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digital distraction

How to Raise Indistractable Kids with Nir Eyal


Digital distraction is a critical problem for parents today. It seems like social media, tech, and video games are hijacking our kids’ lives, but what if the amount of time our kids spend on devices is a symptom of a much deeper issue?

Today we have Nir Eyal on The Dad Edge Podcast. He is a professor at Stanford’s Graduate School of Business and the author of international bestseller, Hooked—How to Build Habit-Forming Products. His upcoming book, Indistractable—How to Control Your Attention and Choose Your Life, is a guidebook for getting the best of tech without letting it get the best of us.

Nir Eyal knows better than anyone about how people get sucked into the rabbit hole of digital distraction, but what he’s going to tell us today will blow your mind. Listen as he outlines the psychology of distraction and how to address the true source of the problem so that kids don’t feel the need to overuse technology.

It’s not about what you’re doing, it’s if you planned to do it.—Nir Eyal

Nir Eyal

Nir Eyal became acutely aware of the problem of digital distraction after his daughter was born. He remembers some of her first words were, “iPad time! iPad time!” After many years helping companies make habit-forming products, he struggled with the idea of parenting in this age of distraction.

This drove him to research all he could find on the topic of distraction and technology. Nir was surprised to find out that the information propagated in the media did not align with the academic research. The tech companies weren’t the villains like most people thought. It was our own lack of “psychological nutrients.”

From then on, Nir’s mission was to learn and teach how to be an indistractable parent and raise indistractable kids.

What You’ll Learn

  • What makes a habit-forming technology?
  • The difference between a habit and an addiction
  • The “hook” business model: Trigger, action, reward, investment
  • How companies understand what makes you tick and click better than you know yourself
  • How to “hack back” and put tech in its place
  • The difference between traction and distraction
    • When an activity is aligned with your values, it’s traction
    • When it’s not, it’s distraction
  • The internal and external triggers that prompt us to take action
  • How all human motivation is geared to avoid discomfort
  • The root of all distraction: kids trying to avoid psychologically uncomfortable situations
  • How to give your kids the tools to fight distraction themselves
  • Why it’s not the tech’s fault that you or your kids are distracted
  • The 4 steps to become indistractable
    • Master internal triggers
    • Make time for traction
    • Hack back external triggers
    • Make pre-commitments to prevent distraction
  • Why we do things we know we shouldn’t do and avoid things that are in our best interest
  • The psychological nutrients children need for mental well-being: a sense of mastery, autonomy, and relatedness
  • If they don’t receive psychological nutrients in the real world, they will look for them in the virtual world
  • How video games give kids a sense of mastery
  • How free play is a record lows
  • The myth of the rebellious teenager
  • How free play with peers develop children’s sense of relatedness
  • How to set tech boundaries together with your kids
  • How to get kids to enforce their own rules around tech
  • Why you don’t just want to raise a rule follower, but a kid who can make the best decisions for themselves.
  • At what age kids should be allowed to go on social media
  • How to know if your kids are ready for certain to technology
  • How to prioritize kids’ time for free play with friends in the real world by teaming up with likeminded parents
  • How free play prevents anxiety and depression
  • Why parents have to walk the walk themselves
  • How we are sabotaging ourselves by blaming tech companies for taking over our brains

MENTIONED EPISODES

Digital Minimalism with Cal Newport

Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less with Greg McKeown

Parents’ Guide to Video Game Addiction with Cam Adair

 


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Nir Eyal’s Links

nirandfar.com

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Twitter

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your super powers

Seeking Your Super Powers with Dr. Richard Shuster


What’s holding you back from becoming your best self?

What about your environment is keeping you from growing?

How can you assess your life and your abilities to discover your super powers?

Today we have Dr. Richard Shuster on the show. He is a Clinical Psychologist, Information Technology Expert, founder of a non-profit called Every Kid Rocks, and the host of The Daily Helping Podcast.

Dr. Shuster shares the story of the near fatal crash that radically shifted his aim in life. He discusses the destructive “trophy case” effect of the internet and what parents should and should not share about their family life on social media.

He also talks about how to create an environment that forces you to grow and how to do a comprehensive assessment of your life so that you can use your super powers to be part of the change process for others.

If the people around you are not singing the message you need to hear, then you need to change your circle.—Dr. Richard Shuster

 

 

Dr. Richard Shuster

In his early twenties, Richard Shuster was the Executive Director for an Information Technology consulting firm where he provided solutions for such clients as the United States Army, state agencies, and Fortune 500 companies. He had no interest in a wife and kids. He was after the dollar and believed he was on his way to becoming the next Tony Stark. It was everything he wanted, or so he thought.

One ordinary Saturday, Richard was in a near-fatal crash that broke his spine. The recovery process was long and grueling. During this period, he had time to reflect. He imagined if he had died and how his parents would react when they got that call. When he thought about this scene, he was filled with shame. He hadn’t accomplished anything meaningful in his life.

This lead him on the path to helping people in a larger way by doing social work and pursuing degrees in psychology to help abused children. He also began The Daily Helping Podcast, which is helping people to become the best version of themselves. He’s now married with two boys and committed to a life of service.

On top of that, Dr. Richard Shuster runs Every Kid Rocks, a charity that gives kids an extra little push to reach their full potential. He also has launched MARS Industries, a firm that offers personal and corporate assessments that transform lives.

What You’ll Learn

  • How his accident wiped away the layers of nonsense in his life
  • His mission to be part of the change process for others
  • His insights as a dad from working with sexually and physically abused children
  • How his podcast will leave hundreds of hours of his legacy behind for his sons
  • The deceptive “trophy case” persona people curate for the internet
  • How those who post the most self-aggrandizing content on social media are the least happy
  • How technology hinders our personal growth
  • How we create an online world that reinforces our viewpoint, even when it’s wrong
  • How this restricts our cognitive flexibility, preventing us from learning and growing
  • How to use social media without getting into the comparison trap
  • What about your personal and family life is appropriate to post on social media
  • Why you and your spouse must agree on boundaries about posting family pictures on the internet
  • How mirror neurons attract us to certain people
  • The miracle story of Richard’s son and how they overcame his developmental challenges
  • Why we need to break free from the grind and pursue something greater so our kids won’t settle for unhappiness
  • His 21 dimensional psychological assessment that will give you a report on how successful you are in life overall

DISCOVER YOUR SUPER POWERS. GET YOUR ASSESSMENT!


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Dr. Richard Shuster’s Links

The Powers Assessment

Every Kid Rocks

Facebook

Twitter

Instagram

The Daily Helping Podcast

Resources

Fill out an application for The Dad Edge Alliance

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

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We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

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Digital Minimalism with Cal Newport


Today’s show is about distraction. Tech can be our best friend and worst enemy. Our devices are no longer normal telephones. They’ve become our constant companions. Texts, emails, social media and loads of content compete for our attention every hour of the day. We are more distracted and overwhelmed than ever before. It not only affects our work life but can do irreparable damage to our family life as well. Will our kids grow up missing their parents who are always on their phone?

Cal Newport is a bestselling author and the father of three boys. You won’t find him on any social media, because he doesn’t have any. He the author of six books, including, most recently, the New York Times bestseller, Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy World.

Cal is going to tells us how tech is engineered to keep us on our phones and steal time away from our lives. He also talks about how it affects our memory and anxiety levels. Cal teaches us what boundaries to set for screen time with our kids and gives us a 30-Day plan to step away from tech and rebuild our digital lives in a way that serves us.

Don’t waste another minute being distracted from the things that are most important to you.

If you demonstrate to your kids that you’re always on the phone, there is damage from that.

 

Cal Newport and Digital Minimalism

Minimalism is the art of knowing how much is just enough. Digital minimalism applies this idea to our personal technology. It’s the key to living a focused life in an increasingly noisy world.

Digital minimalists are all around us. They’re the calm, happy people who can hold long conversations without furtive glances at their phones. They can get lost in a good book, a woodworking project, or a leisurely morning run. They can have fun with friends and family without the obsessive urge to document the experience. They stay informed about the news of the day, but don’t feel overwhelmed by it. They don’t experience “fear of missing out” because they already know which activities provide them meaning and satisfaction.

Common sense tips, like turning off notifications, or occasional rituals like observing a digital sabbath, don’t go far enough in helping us take back control of our technological lives, and attempts to unplug completely are complicated by the demands of family, friends and work.

Cal Newport shows how digital minimalists are rethinking their relationship to social media, rediscovering the pleasures of the offline world, and reconnecting with their inner selves through regular periods of solitude. He then shares strategies for integrating these practices into your life, starting with a thirty-day “digital declutter” process that has already helped thousands feel less overwhelmed and more in control.

Technology is intrinsically neither good nor bad. The key is using it to support your goals and values, rather than letting it use you.

 

It was much more recently than we remember that we were reprogrammed into a relationship with our phone where we look at it all the time.

What You’ll Learn

  • The unintentional consequences of technology in the workplace, and the scarier and more impactful consequences to our personal lives
  • How the smartphone of today was not what Steve Jobs had intended
  • How today’s internet culture is the outcome of business model (Facebook) to reengineer apps so that people want to take their phone out of their pockets all the time.
  • How as our economy shifts toward knowledge work, one of the most important skills is to concentrate and any company who makes focus a priority will have the upper hand
  • Preserving and practicing the ability to concentrate
  • What constant screen time does to our memory
  • How screen time affects our ability to do spatial location
  • How it affects our ability to concentrate even when we’re not on the internet
  • How tech deprives us of insights and self-reflection
  • What it does to our anxiety levels
  • How solitude is a maintenance mode for our brain
  • How up until 10 years ago, we had many moments alone with our own thoughts
  • Your brain can always be processing info from other minds
  • Our hardware is not equipped to handle the constant processing of information from other minds
  • To extract insight from content for your own life, you need time to think about the information
  • How setting a 1 to 1 ratio of content intake to contemplation to extract 5X more value
  • Is there an ideal number of minutes per day of screen time?
  • Breaking the idea that the phone is what you do when you don’t have anything to do
  • The digital minimalism philosophy
  • Using tech only for big wins on what you really care about
  • Why maximalism is not a winning path
  • Why it’s much better to deal with the problem of your kid being mad for not being allowed to have a phone rather than him being up till 4am playing Fortnite
  • Why boys are more susceptible to game addiction
  • Why girls are more susceptible with social media, leading to self-harm and suicide
  • Why teenagers should not get cell phones
  • The “phone foyer” method
  • What can parents do when their kids will not get off the phone
  • Teaching kids how to build a good day instead of using the phone
  • Teaching them high friction activities, like mastering an instrument or sport
  • Cal Newport’s 30-Day Plan to digital minimalism
  • Examples of what kind of apps serve you and which do not
  • The leisure renaissance that makes it easier to participate in high quality activities
  • Simplest thing to do take all apps off the phone. Don’t save your passwords. Use your computer a designated time
  • Leaving a legacy, memories, experiences by putting the phones down
  • Cal Newport’s upcoming book, A World Without Email

 

MENTIONED EPISODES:

The Mask of Masculinity with Lewis Howes

Everything You Need to Know About Identity Theft with Barry Russel

 


Like the show? Leave an iTunes review.

If you’re enjoying the show, we encourage you to leave an itunes review.
We read reviews on the show every week. The next one might be yours!
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Cal Newports’s links

Website

Amazon

Resources

Fill out an application for The Dad Edge Alliance

Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

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Drowning in Distraction? Optimize Your Morning Routine

Drowning in Distraction? Optimize Your Morning Routine

We live in a world where we are drowning in distraction. It seems that everything is fighting for our attention. This causes our minds to become over-stimulated and reactionary.

In our last show, Jim Kwik told us how to turn on our superhero brain. In this short episode, I go over the elements he suggested for a morning routine that will optimize our brain for focus and productivity.

  • Don’t check your device
  • Try to remember your dreams
  • Make your bed
  • Brush your teeth with opposite hand
  • Drink water
  • Do deep breathing exercises
  • Take a cold shower
  • Make a brain tea
  • Exercise
  • Gratitude
  • Make a brain power smoothie
  • Create a “not to do” list

Announcement: We are changing the name of the podcast in a couple weeks to the Dad Edge Podcast. There will be no change in the content or the website. You’ll just see the new show name and logo.

In this short episode, I go over the elements @JimKwik suggested for a morning routine that will optimize our brain for focus and productivity. #productivity #digitaloverload #screentime #brainhealth Click To Tweet

 

MENTIONED EPISODES

Turn On Your Superhero Brain with Jim Kwik

We appreciate all the support!

If you’re enjoying the show, we encourage you to leave an itunes review.


Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

 

Links


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join The Dad Edge Alliance

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Turn On Your Superhero Brain with Jim Kwik

Turn On Your Superhero Brain with Jim Kwik


In this modern age, we are bombarded with information and distractions. Our brain is not prepared to handle the constant interruptions from our computers and mobile devices. Do you feel overwhelmed and distracted? Are you agitated and anxious? Then you will get a ton of value from our guest today.

Jim Kwik is the founder of Kwik Learning and is a specialist in speed reading, memory improvement, brain performance, and accelerated learning. He is an advisor to many of the worlds’ CEOs, entrepreneurs, and celebrities. He is also  the host of Kwik Brain podcast, the #1 training show on iTunes, and is the creator of online courses that are used around the world.

Jim Kwik tells us his story from being learning-challenged due to a brain injury to being one of the most sought after learning coaches in the world. He also shares with us how to avoid mental exhaustion and his 10-step morning routine to create optimum brain power!

Today, you’re not paid for your brute strength, but your brain strength. It’s not your muscle power, it’s your mind power. The faster you can learn the faster you can earn. – @JimKwik #learning #success #brain Click To Tweet

Jim Kwik

Jim Kwik suffered and accident that left him with brain damage at age five. He couldn’t focus in school and didn’t understand what was being taught. Teachers had to repeat themselves over and over again until he was so ashamed he had to pretend he was learning. He remembers very clearly overhearing his teacher say to another adult, “that’s the boy with the broken brain.”

But Jim didn’t give up.He had difficulty learning to read, but he was inspired by comic books and the concept that one person could make a difference. Like the super heroes in his favorite stories, he was determined to triumph over his adversity. He devoted himself to solving the riddle of how his brain worked and used his experiences to create strategies to dramatically enhance his mental performance.

He has since dedicated his life to helping others unleash their true genius and brainpower to learn anything faster and live a life of greater power, productivity, and purpose.

If there is one skill to master in the 21st century it's your ability to learn faster. – @JimKwik #technology #performance #brain #productivity Click To Tweet

What You’ll Learn

  • What Jim Kwik does for his high-profile clients like the cast of X-men.
  • Why distraction is not your fault.
  • What is digital overload?
  • What he does to help people have their best and brightest brain.
  • Why your brain is your best wealth-building asset.
  • How our mobile devices train us to be stupid
  • Why you should make your bed every morning
  • When Stan Lee told Jim who his favorite super hero was
  • Why feedback is the breakfast of superheroes
  • The other intelligences that exist besides reading and math, etc.
  • Why dads should teach kids by example NOT to take the easiest route
  • Why mistakes are wonderful
  • How to mold your kid’s self-talk
  • Why novelty and nutrition are essential to your brain
  • Why you should make a “NOT to do” list
  • How your habits create you
  • How being kind to yourself helps you reinforce good behaviors
With kids, it’s one third nature and two thirds nurture. – @JimKwik #parenting #kids #dads #fathers Click To Tweet

We appreciate all the support!

If you’re enjoying the show, we encourage you to leave an itunes review.

Note: We are changing the name of the podcast in a couple weeks to the Dad Edge Podcast. There will be no change in the content or the website, just the new show name and logo!

Connect with Jim Kwik

jimkwik.com

Facebook

Twitter

Instagram

Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Daddy Will Always Love and Protect You

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YES, I AM!

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