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ruari fairbains

How to Conquer Alcohol Addiction with Ruari Fairbains

Ruari Fairbains, founder of One Year No Beer, comes on the GDP Podcast to challenge us to take a plunge into the uncommon world of 100% sobriety for one year.

 

Pumpkin spice beer, ale, hard cider, even Pumpkin Spiced Baileys Irish Cream are in full production and it’s the time of year when liquor manufacturers really make their holiday drinking push. Holiday parties, family gatherings and work functions seem synonymous with alcohol consumption during this season, in particular. Maybe you’ll even hear a couple stories about how things got out of hand at the office Christmas Party because Bob in accounting had one too many Jack and Cokes (sorry if your name is Bob and you’re in accounting).  But what if we made just “being” synonymous with these events? What if being sober was cool and drinking went by the wayside? Whoa, you say? Don’t take my beer, man, it’s how I get through this time of year!!

The increasingly popular podcast, One Year No Beer, challenges people to do just that: leave the booze behind for just 90 days. In this 90 days, forgo any type of alcoholic beverage and see what changes occur.

Better Health

The common thread in those who choose not to imbibe is better health. No alcohol equals no beer gut, better sleep habits, better sexual health and better health overall. Not to mention, you become more alert.

Better Employee

Those who have taken the challenge find they have a better focus at work. Better focus equals better job performance, leading to possibly better positions in the workplace. Think about having a more pleasant work experience simply because YOU feel better.

Ruari Fairbains on Better Family Time

Removing alcohol also opens you up to becoming more present with your family. Your mood will improve (let’s face it: alcohol alters our brain chemistry no matter how little or how much we consume). When you are better mentally, those around you will take notice and you will have more pleasant experiences with those you love.

Be the Example

Your kids are watching. You know this. When you handle tough social situations with alcohol, even if it is simply social drinking, your kids witness this. In their minds, alcohol equates to social situations because mom and dad use it during these times, even if it’s just a glass of wine to wind down. But if we change that paradigm and make other things synonymous with social situations, our kids will begin to see these differences as well. After all, they will learn how to behave from their parents.
So, even during this lovely fall season of Pumpkin Spiced Everything, maybe opt to remove the alcoholic version of this seasonal favorite. Instead, replace it with other events that get your endorphins going: take time out to laugh with those you love, get a bike ride in, take your clients to dinner and have a good time without the wine. You just might see that being with people without the filter of alcohol is just that much better.

RESOURCES

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Check out our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Check out a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Connect with Ruari Fairbains and One Year No Beer

Ruari Fairbains ONE YEAR NO BEER SITE

Ruari Fairbains ONE YEAR NO BEER PRIVATE FB GROUP

 

Thank you for checking out this week’s show with Ruari Fairbains, founder of One Year No Beer.

Shane Ramer

Overcoming Addition and Becoming a Dad with Purpose with Shane Ramer


Shane Ramer, founder and host of That Sober Guy Podcast, comes on the GDP and shares an extremely raw interview on addiction, substance abuse, recovery, and being a dad with purpose.  Brace yourself for this amazing interview with Shane Ramer.

It’s the elephant in the room. Everyone knows it’s there, but no one wants to say anything; better to keep the status quo than rock the boat. No one knows what will happen if the boat is rocked and that is scary. At the same time, we hate the elephant; it is destroying our family, our other relationships and possibly our job. The elephant is addiction and addiction is hard to admit. Shane Ramer, founder of thatsoberguy.com, knows this reality all too well.

 

Shane Ramer’s Childhood and Background

Growing up, Shane turned to alcohol to soothe the pain he endured dealing with a troubled childhood. As he became an adult, Shane realized that he was using alcohol to escape life’s realities and soon came face-to-face with the fact that his own marriage was struggling because of it. He hit a wall. He could not longer stand the elephant in the room. With that, he sat down with his wife and said he needed help. Shane knew he was meant for something much more than where he was.

 

Going through intensive counseling and support from his family and friends, Shane learned to manage his life as an alcoholic. Knowing that he wasn’t the only one struggling, Shane started thatsoberguy.com in order to help other men struggling with similar issues. Today, Shane is a successful businessman, husband and father, dedicated to helping men voice their fears that keep them in the bonds of addiction.

 

But I’m Not an Addict

 

We’re not saying you are, but the lessons Shane discusses reach to all men. Society is great at telling boys that real men don’t cry, “suck it up” and never show emotion. So what do you do with all that pent-up emotion? Maybe you already have a healthy way of showing emotion, or maybe you need a little liquid courage to loosen up or just maybe you can’t get to work in the morning without your daily beer. Wherever you are on the spectrum, the learning to deal with fears and emotions without bottling them up will make you and those around you much happier.

 

It’s Ok to Talk About It

 

Again, we men are great at helping others solve their problems. That’s what we think we are here for. Our own problems? What problems? Oh! You mean the ones we don’t talk about? Well, we’ll be fine. Will we? Take a look at your own life and think about areas where your bottled-up emotions eat away at your true self. What is the worst thing that is going to happen if you talk to someone about your issues? You actually may deal with them? Whoa. What about your Man Card? Guess what, it’s safe and secure and probably in better condition than it was when you kept your fears and feelings to yourself.

 

Be A Man

 

Being a man means owning up to all areas of our lives. Even our fears. Showing up as the best dad, husband, employee and friend takes guts. Owning our issues takes even more guts and grit. You’ve got it in you, so be the best man you can be right now.

Resources:

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Check out our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Check out a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Connect with Shane Ramer:

Shane Ramer Twitter

Shane Ramer Website

Shane Ramer That Sober Guy Podcast

Shane Ramer Private FB Page (invite/request entry only)

jack canfield

How to Accelerate Personal Achievement and Life Fulfillment with Jack Canfield

Jack Canfield, author of Chicken Soup for the Soul as well as a new book, 30 Day Sobriety Solution, gives a fresh perspective on this sometimes difficult balance,

“Every life has its benefits and costs and once you realize that, you get out of jealousy and resentment.”

-Jack Canfield TWEET THAT

Jack Canfield on Resiliency

So, maybe you didn’t have the best childhood, or maybe you grew up with every privilege under the sun. It really doesn’t matter. It’s really all about how you come out of the situation and how you respond to the situations you’ve been through. Through this, you provide your children with the ultimate example of resiliency and success.

“Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of life’s longing for itself. They come through you, but not from you. And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.”- Khalil Gibran.

Wow. Such an impactful statement, but one that might be hard to put into practice. We want so much for our children to have the best of everything that we sometimes lose sight of our role in their lives. Sometimes we forget that our children are their own person, not a smaller replica of ourselves. In not understanding this difference, we may try to put our children in activities or situations we wish we would have had for our own childhoods.

Jack Canfield on Intention

But, it’s also about having the intention and willingness to put in the time. Jack had regrets and guilt in parenting, but he was able overcome those feelings because he knew he had to be the best example as a father. He knew he had to love each of his children individually. There’s a lesson here: you’ve got to love each child the way they want to receive it, not the way you want to give it. Accept your child for the person they are, not for whom you want them to be. Sometimes we try to turn our children into the children we wished we could have been or have the opportunities that will make us look like good parents. You have children; you are not your children. You have to let them be themselves.

Correcting Behavior and Praise

When children make mistakes, instead of constantly correcting them for what they have done wrong, point out what they have done right. Leave it there. Then, when they attempt the same task again, praise what they did the time before and then give a suggestion regarding the part of the task they need to correct. If you have young children, be careful with how you approach moments where they fail and succeed. Between the ages of 3-8, Jack says, research indicates that their self esteem is at its most vulnerable. Granted, during their entire childhood children are building their self worth, but it is these years that seem the most critical.

Jack Canfield and The 30 Day Sobriety Solution

But being the best parent for our children stems, as we’ve seen so many times on the GDP, from how we respond to challenges in our daily lives. Jack approaches this in his new book, 30 Day Sobriety Solution. You may not be an alcoholic, but Jack says in his book that even when we are casual, social drinkers, we still may be using that glass of wine or a beer to “wind down” or “take the edge off.” You may even find that when you have that drink, you aren’t really present for those you love: you’d rather fall asleep instead of reading your child that bed time story after the simple glass of wine (or two). Maybe you question how you’ll enjoy a night out without that one drink, or how you’ll get through that social work setting without the beer. But as Jack points out and his book addresses, there may be some underlying factors we may be covering with that drink.

It’s about being your BEST SELF

It’s really about being your best self in all aspects of your life-putting down a drink may just be one of them. Jack’s advice? Be as committed to being a great dad as you are to your job, your hobby or other things you find important. If you want something different, you have to do something different. The choices you make and actions you take today determine your outcomes for tomorrow.

Free Resources:

Check out a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

The Dads Edge Book

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Jack Canfield Links:

Jack Canfield Website

The 30 Day Sobriety Solution

Jack Canfield Facebook Fan Page

Jack Canfield Twitter

The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman

Thank you for checking out this episode with Jack Canfield.  This episode is one to remember!