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habit stacking

Habit Stacking to Reach Your Goals

The Dad Edge podcast usually features the most inspirational thought leaders of today, but our listeners have also been telling us that they enjoy our shorter episodes interviewing the everyday-dads who are trying to grow.

Today we have Nick Elkins on the show. He has been a long-time member of The Dad Edge Alliance and is our finance guy. He is a 30-year-old happily married father of three. He talks about how he used habit stacking to reach his goals of losing weight, managing anger, and growing his finances so he can retire in his 40s!

'Being around a bunch of men who are all hungry for change has been instrumental in making stuff happen.' – Nick Elkins #men #dadlife #dads #fathers #mastermind #selfimprovement Click To Tweet

MENTIONED EPISODES:

How to Master Anger Management

Wild at Heart with John Eldredge


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If you’re enjoying the show, we encourage you to leave an itunes review.
We read reviews on the show every week. The next one might be yours!
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Nick’s Links

teachmykidsmoney.com

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Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


Create an Epic Life

join The Dad Edge Alliance

CLICK HERE!

Dad Edge Alliance

Wild at Heart with John Eldredge

Wild at Heart with John Eldredge

The Dad Edge Podcast is honored beyond words to have John Eldredge on the show. He is the author of the bestselling book Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man’s Soul and is here to talk about our core needs as men and our constant quest for validation.

He also shares life-changing insights on how to become a student of our child’s heart and interpret their experiences for them so that they can become happier, stronger adults.

 

On being a dad: 'It’s not about perfection. It’s about love.' – John Eldredge @ransomedheart #dads #fathers #fatherhood #parenting Click To Tweet

What You’ll Learn

  • The inspiration for John Eldredge’s book, Wild at Heart
  • How we are in the midst of the collapse of gender
  • Why guys are confused on what it means to be a man
  • How men can be restored by doing internal work
  • Why most men don’t know they have a genuine strength to offer the world
  • How most of us ‘fake it’ through life, but inside, we doubt who we are
  • What things men are compensating for
  • Why men are so afraid to fail
'The number one ingredient for a child's success is having a dad who cares and who is involved.' – John Eldredge @ransomedheart #dads #fathers #fatherhood #parenting Click To Tweet
  • What it means to be a student of your child’s heart and why you need to become one
  • How to start giving your kids low-grade challenges to build their confidence
  • How to also implement low-grade failures so they can discover that they will survive through setbacks
  • How looking to your kid as a source of personal validation is damaging
  • How to wire your parenting for each child
  • How to be a dad to daughters
  • How a father defines his daughters identity
  • What a father can do to ensure his daughter trusts masculine strength
  • What to do when you blow up and anger
  • How to not let your child’s feelings turn into ‘agreements’ or negative conclusions about life
  • How to take the power of validation away from high-pressure situations
'A man will design his entire life to avoid anything that might expose him, and to only stay in the areas where he is getting some validation.' – John Eldredge @ransomedheart #men #dads #fathers #masculinity #comfortzone #fear… Click To Tweet

We appreciate all the support!

If you’re enjoying the show, we encourage you to leave an itunes review.

We read a review on the show each week. The next one could be yours!

 


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John Eldredge’s Links

Website

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Visit SLOWMAG.COM/GOODDAD

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THE DAD EDGE SUMMIT 2018

JUNE 7TH – 9TH – ST. LOUIS

Are you an extraordinary father looking to accelerate in all aspects of your life?
Are you looking to connect to like-minded Dads that want to come together to strengthen and grow in their abilities both personally and professionally?
The Dad Edge 2018 Summit (Live Event) will set you up to do exactly that.

LEARN MORE


Resources

The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


Create an Epic Life

join The Dad Edge Alliance

CLICK HERE!

Dad Edge Alliance

Using the Past to Become a Better Dad with Former NFL Player Billy Miller

Using the Past to Become a Better Dad with Former NFL Player Billy Miller

Today we are psyched to have Former NFL player and Super Bowl Champion Billy Miller on The Dad Edge Podcast. Most of the time we only see sports stars on the field or getting interviewed after the game. They have to give their camera-ready answers about the team’s performance, but rarely do we see the husband, the father, or the man behind the athlete.

In this episode, Billy Miller opens up his world to us. He delves into his rough childhood as the son of two drug addicts, his battle against depression, and how he uses his difficult past as a reference to become the best dad he can possibly be. He also talks about maintaining a circle of intimate friends, co-parenting with his ex-wife, and how he keeps work separate from his family.

'We are built, as men, to change.' – former NFL Player, Billy Miller @billymiller83 #men #dads #fathers #fatherhood #manhood Click To Tweet

Billy Miller

From the time Billy can remember, his parents were addicted to drugs. He’d wake up on a Saturday morning, make himself breakfast, lunch, dinner, go to bed, wake up, and do the same thing all over again for days. Billy was alone a lot and had to learn to take care of himself. He was forced to grow up quickly.

Billy’s dad was abusive to his mom and him. He also went to prison several times. Billy didn’t think anything of it because it became his normal.

As he got older, Billy moved to a much nicer area called West Lake Village. His new school was a total culture shock and a blessing for him. Billy is half white and half black, but he had never spoken a word to another white person except to his mom and his grandmother until he was thirteen-years-old.

In West Lake Village, Billy saw how parents could get along and how healthy families functioned. He realized very early how important being a father was. He noticed that every single word his father said resonated within him. He held onto this realization until he became a dad himself.

'It's those moments where you're becoming a reflection of your past that you know you're doing the best learning of what not do to as a father.' – former NFL Player, Billy Miller @billymiller83 #dads #fathers #men #fatherhood #legacy Click To Tweet

What You’ll Learn

  • How Billy suffered a bout of deep depression after he was done playing football
  • How depression helped him develop humility
  • What you need in addition to the desire to change
  • How we as men be better at asking for help
  • How to be honest about how you feel with your kids
  • How to show your kids how to be vulnerable
  • How being competitive lessens the chances of a man’s success
  • The trusted and honest relationship he had with his tribe of intimate friends
  • How to start a men’s group
  • How to deepen relationships with existing friends to go beyond the ordinary
  • About Billy’s divorce
  • How he coparents with his ex-wife
  • How couples can coparent peacefully and successfully even if they don’t get along
  • Why he didn’t talk to his brother for a long time
  • Why he hates when dads are not involved
  • How to not bring stress home to your kids, even when under the pressure of a job like playing in the NFL
  • How to come home and be superman
'Don't wait till the last minute. Don't wait to the bottom of the bottom to ask for help.'– former NFL Player, Billy Miller @billymiller83 #men #depression #stress #mentalhealth Click To Tweet

We appreciate all the support!

If you’re enjoying the show, we encourage you to leave an itunes review.


Billy Miller’s Links

Twitter

Instagram

'Being a dad was vastly more important than anything I was doing.' – former NFL Player, Billy Miller @billymiller83 #dads #fathers #sports #NFL #parenting Click To Tweet

Resources

The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


Create an Epic Life

join The Dad Edge Alliance

CLICK HERE!

Dad Edge Alliance

How to Get Your Kid to Listen Without Yelling

I’m going to talk about an issue most dads face on a daily basis–losing our temper. What do you do when you tell your son or daughter to do something over and over again and they just won’t listen? Usually we get frustrated and angry. We begin to raise our voice, but this doesn’t give us the respect we want. Today I’m going to share a secret I learned from a mentor on how to get your kid to listen without yelling.


Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


Create an Epic Life

join The Dad Edge Alliance

CLICK HERE!

Dad Edge Alliance

How to Argue with Your Spouse with Peter Sacco

Most of us men have a tendency to accumulate build-up of anger and emotions. It’s easy for us to lose our temper and let a discussion turn into an argument. When we are angry, we can’t think logically. This is when we’re endanger of saying things or behaving in ways we regret towards our partner. Today, Peter Sacco is back on the show to tell you how to argue with your spouse without drama, anger, and resentment.

The most common problems with anger and fighting

It may sound cliche, but most anger problems arise from lack of communication, or poor quality communication. When a couple first meets, the guy tends to be the pursuer, and will tell the woman everything and anything to get her attention. A new couple can’t make enough time to spend together and they talk about everything.

Months, years, decades later, the conversation becomes mundane and repetitive. They think they have nothing to learn about each other anymore. They stop asking questions. It’s not just communication, it’s the quality of it. Simply put, anger and fighting result from procrastination, laziness, redundancy, complacency. It’s important to have the skills to bring up difficult subjects before they fester and blow up or silently destroy the relationship.

Getting out of the rut

How can we be more comfortable with being proactive and less complacent when it comes to things that are hard for us to talk about? At the beginning, when we’re intimate with somebody, we maintain boundaries. We hide a lot. As the relationship progresses, we start to release more and more stuff. We may not have farted or swore in front of our spouse at first, then we gradually let it go. We stretch those boundaries, and a couple must be willing to accept new things learned about each other and adapt.

Part of love is unconditional. People change and evolve. One partner may have grown, while the other one has remained the same. Two people have to refind each other.

How to argue without anger

What are the rules and boundaries for a disagreement between a couple? First of all, don’t have a meaningful or deep discussion if you’re angry. It won’t go anywhere or make it worse. Go away and cool off before talking about what’s upsetting you.

Power plays that will kill your communication, and ultimately, your marriage.

There are two ways couples use to overpower or manipulate each other.

Gunny sacking – Gunny sacking is the storing up of grievances and using them at a later date to try to get even. It’s a passive aggressive type of anger, and a way of reaching in and tearing out someone’s heart strings. Rather than address it rationally when you not so angry, you waiting for it to let it go, like a bomb.

Belt lining–  Belt lining is trying to gain power over the argument by being louder or physically intimidating. This can be done by raising the voice, screaming, yelling, or pounding fists. On the other end of the spectrum, crying or threatening self-harm can be used to manipulate the other person.

How to Walk Away from the Anger

How do we walk away saying, “I’m not going to talk about this right now,” without pissing someone off? You have to assume responsibility for your thoughts feelings and reactions. You can’t control how the other person is going to react. But you can be more detrimental by walking away. If someone storms off without a word, they are shutting down the argument and assuming control. This might leave the other person more hurt and angry.

Peter Sacco says that if you feel the anger welling up, say something like, “Right now I’m angry and I’m not thinking straight. I may say things I don’t mean, and you deserve better. I’m just going to go away and cool off.” In this way, you’ve assumed responsibility for your feelings, you’ve said it with integrity and dignity, and that’s the best you can do. Most people will say thank you in this case, and you’ll avoid a destructive blowout.

Low-blows 

What about couples who have a long history of name-calling or hitting below the belt? In a perfect world, both individuals would agree to fix the problem and get counseling. They would make sure they did not fight in front of the kids.

What do you do when you’re being verbally abused by your spouse? Look at the person who is calling you names. Turn it around and say, Thank you. That’s different. Are you talking dirty to me? Are you flirting? The person is going to be thrown from their axis. Their conditioned response will not be able to happen. They have to rethink what they’re saying. You shut down triggers for both of you.

Are Couples Supposed to Communicate Everything?

Two people who’ve been together for a long time will inevitably get on each other’s nerves. Are we really supposed to confront our partner about all the little things that drive us crazy?

Peter Sacco says that before broaching any touchy subject, take your emotions into account. Ask yourself, am I in a good place to have this discussion? Can my partner handle this right now? Don’t bring up a difficult conversation this before bed when you’re both tired. Don’t try it first thing in the morning before work. It could derail the whole day. Timing is everything.

Doomed Relationships

Are there relationships and marriages that are beyond help?  Peter Sacco says that if both people in the relationship are in denial that there is a problem and think there isn’t anything to be fixed, they are in trouble. Also, some couples have given up on trying. They are too set in their ways, and just do not care. However, he also says, that even if just one person in a couple wants it to work, there is hope. He or she might initiate a change in the other person.

Peter Sacco’s Special Offers

Anger Management, Bad Habits, and Addiction

Grab Peter Sacco’s Critically Acclaimed Anger Management Book
Plus 2 Other Books For Just $1. CLICK HERE.

Anti-bullying

Download Peter Sacco’s FREE Anti-Bullying Books! CLICK HERE.

Related episodes:

Uncovering the Truth About Anger with Peter Sacco

5 Ways to Prevent Angry Outbursts


Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Peter Sacco’s Links

PeterSacco.com

BullyingisfortheBirds.com

Twitter

Facebook


Create an Epic Life

join The Dad Edge Alliance

CLICK HERE!

Dad Edge Alliance