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self care for dads

Self-Care for Dads

When we become fathers, we have be in charge of caring for our families. We must step up and provide for them, protect them, and lead them. Fatherhood is an opportunity to become our best selves, but we can’t show up if we don’t invest in our physical, mental, and intellectual wellbeing.

Today we have everyday dad and Dad Edge Alliance member Eric Martinez on the show. He is the founder of Be Well Dad and is dedicated to helping men become their best selves, enabling them to give more to their families and lead on a confident and competent level.

Eric’s been with his wife for sixteen years and is the dad of a five-year-old son and a two-year-old daughter. He talks about how he and his wife overcome the most difficult obstacles, how he got out of his dad bod rut by losing 40 pounds, and how he steps off the hamster wheel of busyness to make time for self-care.

“Fatherhood is an opportunity. It’s an opportunity to show up in the best way you can. It’s an opportunity to influence the next generation of human beings.”—Eric Martinez

 

What You’ll Learn

  • Often spouses think their marriage problems are because of the other person when it’s themselves.
  • As challenges arise you must work as a team with your spouse.
  • There is nothing you can do better on your own.
  • How to make a decision as a family on how you will approach life
  • The family unit is bigger than all problems.
  • How to deal with emotionally sensitive children
  • Validating your kids’ feelings
  • How to support a spouse who suffers from mental illness
  • How CBD helped Eric and his wife mentally and physically
  • What he did to lose 40 pounds
  • The false narratives we create around being busy
  • What fitness will do for your sex life

MENTIONED EPISODES

Communication Mastery for Fathers with Chris Voss

Running Your Family as a Team with Marc Roberge from O.A.R.


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overcoming adversity

How Overcoming Adversity Can Make You a Better Dad with Nick Dinardo

Nick Dinardo draws on adversity to inform and inspire his life as a podcaster, personal performance coach, author, and dad.

Nick Dinardo is an entrepreneur, a consultant, and a public speaker who focuses on resilience, personal growth, and education. Nick is the author of bestselling book The Game of Adversity: 8 Practices to Turn Life’s Toughest Moments into Your Greatest Opportunities. He is also the host of The Sweet Adversity Podcast and has interviewed hundreds of experts on overcoming adversity, dealing with trauma and stress, and the critical role it plays in our cognitive development.

Nick has dealt with adversity his entire life. At the age of seven, his family went from the American dream to a foreclosed home, divorce, and mental illness. He spent a year sleeping on the floor in a one room apartment where his family shared a kitchen with seventeen other families.

Nick had a great dad, but was angry at his father for not understanding his mom and her mental illness. He still hoped and dreamed his parents would fall in love again, but that never happened. They moved from place to place until his mom got her life back together. During this disruptive time, Nick turned to sports for role models of those who went through hard times and still became great, successful people.

Sports is a microcosm of life

Nick Dinardo’s book, The Game of Adversity, uses sports as a Trojan horse to explore the psychological aspects of adversity and how high performers focus on process, not outcome. Coaches like John Wooden and Bill Belichick implemented this idea in their methods. Wooden made his players adhere to a very strict routine and told them not to think about basketball outside of practice. Belichick didn’t care about the score so much as he did about the team and their cognitive skill development. If the players prepared through the process, the win would come without consciously focusing on the goal.

Focusing on goals can make us unhappy

Goals are anti-presence because you’re focused on the end instead of what’s going on right in front of you. You can’t enjoy the moment because you’re always looking to the future, but you can establish a new norm for yourself and stop waiting till you reach any of your goals to be happy.

We have a choice

Men have evolved to be very results-focused, and we feel like a failure when we don’t achieve our goals. This creates stress and our response effects our cortisol levels, which effects our sleep and the function of our bodies. It triggers a chain reaction that goes all the way into how we treat people and how we approach our day.

Fighting our natural instincts to relentlessly push for our goals is tough, but when faced with a stressful situation, we can actually train ourselves how to respond in a positive proactive way instead of a negative reactive way.

Kids overcoming adversity

Nick says what’s important for kids to overcome extreme adversity is a positive relationship with one adult. Despite the hardship his family went through when he was young, he had a solid social circle of caring adults that acted as a foundation of strength.

Dad wisdom after a childhood of adversity

Nick Dinardo is the new dad of a 5-month-old boy. When Nick thinks about the things his father did for him, one thing stands out. It comes down to love. He remembers his dad always gave him hugs in kisses, even in front of his friends. His dad always told him he loved him multiple times a day. Nick says not to worry about the parenting books and the latest trends. When it comes to being a good dad, all things fall into place from love.

RESOURCES

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Get a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

 

Connect with Nick Dinardo

FREE gift for GDP listeners! Click here for your Adversity Toolbox.

Website – NickDinardo.com

Amazon – The Game of Adversity: 8 Practices To Turn Life’s Toughest Moments Into Your Greatest Opportunities

The Sweet Adversity Podcast

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