Podcast Episodes

reitre wealthy

How to Improve Your Financial Health and Retire Wealthy – GDP018

3 Easy Ways to Save and Retire Wealthy

Setting a goal to improve our financial health and retire wealthy can be daunting.  We ask ourselves questions like:

“How much should I set aside per month?”

“There are so many choices when it comes to investment funds, which should I choose?”

“How do I save enough money to retire wealthy?”

At times, all we need is some guidance and an advisor to help guide the way.

In this episode, we interviewed Brian McGraw and Jon Graf.  Both are financial advisors and our show sponsors.  The advice given by the both of them in this interview is a game changer.

Key Takeaways from Episode

1. Have a written plan to retire wealthy
2. Stick to the plan
3. Protect the plan
4. The differences between Roth IRA, 401K, and Targeted Retirement Date Funds
5. The percentage of income you should be saving every month for retirement
6. Ways to be disciplined and stick to a plan
7. Why it’s important to protect your plan and family

Tip #1:  Retiring wealthy starts with having a written plan and saving now

In 1996, there was a great book written by Thomas Stanley called “The Millionaire Next Door.”  It was proven that most millionaires did three critical things to ensure they retired wealthy.

First, they had a written plan.  A written plan will give you a roadmap, some direction, and a goal to strive for.  Plus, the visualization of actually “putting pen to paper” and writing down your goals for retirement make them more realistic and visual.

Second, self-made millionaires live within their means.  Meaning, a lot of self-made millionaires start their professional lives living within a budget.   In this episode, both Brian and Jon explain why living on a budget doesn’t have to a challenge.  In fact, most of the time, it is simply shifting minor spending habits.

Third, most self-made millionaires started saving at a young age.  The younger you are when you start saving, the less you have to save and the easier it is.  However, Jon and Brian explain why it is never too late to start saving.  Even if you are well into your forties and fifties, there are programs and plans you can implement that can make a drastic positive impact to your retirement goals.  The worst mistake is never saving anything.

Tip #2:  Retiring wealthy means sticking to the Plan:

There are several different investment options out there.  One of the best ways to plan for the future is to be prepared for peaks and valleys in income.  Challenging situations can show up in several different ways in our lives and it can be tempting to pull money out of your retirement to pay for something you think you need now.  Ensuring that you put enough money into an emergency fund can definitely help cushion an unexpected financial blow.

Another way to stick to a plan is make sure you are diversified with assets.  In this episode, Brian and Jon explain the clear differences between a traditional 401K, a Roth IRA, and target retirement date funds.  There are tax benefits of each plans, however, Jon does a great job of clearly explaining the differences and advantages of each.

Finally, when we think about sticking to a plan, it doesn’t just mean we don’t dip into our retirement too early.  It also means, realizing that the market will go up and down.  As a result, our retirement funds will also go up and down.  Jon does a great job explaining why it is human nature to want to change an entire strategy or pull our money out of the market all together when the market takes a downturn.  Jon explains the theory of “buy on fear and sell on happiness” when it comes to sticking to your plan.

Tip #3: Retiring wealthy means protecting your plan

Would you ever think of driving your kids in the car without their seatbelt?  If you are here and reading this blog, then I imagine the answer is “Absolutely not!”  As parents, we want to do everything in our power to protect and provide for our family.  To protect our family against harm is literally wired within our DNA.  So, when it comes to protecting our family, we need to make sure they are protected if anything should ever happen to us.

Brian explains saving money to retire wealthy is an outstanding “offense.”  However, we have to think about having a “defense” as well.  Being able to provide income to protect and provide for our families is one of our most valuable assets.  We insure our homes, cars, and even new electronic devices.  So, why wouldn’t we insure the most important asset we have…our income?

Free Resources:

Check out a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Links and Books Mentioned in this Episode

Connect with Brian McGraw and Jon Graf:

Brian McGraw:

Jon Graf:

Thank You!

Thank you so much for checking out this episode of The Good Dad Project. If you haven’t done so already, please take a minute to subscribe and leave a quick rating and review of the show on iTunes by clicking on the link below. It will help us to keep delivering life-changing information for you every week!

parenting style

How Your Childhood Can Affect Your Parenting Style And Learning “The Order Of Man” With Ryan Michler – GDP017

How Your Childhood Can Affect Your Parenting Style And Learning “The Order Of Man” With Ryan Michler – GDP017

Is it possible to be a good dad even if you grew up in a fatherless environment as a kid?

Definitely.

Is it possible to learn a positive parenting style for your own kids even if your own father was abusive or struggled with an addiction?

Absolutely.

Episode Overview:

In this episode, Larry and Shawn interview Ryan Michler, father of 3 and founder of “THE ORDER OF MAN.”  Ryan’s background is very unique.  He grew up virtually in a fatherless environment for most of his childhood.  During the time his father was present, he struggled with a drug and alcohol addiction.  Ryan shares with us how he struggled with he first became a father 7 years ago.  Ryan openly admits, “I felt like in the beginning I was kind of a jerk…but I knew I wanted to give my kids better than what I had growing up.”  Ryan never had a drug or alcohol problem, but struggled with not knowing exactly how to be a dad with his own unique parenting style.  Like so many of us who didn’t have a positive father figure growing up, we can struggle with knowing exactly what to do.  However, there are dads who take action and decide to make a conscious decision to be better.  Ryan shares some of his insights and what he has learned since he has launched the ORDER OF MAN website, community, and podcast.

TURN YOUR WEAKNESSES INTO A POSITIVE PARENTING STYLE

Ryan knew that he wanted to be a father who would provide emotional support, physical affection, and to be a strong foundational leader for his wife and three kids.  When his first son was born seven years ago, he knew it was time for a positive change in his life.  He decided to take action and implement strategies to ensure he would live a life of being the dad he wanted to be.

SURROUND YOURSELF WITH POSITIVE PEOPLE AND HEALTHY ROLE MODELS

Ryan shares whom we spend time with will make a huge difference in the dads we become.  “If we surround ourselves with people who are positive role models in our lives, we will strive to give that same value to others around us.  “Surrounding ourselves with other dads who have a similar mission to be the best version of themselves is critical to our own successful parenting style.  We become who we surround ourselves with.”

BE PRESENT IN THE MOMENT

Another great strategy that Ryan shares is making sure we are 100% with our kids while in their presence.  In our busy modern worlds, it is so easy to get caught up in the daily grind of life.  We can easily become so distracted by our devices, electronics, and work that we forget that our children truly just want our presence and attention.

WHY RYAN DEVELOPED “THE ORDER OF MAN”

Ryan has a great passion by not only improving himself, but he also has a desire to help others.  Not long ago, Ryan decided to start a website, a blog, and a podcast in the hopes of helping other men improve their lives and mission as well.  The Order of Man is founded upon 11 pillars that are the foundation of his mission. Those pillars are:  Career, Charity, Community, Faith, Family, Finances, Intellect, Leadership, Manly-Skills, Relationships, and Self-Mastery.  Coming soon, he will be launching an online course with the intent to help dads become their very best.

Free Resources:

Check out a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Blogs/Articles mentioned in this show:

http://www.orderofman.com/why-order-of-man/

Where to find Ryan:

  • www.facebook.com/orderofman
  • www.twitter.com/orderofman
  • www.instagram.com/orderofman
  • www.youtube.com/orderofman 

Thank You!

Thank you so much for checking out this episode of The Good Dad Project. If you haven’t done so already, please take a minute to subscribe and leave a quick rating and review of the show on iTunes by clicking on the link below. It will help us to keep delivering life-changing information for you every week!

Thomas Fiffer, divorced dad

Essential Parenting Tips for the Divorced Man with Thomas Fiffer – GDP016

Essential Parenting Tips for the Divorced Man

Larry and Shawn were extremely grateful to have Thomas Fiffer on the show.  Thomas is an author and the Executive Editor of The Good Men Project.  Thomas oversees over 200 published articles per week from several different writers.  The site is dedicated to be a shining example of the modern man.  The Good Men Project is one of the most popular sites for men and women generating over 3 million unique visitors per month.  It offers several resources, blogs, articles, and links to books that help men and women simply understand each other better.

Key Take-Aways

In this episode, Thomas gives us several key strategies to help any divorced man:

  • Overcome common challenges of divorced Dads

  • How to model healthy relationship behavior to our kids

  • How to Dismantle the stereotypical incompetent father stereotype

Advantages to being a Divorced Man

The divorce rate is nearly 47% in the US.  Unfortunately, being a divorced man in the 20th century comes with several challenges.  However, Thomas shares a few insights that can be advantageous.

1.  There can be “relief and peace” within divorce. Meaning, once a relationship is beyond repair, divorce can offer an opportunity for each individual to heal from a troubled relationship.
2.  Divorce can also allow us to show up better as a parent without the constant stress and presence of a troubled relationship.
3.  Limited time with with kids allows the divorced man to give 100% of his attention to his children while he is in their presence.

Model Healthy Relationship Behavior

Modeling healthy relationship behavior to our kids can certainly be a challenge when divorced dads have limited time with kids.  Tom shares his insights about what it means to model healthy relationship behavior being a divorced man.

  • Respect:  Respect is the foundation of any relationship.  Ensuring we are teaching our kids through example about respect.  Finally, ensuring that we are demonstrating what “self-respect” is to our kids through example.

  • Control the Controllables:  The only people we can truly control are ourselves.  Don’t waste time or energy trying to control someone else in a relationship.

  • Be The Best for the Ex:  As difficult as that may sound, it will eventually make everyone’s life easier.  That doesn’t mean that a divorced man has to be the best for his ex.  It also means the divorced woman has to do the same.  This is a mutual agreement between both people to simply be their best for each other to achieve the same goal of raising healthy kids.

How to recognize a rotten relationship before it’s too late

Thomas wrote an article several years ago that gained a lot of attention on the internet.  The article really hit home with a lot of people.  It was entitled The 7 Deadly Signs of a Dysfunctional Relationship

Below are the 7 Deadly Signs:

1. Tedium: You have the same argument over and over again and never resolve it. This is perhaps the most obvious sign that something is wrong.

2. Blame: Everything is always your fault. And I mean everything. Dysfunctional partners avoid accountability like the plague.

3. Guilt: You’re constantly apologizing, even for things you didn’t do. Keeping the peace requires you to suck it up—every single time. It becomes a joke, the way you take the fall for everything, but it’s not funny, and you begin to feel worthless and ashamed.

4. Tension: When things are good, you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop.

5. Uncertainty: You never know who’s going to be there when you get home. One night, your partner is sweet, kind, and forgiving. The next, you can do no right.

6. Frustration: Getting even the simplest things done is hugely complicated. Despite your best efforts, you’re always butting heads and can’t work with your partner as a team. If you try to lead, you’re attacked. If you try to follow, you’re never doing enough of the scutwork.

7. Hopelessness: You feel like there’s a dark cloud over your life that won’t go away—a permanent weather system that obscures the sun. This is the saddest feeling of all. You lose your optimism, your light, the spark that keeps you going.

Read Thomas Fiffer’s Full Article Here:  The 7 Deadly Signs of a Dysfunctional Relationship

Free Resources:

Check out a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Links Mentioned In This Episode

Books Mentioned In This Episode

perfect-supplements-banner3.png Thank You! Thank you so much for checking out this episode of The Good Dad Project. If you haven’t done so already, please take a minute to subscribe and leave a quick rating and review of the show on iTunes by clicking on the link below. It will help us to keep delivering life-changing information for you every week!

terrible husband

Confessions of a Terrible Husband with Nick Pavlidis – GDP015

Confessions of a Terrible Husband

Nick Pavlidis writes, speaks, and coaches on improving relationships and starting/growing businesses in a way that respects family boundaries. His first book, Confessions of a Terrible Husband: Lessons Learned from a Lumpy Couch takes you inside the mind (and house) of a terrible husband who thought he knew it all and the process he undertook to improve his relationship from the inside out. Nick shows us how he became a terrible husband and gives us the exact process he undertook to become a more loving and engaged husband and father.

Key Take-Aways

  • Nick gives some pretty direct advice on how to improve work/life balance.

  • How we can confuse “work success” with “life and relationship success”

  • How to keep your priorities straight in marriage and business

Why Nick Was a Terrible Husband:

Nick was actually not a “stereotypical terrible husband.”  Nick was a loving, gentle, non-abusive husband.  However, before his transformation, he claims his life revolved around work.  During our interview with Nick, he reveals what it was like living in the mind, the house, and the relationship of “a self-proclaimed terrible husband.”

His Life Revolved Around Work

Before Nick’s transformation, he struggled with a serious imbalance of work and family time.  He tells us in the interview that his family obligations revolved around the demands of his day job as an attorney.

“Work/Family Balance” is something that nearly every Dad struggles with.  Reason being, we derive a lot of value and validation from the workplace.  At times it is so easy to confuse providing for our families in a materialistic manner vs. an emotional manner.

If you are struggling with this, trust me, you are not alone.  So many of us struggle with this daily battle.  Nick shares a lot of heartfelt tips and tricks to help all of us get over this obstacle.

How Nick Completely Changed

You may be thinking that Nick suddenly realized the error of his ways and made dramatic shifts in his perspective and behavior.  However, he tells us he did the exact opposite.

Nick states:  “I just tried to do the next right thing.”

Nick decided not to make a huge production about his decision to be better.  Instead, he decided to simply make daily shifts in his behavior all based around the mindset of “doing the next right thing.”  He based a lot of his new behavior, perspective, and actions on the below principles:

  • He used the leadership strategies he learned in the business world and applied them to his marriage.

  • He realized success in business didn’t mean success in life.

  • He focused on changing himself and not changing the people in his life.

  • He learned his triggers when he was more likely to be unpleasant.

  • He decided to help and learn life-changing guidance from mentors.

Free Resources:

Check out a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Nick Pavlidis Links

  • Twitter: @nickpavlidis

  • Facebook www.facebook.com/aterriblehusband

  • Site: www.ATerribleHusband.com

  • Book: www.ATerribleHusband.com/Amazon

  • Podcast: www.ATerribleHusband.com/iTunes, www.ATerribleHusband.com/Stitcher, or www.ATerribleHusband.com/PodcastPlayer

Books Mentioned In This Episode

perfect-supplements-banner3.png Thank You!

Thank you so much for checking out this episode of The Good Dad Project. If you haven’t done so already, please take a minute to subscribe and leave a quick rating and review of the show on iTunes by clicking on the link below. It will help us to keep delivering life-changing information for you every week!

sports performance anxiety

4 Fundamental Strategies to Alleviate Sports Performance Anxiety – GDP014

“4 Fundamental Strategies to Alleviate Sports Performance Anxiety in Our Kids” Episode Overview:

Larry Hagner and Shawn Stevenson talk about 4 fundamental strategies to help our kids get the most out of sporting events. At times, it can be challenging as parents to know exactly how to help bring the best out in our child when they are competing. Shawn and Larry not only offer four strategies to help Dads, but also share some of their own stories and experiences.

Key Take-Aways

  • Focus on progress and not necessarily the results

  • Be extremely mindful of your words when giving feedback about sports performance

  • When it comes to sports performance expectations, don’t set the bar too high

  • Ways to talk to our kids after a sporting event

Progress vs. Results

At times, we can be so focused on the ultimate result of winning vs. the level of improvement. When it comes to sports performance anxiety, we can help alleviate stress by giving our kids techniques to improve it.

For example, instead of telling our kids to “hit the baseball”, we can help them work on their stance or the speed of their swing. Giving kids these small steps for improvement will vastly improve their enjoyment of competing in sports. After all, it’s not whether our kids win or lose. The main objective is to ensure our kids enjoy themselves and learn to improve.

Be Mindful of Your Word Choice When Giving Feedback

Kids hang on every word we say when it comes to critical feedback. Some of the word choices we use sound extremely positive and supportive from our point of view. However, they can have the opposite effect on our kids. As a result, our word choice and feedback can actually increase sports performance anxiety.

For example, the statement “Let’s make sure we go 3 for 3 today!” can sound uplifting to us. However, for some kids, this can create a great deal of pressure and anxiety. Keep in mind, pressure and anxiety at a young age can be the opposite of fun.

Setting the Bar Too High

Youth athletics is meant to be fun and competitive. For the most part, there is a very small percentage of kids who will go on to the professional level. It’s so easy to fall into the trap of expecting our kids to perform at the top level each and every time. Just like us, they will have bad days. Even the best youth athletes (and professionals, for that matter) have bad performances from time to time. The main focus of each and every event is simply to ensure your little athlete tried their very best and enjoyed themselves.

Conversation in the Car Ride Home Will Be Forever Remembered

For the past two years, I have had the privilege of hosting “Dad Workshops” to help other dads be their best. I have had several conversations with other dads who talk about memories of “the dreaded ride home after a game.” In other words, if the performance was not ideal, the conversation was not a good one. Moreover, the conversation would forever become a memory that was less than optimal.

The car ride home is a perfect opportunity to mention all the positive things you noticed about the game regardless if the performance was good or bad. Asking questions like:

  • What was your favorite part of the game?

  • What position did you enjoy playing the most?

  • What part was the most fun?

Questions like these bring our kids into a positive conversation about the highlights of the game. Ultimately, it will help alleviate sports performance anxiety and bring the fun back into sports performance.

Free Resources:

Check out a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Books Mentioned In This Episode

perfect-supplements-banner3.png Thank You!

Thank you so much for checking out this episode of The Good Dad Project. If you haven’t done so already, please take a minute to subscribe and leave a quick rating and review of the show on iTunes by clicking on the link below. It will help us to keep delivering life-changing information for you every week!