep on the right path.

RELATED EPISODES:

Pressure, Perseverance, and Fatherhood with UFC Fighter James Krause

How to Optimize and Integrate Your Mindset For a Fantastic Life with David Anderson

How Fatherhood is Leadership with TEDx Speaker Devon Bandison


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Vernon Fox III

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how to motivate

How to Motivate the Unmotivated with Matt Granados


Most of us want to accomplish many things in life. We know we need to take action to improve our health, relationships, finances, and careers. But we wake up every morning without the motivation. Today’s guest is the expert on how to motivate the unmotivated.

Matt Granados is speaker, coach, and the author of Motivate the Unmotivated: A proven system for sustainable motivation. He reveals the difference between motivated and unmotivated people. He talks about how motivation is not a character trait, but a state of mind. He also tells us how we can strengthen the connection between actions and outcomes to motivate ourselves and others, including our kids.

Get ready to systemize motivation and finally make things happen!

Being motivated is not a character trait, it’s a state of mind.

Matt Granados

Over the last decade, Matt has tested, developed and helped thousands of others implement an effective and easy to duplicate system that will help you build an unbreakable foundation for your life as well as motivate even the most unmotivated individuals in your life.

These techniques in versions such as keynotes, workshops, and individual coaching have been taught and implemented in organizations of all industries and sizes. From Google Headquarters and Twitter to the United States Airforce and professional organizations all around the world. Matt has been able to teach these systems to thousands of individuals along with his team at Life Pulse, Inc.

With over 10 years and 10,000 hours of studying, using, and teaching these concepts, Matt is considered to be an expert on teaching individuals how to build an unbreakable foundation for themselves as well as their organization, along with how to properly manage motivation.

Matt is happily married to his wife and business partner (Maria) with two amazing kids (Natalie & Zach). The drive behind Matt is his obsession to make sure no person’s potential is wasted and that each person he comes in contact with, if they want, is able to experience their maximum level of success.

Motivate the Unmotivated: A proven system for sustainable motivation

Finally, a book that gives you applicable, implementable techniques for how to boost motivation in all areas of your life—as well as the lives of others. You know “what” you should do in order to motivate yourself and others. So why don’t you do it? No one has ever systemized the “How” to what you already know you should do. This book does!

What You’ll Learn

  • How to stop starting over
  • Why are some people motivated while others are not?
  • The difference between fear-based motivation and love-based motivation
  • Why you should never make your kids the butt of a joke
  • Allow your kids to fail and learn.
  • The dad is not supposed to be a friend to his kids. He is there to provide, protect, and prepare.
  • Matt’s journey with his daughter’s extremely rare genetic disorder
  • A happy family is not an accident. It’s intentional work.
  • Men try to fix problems instead of dealing with them.
  • Most guys would say that they are the emotionally stable one in their relationships, but the reality is that they are emotionally suppressed.
  • When you don’t handle your emotions, they’re going to make their way out as anger, pornography, drugs, or some other vice.
  • If you can’t learn to process your emotions, how can you expect to lead your family through their difficult feelings?
  • Don’t try to fix your weaknesses. Manage weaknesses and leverage strengths. This applies to helping your kids too.
  • How you can use video games like Fortnite to motivate your children
  • PVTT (Personal Value Tied to Task) is fundamental to motivation.
  • If you understand the value of what you’re doing, staying motivated is easy.
  • Balancing the 4 Vital Signs of Fulfillment–internal, relational, physical, and professional. When you balance these properly, it’s easy to walk through life.
  • If you’re not motivated enough as a dad, it’s because you don’t see the value in it.
  • Action=Outcome. Keep action and outcome connected so the steps you take now make sense.
  • Everyone has 1 of 3 motivational catalysts.
  • When you catch yourself falling back into a bad habit, instead of feeling shameful, be grateful that you caught yourself.
  • Gratitude reveals growth. In a grateful state, you will always see opportunity.
  • Don’t do anything that is not important. Ask yourself, what’s the value to you for taking this action?
  • Don’t use motivation to manipulate. Help others get what they want in order to get what you want.
  • Get Matt’s PODGIFT! 

MENTIONED EPISODES

Start Reaching Your Goals with an Accountability Partner

How to Fix Your Unhappy Marriage with Seth and Melanie Studley


Protect your kids with the Bark App

cyberbullying

sexual content

suicidal ideation

online predators


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Matt Granados’s Links

LivePulseInc PODGIFT (Free Stuff)!

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the dad edge

The Dad Edge Mailbox for May 2019


We’re going to do something new for Thursday Throwdown. I receive a lot of emails from listeners, so in this episode I’m going to answer three questions from The Dad Edge mailbox. Send your email to support@gooddadproject.com and your question might be featured in the next show!

Today we’re going to cover three topics:

  1. How to get a child to listen and obey without yelling.
  2. How to stay motivated when you’re in a funk.
  3. How to start a side-hustle without sacrificing family time.

My son is two years old and he is currently at the stage where he is not listening. He’s actively trying to ignore us when asked to do things. He seems to respond immediately if my voice gets raised and I yell, although I don’t like raising my voice and I don’t want to make a habit of doing it. Any tips? — Ben

  • If you want kids to listen, get down on their level, touch them on the shoulder and look them in the eyes when you speak to them
  • Nobody likes being told what to do, even kids. Empower them by forcing them to make decisions. Give them a choice of how or when to do whatever it is they are refusing to do.

How do you tackle a slump of motivation and bring yourself back into focus?

  1. Give yourself grace for being in a slump. You’ll make it worse by beating yourself up about it.
  2. Remind yourself of what is it your chasing. What is your desired end-goal? What will you feel like once you accomplish it?
  3. Make a plan to jump back in. Remind yourself by looking at your map of what you need to do. The best time to take action is now.
  4. Find someone you can partner up with for accountability.

Do you have any suggestions on a side hustle or part time job that won’t take time away from my family?

  • Ask yourself, what do you like doing? You’ll be spending a lot of time working on it. Make sure it’s something you like.
  • Audit your time. It may feel like you don’t have enough time to develop a side-business, but how many hours are you spending watching Netflix?
  • We do more before 8 a.m. than the rest of the world if we wake up a few hours early. You can rack up 10 or 12 hours per week to devote to your new business this way. That’s 40 hours a month—a whole work week!
  • Think about ways to develop passive income that require minimal time and attention, like real estate investments.

Have a question for The Dad Edge? Send it to support@gooddadproject.com.

 


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