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art of masculinity

The Art of Masculinity with Johnny Elsasser


If we don’t know who we are or what’s important to us, we will be driven by outside forces and will lack the strength to show up in our lives with purpose and integrity.

This can lead to a feeling of being lost, powerless, trapped, and alone. Worst of all, it can cause us to dislike the man in the mirror—if we can even recognize him at all.

Today’s guest is Johnny Elsasser. He is a former Army Ranger, a men’s leadership coach, and the host of The Art of Masculinity podcast. He is going to tell us how to create a Masculine Blueprint so that we can identify what kind of men we want to become. In living by our own code, we will always know who we are and where we stand.

Feel the power of living as the person you really are.

Johnny Elsasser

John served in the Elite 2nd Battalion 75th Ranger Regiment with 4 combat tours between Iraq and Afghanistan, and protected the U.S. Ambassador to Iraq for 5 years out of Baghdad. He lost his own sense of purpose when he came back to the U.S. full time and became depressed and alone. This emptiness ended in divorce.

Today, John’s found new purpose in starting his own podcast to shed the light of how alpha men struggle and how they can together. He’s been featured in podcasts such as Tuff Love, Destined to Be, Think Yourself Healthy, and others to teach men how to build a strong foundation in authentic masculinity. John Elsasser is truly on a mission to help as many men as possible own their masculinity in the way that honors them.

The Art of Masculinity

Through a quickly evolving world we are living in today, most men were shown at a young age to act, feel, and conduct their lives in a certain way. The Art of Maculinity helps empower men to embrace both forms of energy—the Masculine and Feminine—so that they can step out of their hard shells and create a life where there’s equal strength and toughness while still retaining fluidity and softness.

What You’ll Learn

  • How to transition out of occupations you identify with
  • If you lack direction, you will succumb to dark places.
  • You feel less than others when you don’t know who you are
  • Look into your subconscious. You’re acting on things you didn’t choose.
  • Knowing who you are, you can through anything.
  • Live and pay attention to the journey. You are having experiences you should be enjoying.
  • Drop the ego to evolve.
  • The toxicity of the bravado mentality
  • Your Masculine Blueprint:
    • Where were your values? Do they serve you right now? Keep the ones that still hold true. Get rid of the ones you don’t need anymore.
    • Look at whom you admire. What traits do they have?
    • Combine your old values that still serve you with the new ones you want.
    • Choose 3-5 of these traits to define the man you truly want to be.
  • You will never have regrets if you live as who you are. You will always love the man in the mirror.

Your Masculine Blueprint Challenge

What is your masculine blueprint? Share it on Instagram and tag us @jonnyelsasser and @thedadedge and we’ll share it in our story!


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Personal Evolution Through Trauma with Stefanos Sifandos


How far have you evolved as a person? Are you still struggling with the same issues you’ve had all your life? Are you turning to vices to distract and soothe you? Do you avoid those hard conversations with people who are important to you?

Your relationship with yourself is the foundation of all other aspects of your life, and if you haven’t confronted your demons, you will never be able to take your personal evolution to the next level.

Stefanos Sifandos is a relational alchemist, international speaker, author and change-maker dedicated to helping men create a life of meaning and purpose.

Not long ago, he was egotistical, dishonest, unfaithful, and above all, scared. He discovered that unresolved trauma from his toxic father was unconsciously and destructively influencing his behavior.

Today, Stefanos shares his journey into the depth of pain, and how we can drill to the truth of ourselves to become completely integrated and self-reliant.

He also reveals 6 steps that we can take to process, heal, and expand from the wounds of the past.

“Unconsciously, I used my childhood—my trauma, my wounding—as an excuse to be an asshole.”—Stefanos Sifandos

Stefanos Sifandos

Stefanos is a trained educator and relationships expert with a background in behavioral science. He is passionate about leading people closer to their highest potential and each other.

Stefanos’ philosophy merges the best of eastern and western methodologies to promote spiritual balance and empower people in life and love. From trauma release to navigating the murky waters of modern masculinity, to helping women understand the men in their lives, he helps people escape negative patterns and cultivate a positive sense of self.

Stefanos has worked with thousands of men and women from all walks of life; special forces soldiers, Olympic gold medalists, elite fighters, and everyday people have relied on him to restructure and reframe their relationships with themselves and their loved ones.

What You’ll Learn

  • Stefanos had a tumultuous childhood with a physically and emotionally abusive father.
  • He witnessed his dad and mom have a volatile relationship.
  • His life growing up was full of uncertainty, judgement, control, and pressure.
  • Many of us suppress our childhood memories.
  • Hate, anger, and fear are constrictive. Feeling is freeing, and freedom allows us to expand.
  • How Stefanos grieved his childhood, learned to accept his father, and let go of who he expected him to be.
  • Taking responsibility for dealing with your trauma.
  • Stefanos was hyper-aggressive, arrogant, and egotistical.
  • His business fluctuated and he had volatile relationships.
  • How he became aware of his unhealthy patterns
  • How men can stay on the path of ignorance or become aware and choose a new path
  • How Stefanos used physical challenges to begin growing his self-worth
  • 4 years ago, Stefanos was cleaning toilets and sweeping floors because he didn’t want the commitment of a business.
  • How we use the dopamine from vices to suppress emotions.
  • Other tools men use to cope—avoidance, projecting, codependency, and blame
  • Stefanos says that he had to go through multiple ego deaths to get to where he is.
  • Why “the masculine wants to be empty”
  • The one thing a woman needs most from a man is trustworthiness.
  • We can’t be trustworthy if we don’t do what we say.
  • Why you must have guides and support when you decide to go within.
  • You won’t solve your issues with the same perspective as you developed them.
  • Feeling is your way through the pain.
  • The 6 Step Cyclical Process of Healing
    • Depth-feeling – getting inside your emotions
    • Grounding – pull yourself out, immerse yourself in nature
    • Release – journal, empty your head
    • Reprieve – self-care, healthy pleasure
    • Introspection – stillness and silence
    • Social – reconnecting with friends and loved ones and being seen, respected, and appreciated
  • Why you should talk face to face with your woman.
  • Our issues with other people have little to do with them. We must deepen the connection to ourselves.
  • Confidence is a gate to self-worth.
  • How to improve your confidence level
  • Care less about what people think and more about being true to yourself.

MENTIONED EPISODES:

Why Nice Guys Don’t Get Their Needs Met

No More Mr. Nice Guy with Dr. Robert Glover

 


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living your authentic life

Living Your Authentic Life


Are you living your authentic life? What if you have everything that’s supposed to make you happy and you’re still miserable?

On today’s show, we have Dad Edge Alliance member and everyday dad, Josh Long. Josh had a very successful 16-year career that he hated. He was so hungry for significance in his life, that he threw himself into volunteering for his community. He eventually ran for city council and won. Everything looked very admirable on the outside, but inside he was dying.

Josh was overcommitted and stressed. He began to rely on alcohol to cope. His marriage was in crisis, and he started investing emotionally in another woman. He was living a life of quiet desperation, until he took a hard look at what he was giving his time and energy to and realized he was living for the wrong reasons.

Listen to how Josh saved his marriage, became a better father, and started living a life according to his true values.

“We have to rebuild ourselves before we rebuild our marriages.”—Josh Long, The Dad Edge Alliance

 

RELATED EPISODES:

5 Rules for an Unshakable Marriage

Why Your Ego is the Enemy with Ryan Holiday

How to Stop Being A Miserable F*ck with John Kim


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How to Surrender Your Ego to Supercharge Your Life

How to Surrender Your Ego to Supercharge Your Life


Are you taking ownership of your business, relationships, health, and future? Or are you blaming things outside yourself for a stagnant life? What is preventing you from living as your best self?

It’s the ego.

Most of us don’t want to admit we don’t have it all figured out. We don’t want people to see that we’re vulnerable. We close ourselves to learning when we’re afraid to ask questions. The ego blocks us from growing.

Today we have an everyday dad on the show to talk about how to drill down to your core values and surrender your ego to supercharge your life.

MENTIONED EPISODE: How to Optimize the 5 Dimensions of Manhood


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Using Work to Avoid Home Life

Are You Using Work to Avoid Home Life?


Being a father and husband is full of challenges. Sometimes we feel overwhelmed and unsure of how to handle problems at home. We have the urge to get away. It’s easier to keep busy with work and focus on providing rather than wrestling with the day to day issues of family life.

Today’s guest is everyday dad, Jeremy Bennett. He has been married for nineteen years and is the father of two teenage boys. Jeremy is a firefighter who is passionate about his career. Jeremy traveled frequently and became involved in the world of firefighting as a leader. He lived for the adrenaline and action in his life.

As his sons grew up, Jeremy knew he wasn’t present in his role as a father. His way of dealing with tough times was to leave. One day had a wake up call and realized he needed to find a way to balance work and family life. Now he tries to help other young firefighters do the same.

 


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