“What if we cared as much about the safety of our young people in digital spaces as much as we did in physical spaces.” – Chris McKenna. The internet world in relatively new realm in which prying eyes can weave their way into our children’s lives even more so than in the physical world. We care so much about who our children hang out with, where they’re at on the playground, what time they say they’ll be home. Yet, when it comes to technology, there are very little rules put into place that will protect them from online predators who have nothing but evil intentions.
Chris McKenna, former middle school youth pastor turned business owner, noticed this trend of outdated internet laws for protecting kids and decided to take matters into his own hands. He started the company, Protect Young Eyes, as an online program where parents could ask questions about technology and Chris would educate them on the dangers of the internet. Protect Young Eyes came up with an app as a “pandemic proof” way of presenting this information virtually instead of holding live presentations.
Titania Jordan is the Chief Parenting Officer for a tech company called Bark, which is a company that alerts parents when there are signs of any malicious content on a child’s phone or device. The app protects against cyberbullying, thoughts of suicide, sexual content, potential drug use, online predation, and more. Bark does this by using artificial intelligence and machine learning to alert you of an issue instead of mirroring everything on your child’s phone.
What You’ll Learn:
Protecting Young Eyes
Chris talks about his company Protecting Young Eyes and how the laws that are meant to protect young children from malicious content on the internet are older than social media platforms themselves.
Titania talks about Bark and how it screens out any malicious content from your child’s phone without mirroring every single thing your child is doing order to protect their privacy.
Chris recalls a movie that came out in 2020 called Childhood 2.0 in which kids share about their everyday experiences with cyberbullying, nudes, pressure, anxiety, pornography, etc. Chris says to use this movie as a conversation piece for your children so they can understand the dangers of technology from a child’s point of view.
Social media is not a surrogate for relationships. Chris recalls in the Childhood 2.0 a testimony from parents who lost their son to suicide. They later found on his phone the thoughts and emotions he was going through, yet their son didn’t tell them.
Titania recalls a 9.5 minute video put out by Bark where the company went undercover as multiple personas. One of the personas was an 11 year old girl and adult men began to contact this persona within 90 seconds of posting the profile. These men wanted to meet up with her, solicit photos, and live chat with her.
Bark’s alerts around online predation went up 23% during the pandemic.
Protecting Young Eyes for the Future
Chris talks about protecting young eyes for the future and how the term “parental controls” and how it puts parents in a controlling position. Parental controls are put in place to protect, not control. Be honest with your kids about the dangers of technology so that your kids trust you more.
Too many parents want to control their kids into digital submission.
Tech is a we activity not a me activity.
Titania encourages listeners to watch the movie Childhood 2.0 on Amazon Prime.
https://gooddadproject.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/FIBark.jpg360706Larry Hagnerhttps://gooddadproject.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/GDP-enfold-header-logo.pngLarry Hagner2021-05-09 20:00:402021-05-07 21:35:24Protecting Young Eyes by (Bark)ing at the Dangers with Chris McKenna and Titania Jordan
In this episode of the Dad Edge Podcast, our guest is Dr. Nicole LePera. She was trained in clinical psychology at Cornell University and the New School for Social Research. She also studied at the Philadelphia School of Psychoanalysis.
As a clinical psychologist in private practice, she often found herself frustrated by traditional psychotherapy’s limitations. She began a journey to develop a united philosophy of mental, physical, and spiritual health that equips people with the tools necessary to heal themselves.
Nothing short of a paradigm shift, her teachings empower individuals to break free from trauma cycles and create who they want to become.
Today, she talks with us about how to do the work when it comes to resolving childhood traumas, dealing with anxiety, building resiliency, and becoming a greater example for our children.
How to Do the Work
From Dr. Nicole LePera, creator of “the holistic psychologist”—the online phenomenon with more than two million Instagram followers—comes a revolutionary approach to healing that harnesses the power of the self to produce lasting change.
Now, Dr. LePera is ready to share her much-requested protocol with the world. In How to Do the Work, she offers both a manifesto for SelfHealing as well as an essential guide to creating a more vibrant, authentic, and joyful life. Drawing on the latest research from a diversity of scientific fields and healing modalities, Dr. LePera helps us recognize how adverse experiences and trauma in childhood live with us, resulting in whole body dysfunction—activating harmful stress responses that keep us stuck engaging in patterns of codependency, emotional immaturity, and trauma bonds. Unless addressed, these self-sabotaging behaviors can quickly become cyclical, leaving people feeling unhappy, unfulfilled, and unwell.
In How to Do the Work, Dr. LePera offers readers the support and tools that will allow them to break free from destructive behaviors to reclaim and recreate their lives. Nothing short of a paradigm shift, this is a celebration of empowerment that will forever change the way we approach mental wellness and self-care.
What You’ll Learn
What Brings Dr. Nicole Joy and Happiness?
Being really present in her life is what brings Dr. LePera joy and happiness. Little did she know how she wasn’t present in her life for the better part of 30 years. Receiving, seeing, experiencing, and feeling how it translates into her work is what lights her up.
Dr. Nicole’s Favorite Quote
“Life is lived in moments.” Dr. LePera understood it as a concept, yet she didn’t understand how to practice it. She later realized that she’s now embodying the quote and learning to be present in her moments.
Advice to her Past Self
Gear up for the challenge of growing—challenging personal beliefs embedded in the subconscious and challenging herself to show up differently in the world.
Nicole was born into a family with a lot of anxiety. A lot of worry was present whether it was medical concerns or issues. Anxiety was an implicit part of her childhood experience. It became a large motivator in her desire to understand people.
Dr. Nicole says that a lot of us consider ourselves wounded healers. The way she understands her desire to go into the healing profession is really from that understanding to relieve the symptoms of others.
Anxiety and tension
Anxiety and tension in her family weren’t talked about. It was this inner experience that they were all sharing without labeling it or speaking about it.
Her mother and father’s relationship
Dr. Nicole doesn’t know if she thought about it because it was her normal. This happens to a lot of us. We just see, and we’re modeled relationships which becomes a format for our own personal relationships.
Dr. Nicole would have thought everything was fine and great and close in her parents’ relationship until she realized that she was repeating the same patterns in her relationships. She didn’t necessarily feel that depth of connection.
Relationship with her Father
Her dad was very active in her life. She has many memories of her dad playing with her, and they spent a lot of time together. They had points of connection, but not necessarily in terms of depth and emotion.
Dr. Nicole’s goal for everyone is to hold space and to acknowledge that some of us might come to the realization that our relationship a parent is one in which we need to stop engaging. She can see both sides of understanding and a parent’s limitations because they are humans, too. They were impacted by what they were taught.
Writing her book
Writing a book wasn’t something Dr. Nicole necessarily thought was a need. After the evolution of working as a traditional therapist, she came by this new holistic method that she now uses through her own healing and then began sharing it with others. She was considering the theory and beginning to put it out on Instagram.
Dr. Nicole had an office where people and clients would come week after week. They would have incredibly insightful conversations about all the things that aren’t working in life and all the things they will do differently to manage the symptoms or make their relationships more fulfilling. She had many people who had all of this insight but could not create change in their life.
Many of us are operating from a deeper part of our mind called the subconscious. We are running on almost a blind autopilot. What we’re doing in that unconscious state is repeating all of these habits and patterns that aren’t serving us.
We must gain the tools to begin to create a more conscious, intentional experience of creating a future that’s different from the past.
Bridging the Gap between the subconscious and conscious mind
We need to check and identify how unconscious we are. At that moment, we want to begin to fire up a new part of our brain. We want to teach ourselves how to be present in our given moment. We can access our senses. We can tune in to what’s actually here and hook our attention on that instead of where it typically is for many of us lost in our mind somewhere else.
When something external inflicts a change upon us, we have a chance to go into a new space, a pattern-interrupt where we can become conscious and make new choices in that moment, or we can slide right back into autopilot.
Being Present and Intentional
Outside of using what’s present in our environment, we always have access to our senses. If you are at dinner, instead of focusing on what happens after dinner, you’re focusing on the taste of the food. We can always access the present moment, and it’s a practice.
Emotions feel unsafe for a lot of males in general.
We sit in judgment of our feelings. Some of us have a general belief that feelings, whatever they are, are bad. And that’s not the reality. Feelings are a natural human occurrence.
We can teach ourselves and show ourselves through living the experience of regulating our emotional body through our breath.
We have to practice breath before we really need it. We have to build it into our day. For Dr. Nicole, it begins every morning where she created the intention of just practicing how to breathe from her belly.
Gratitude for many of us is what’s present, and that is often what’s right in front of us.
We now know that our heart is incredibly powerful. Our heart energy not only affects our whole system but communicates with our brain. It affects everyone around us. When we begin embodying these feelings, we can become really powerful in creating our future.
The Inner Child
The deepest part of our subconscious that impacts us into adulthood is the area called our inner child.
We all have childlike parts of ourselves, even though we’re running around in different aged adult bodies. The inner child accumulates things that have happened in such a distant past that they feel so far, yet because we house all of these patterns in our subconscious, and we operate largely through them. Many of us find ourselves into adulthood, repeating some of these older habits and patterns that don’t serve us.
Children are much more receptive to how they’re watching us. Navigating our feelings is going to be so impactful for them. Our brain actually has something called mirror neurons that fire when we’re watching people around us. This includes our emotional experiences.
Modeling into your emotional experiences and expressing them, and letting them out for your children to see usually is going to be the much more impactful way to teach children emotional resilience.
Our brains and our whole bodies really are neuroplastic and are changeable. All of us, whoever we are, as we change, all of the relationships around us change. The beautiful endpoint of this conversation is so much change as possible. Even if you’re a parent with older children, as you begin to do differently, it has so much more of an impact than we realize.
https://gooddadproject.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/TDE-308-How-to-Do-the-Work-with-Nicole-LePera.jpg360706Christa Wojciechowskihttps://gooddadproject.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/GDP-enfold-header-logo.pngChrista Wojciechowski2021-03-07 20:00:262021-03-06 15:53:12How to Do the Work with Dr. Nicole LePera
What are the best ways to build mental resilience? Today’s guest teaches us how to create weird and wonderful challenges to push through resistance and overcome anxiety.
Ben Aldridge is the bestselling author of How to be Comfortable with Being Uncomfortable: 43 Weird & Wonderful Ways to Build a Strong, Resilient Mindset. Ben’s crippling anxiety prevented him from living fully. In his search for a solution, he discovered that the more he tested himself in controlled environments, the more his anxiety diminished. Since then, he continues to push himself by accomplishing the strange and seemingly impossible.
In this episode, Ben explains how to plan mental, physical, and skill-based challenges that will accelerate our growth and develop a tolerance for being uncomfortable. He talks about how we can leave our comfort zones, face our fears, and increase our confidence. He also tells us how we can help our kids build mental resilience with weird and wonderful challenges!
Are you ready to get uncomfortable and build a more resilient mindset?
Ben Aldridge is a writer, teacher and musician from the UK. He writes about practical philosophy, comfort zones, mental health and adventure. His first book “How to Be Comfortable with Being Uncomfortable: 43 Weird & Wonderful Ways to Build a Strong Resilient Mindset” is an exploration of unique ways to leave our comfort zones and face our fears. Heavily influenced by Stoicism, Buddhism, Popular Psychology and CBT, Ben’s challenges encourage us to get uncomfortable and experience the personal growth that we can only gain from pushing ourselves to the limit.
Ben’s interests are extremely diverse. You’ll find him climbing mountains, learning Japanese, running marathons, solving Rubik’s cubes, eating bizarre food, taking ice baths and sleeping in unusual places. The challenges that he sets for himself and his readers are often quirky, fun and demanding.
How to Be Comfortable with Being Uncomfortable: 43 Weird & Wonderful Ways to Build a Strong, Resilient Mindset
After debilitating anxiety and panic attacks began to impact his daily life, Ben Aldridge decided to tackle his mental health issues in a creative way. His journey led him on a year of completing weird and wonderful challenges in the name of self-improvement. By deliberately leaving his comfort zone and enduring difficulties, Ben completely changed his life.
Ice-cold showers, eating repulsive insects, running marathons, sleeping in unusual places, wearing ridiculous clothes and learning to solve the Rubik’s cube in under a minute are some of the ways Ben has pushed his body and mind to learn more, endure more and conquer more.
Varying in length, difficulty and category, Ben explains how to complete each challenge, how it changed his life and how you can push yourself with this practical method of self-development.
From learning a new language to climbing a mountain, see how far you can challenge yourself to overcome your fears and self-imposed limitations.
Packed with useful tips and tricks from Stoicism, Buddhism, CBT and popular psychology, this book encourages us to face our fears, embrace adversity and leave our comfort zones.
What You’ll Learn
The variety challenges Ben has conquered.
Through these challenges, Ben went from a gray, fear-based existence to a colorful life.
The 3 types of challenges you should practice:
Physical (like working up to running a marathon)
Skill-based (like leaving your academic-intellectual comfort zone)
Mental (practicing discomfort, like cold exposure)
Struggling is good for the mind. You should put yourself in frustrating situations.
Pay attention to your thoughts when under stress and anxiety so you can develop strategies for dealing with them.
The stoics of ancient Greece and Rome would deliberately sleep on the floor to practice discomfort. Ben tried “bivvying” where he slept outside in a bag in scary environments.
You receive a boost in confidence each time you conquer a challenge.
Lean into your fears instead of avoiding them.
Why we should look at our anti-bucket list instead of our bucket list
Go where there is huge mental resistance. Ben had acupuncture because he was afraid of needles.
Prepare for chaos and in life because it will come.
These challenges are an insurance policy against future adversity.
How Ben climbed Mount Everest … on his stairs in his home during lockdown. Ben also ran a marathon in his yard.
Start small and break up your routine. Find pockets of time to challenge yourself.
Have something on the calendar you are working towards, like an event to train for.
Bring friends in with you to help with accountability.
Children should see parents step out of their comfort zones.
Inviting your kids to do challenge with you creates a special bond.
Using downtime for adventure instead of TV.
Develop your own system to deal with adversity and anxiety and use challenges as a controlled environment to test these strategies.
https://gooddadproject.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/TDE-280-Weird-Wonderful-Ways-to-Build-Mental-Resilience-with-Ben-Aldridge.jpg360706Christa Wojciechowskihttps://gooddadproject.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/GDP-enfold-header-logo.pngChrista Wojciechowski2020-08-23 20:00:282020-08-20 11:01:49Weird & Wonderful Ways to Build Mental Resilience with Ben Aldridge
Suicide is the number one killer among men aged 35-50. The World Health Organization reports that suicide represents half of all male violent deaths worldwide. Why are men at such risk and what can we do about it?
Men are more likely to go for desperate measures for several reasons. Our culture teaches men to internalize emotions and hide distress. At the same time, men tend to lose their close friends and support systems as they step into the role of a provider. They’re also reluctant to seek help when struggling with anxiety, depression, or suicidal thoughts.
The first step in fighting suicide among men is raising awareness. Today, one of our Dad Edge Alliance Commanders courageously steps up to share his story of surviving suicide.
Nick Sotelo recounts his intense battle against rage, darkness, and suicide. He also tells us how to interrupt the negative scripts that run through our heads and what to do when overwhelmed with shame and hopelessness.
We never know what is going to send us or someone we care about down a dark road. This is an episode every dad should listen to for himself and any boy or man he knows.
https://gooddadproject.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/11/TT-186-SURVIVING-SUICIDE-A-Dads-Story.jpg360706Christa Wojciechowskihttps://gooddadproject.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/GDP-enfold-header-logo.pngChrista Wojciechowski2019-11-27 20:00:152019-11-27 16:02:49Surviving Suicide: A Dad’s Story
We obsess over nutrition and fitness for a strong physique, but we ignore the most important organ in the body—the brain. The brain manages every function of the human body and is also in charge of our focus, mood, and ability to learn.
In this episode of The Dad Edge, America’s Most Popular Psychiatrist, Dr. Daniel Amen, talks about how we can improve the lives of ourselves and our children by making the brain a priority. He tells us how to eat to optimize brain power, how to create a bedtime routine for the best sleep, and how to stop the negative thoughts and behaviors that sabotage our progress in life.
This show will transform the way you think, literally. Prepare to Change Your Brain, Change Your Life!
Get the brain right and your mind will follow.–Dr. Daniel Amen
Dr. Daniel Amen
“Dr. Amen believes that brain health is central to all health and success. His work is dedicated to helping people have better brains and better lives.
Patients love him…viewers worship him…and thousands of people say they owe their lives to Dr. Amen.
His health clinics across the country see over 4,000 patient visits each month and continue to grow. And his breakthrough public television programs on various issues of brain and mental health have aired over 80,000 times and have been watched by millions of people.
He is a distinguished fellow of the American Psychiatric Association, and as a pioneer in brain SPECT imaging, he introduced a whole new way of looking at the brain. His research on brain imaging was ranked #19 out of the top 100 stories in science in 2015 by Discover Magazine.
Dr. Amen is a #1 New York Times best-selling author, double board-certified psychiatrist, professor and brain health expert.”
Your brain is involved in everything you do, every decision you make, and everything you are. And when your brain works right, you work right.–Dr. Daniel Amen
What You’ll Learn
How Dr. Amen went from average C student to graduating medical school
Depression and suicide increase with inadequate sleep.
The brain washes itself and consolidates information from the day during sleep
More people die on the road from sleep deprivation than alcohol.
How to honor a child’s circadian rhythm
Using a light box to reset your kids’ circadian rhythm to wake up early
How ADD kids are usually night owls
How to create a calming routine for your kids, engaging all 5 senses with relaxation before bedtime
Getting your kids to fall in love with their brains
How gadgets keep us awake by flooding us with blue light
The more secure the attachment to your kids, the safer they feel and the better they sleep.
How to bond with your child by spending 20 minutes each day listening to your him/her without giving your opinion.
The best brain breakfasts
Why eggs are the perfect food
The great cholesterol myth
How very low levels of cholesterol are associated with mental illness
Finding foods you love that love you back
Amen’s house rule: never spend money on food that will harm the kids
Getting your kids to eat brain healthy foods
Teaching kids to read food labels
When blood sugar is low, blood flow to your frontal lobe is slow.
Healthy snacks for after school
Why apple juice is a bad food
The truth about dairy
How most people don’t have the enzyme to process lactose (dairy sugar)
Healthy Brain Diet: 70% plants 30% healthy protein and a lot of healthy fats
Cultures who eat the most fish have the least depression.
The younger you start giving children fish, the better.
Preparing the brain for learning
How to proactively get ready for class to reduce study time and increase retention
Studying the day’s lesson before class to ask smarter questions
How and why kids should make an effort to develop a good relationship with teachers
Why interacting in a group setting is so helpful in learning
How to limit distractions and reward yourself for staying focused
Why it’s crucial to define your life and what you want for all aspects of it
How to ensure your behavior fits the goals you have
Consistent thinking or acting over time gets you what you want.
Why you must base your activities around what will matter most in the future
The smallest, most effective thing you can do today is to ask yourself, “Is the consequence of this decision the best for my brain?”
Whenever you feel sad, mad, or out of control, write your feelings down and question the negative thinking.
https://gooddadproject.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/11/TDE-239-Change-Your-Brain-Change-Your-Life-with-Dr.-Daniel-Amen.jpg360706Christa Wojciechowskihttps://gooddadproject.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/GDP-enfold-header-logo.pngChrista Wojciechowski2019-11-03 20:00:412019-12-23 13:16:29Change Your Brain, Change Your Life with Dr. Daniel Amen