If you are here, it most likely means you are a MARRIED DAD. There is a perception out there in today’s society that if you are a MARRIED DAD with a traditional family, there must not be any challenges or obstacles. That is simply not the case. If you are a married Dad, it means you most likely view yourself as the strength and rock of your family. It means you most likely quietly stress about the things that your wife and kids do not know about. It means you most likely work extremely hard at work because you know that life is not all about you…it’s about those amazing people around you. It also means at times you have to figure out how to juggle work time, kid time, quality time with your spouse, and perhaps a little bit of time for yourself somehow. Being in this situation, means you are pulled in several different directions. This page is dedicated especially for you. You will find valuable tips and tricks that will make your journey more enjoyable.

sexy marriage

Simple, Sexy Marriage with Dr. Corey Allan

Today we have Dr. Corey Allan on the show. He is a marriage and family therapist and the host of the Sexy Marriage Radio podcast, which has been going strong for seven years. Dr. Allan outlines most common problems couples bring to his office, including sex. In this conversation, we get granular about sex issues along with intimacy and pornography.

In his experience, Dr. Corey Allan estimates that that man has the higher desire for sex in 70% of marriages, but men tend to follow a script and don’t get creative with their wives. He tells us what we’re doing wrong when it comes to trying to get more sexual with our spouses and how to talk about it without putting them on the defense. He also talks about the 30% of marriages in which the woman has the higher desire for sex and how couples can manage that.

You may be surprised by his advice. Download this episode because you’ll want to listen to it again!

'A woman knows very well if the goal for the day is in her pants.'—Dr. Corey Allan @simplemarriage #marriage #sex #intimacy Click To Tweet

'We’re quick to blame our spouse for our troubles.'—Dr. Corey Allan @simplemarriage #marriage #sex #intimacy Click To Tweet

What You’ll Learn

  • How to improve the marriage you have
  • How to stop the blame cycle
  • Why you need to stop trying to fix your wife and instead fix yourself
  • How to invite good changes into your life
  • The main complaints from women
  • How the fear of rejection is magnified to a woman
  • How to be a student of your wife
  • Non-sexual touch
  • The 4 Most Common Marriage Problems:
    • Sex
    • Money
    • In-laws
    • Children
  • How to succeed by respecting your wife’s differences rather than trying win her over to your way of thinking
  • The danger of being attached to outcomes
  • The difference between functional sex and sex for intimacy
  • Two components of intimacy:
    • Knowing your partner
    • Being known yourself
  • How intimacy can be just as likely comfortable as uncomfortable
  • Why there’s nothing wrong with a wife who doesn’t want to have sex
  • How the higher desire spouse has to recognize the lower desire spouse
  • How women were wired to be responsive, not initiative
  • How men often try to manufacture a way to penetrate instead of encouraging a response
  • Why you have to live a life beyond your wife, a life that’s inspiring to her
  • If you’re with her, be present with her. Quality time is more effective than the quantity of time
  • Why you shouldn’t hover around your wife waiting for sex
  • How foreplay is a long play in marriage
  • Why a fully turned on woman can be terrifying for men
  • The debilitating effects of porn
  • How women want to be led their husbands
  • How the way you conduct yourself in life translates in the bedroom
'Everything we do in marriage communicates. Everything we do NOT do in marriage communicates.'—Dr. Corey Allan @simplemarriage Click To Tweet

RELATED EPISODES

How to Optimize the 5 Dimensions of Manhood

Black Belt Husband with Quentin Hafner


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Corey Allan’s Links

sexymarriage.net

Twitter

 

 

Resources

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Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

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becoming a great husband

Black Belt Husband with Quentin Hafner

Have you ever felt overwhelmed by the expectations placed on you as a husband? Are you confused about what exactly your wife needs from you? Is your marriage in a rut but you don’t know the first step to getting out?

Today’s guest is Quentin Hafner, author of Black Belt Husband: A Marriage Book for Men. He’s a couples counselor by day and a Brazilian jujitsu practitioner by night. Quentin has developed a methodology to becoming a great husband inspired by the martial arts belt system.

There is no need to feel hopeless when your marriage hits a wall, even if the sex has all but disappeared and you and your spouse at moments hate each other. Quentin Hafner breaks it all down for us in this episode!

'What’s different about a relationship today is that women have an expectation that men can fulfill them emotionally...'—Quentin Hafner, Black Belt Husband #marriage #men #manhood #relationships Click To Tweet

What You’ll Learn

  • Why did Quentin Hafner decided to write Black Belt Husband
  • Why most guys aren’t interested in mainstream relationship books
  • How your actions are a choice, your feelings are not a choice
  • How marital bliss will naturally subside in between 6 and 24 months
  • How to stop judging your own feelings
  • How having uncomfortable feelings about your marriage is common
  • How everybody has the feeling of hating their spouse at some time
  • How negative feelings doesn’t mean your marriage is broken, only that a problem needs to be addressed
  • Quentin’s mission to normalize these feelings so men don’t panic
  • How not to react to your feelings, but instead correct your course
  • The two main things that silently destroy a marriage
    • Apathy – being too casual, leaving the relationship on cruise control. Marriages are like a living organism that needs nurturing and tending to.
    • Understanding the importance of offering your wife an emotional connection – Marriages from 2018 are hugely different from 1975. Women have an expectation of emotional fulfilment. Being a provider is not enough and most guys struggle with how to do that.
  • How to understand your own needs as a man
  • How to communicate those needs to your wife
  • Why listening to your wife is only half the equation
  • To offer the full emotional connection requires you to share
  • Women are desperate for men to share, to find out about the person they are with
  • A man’s options in an argument
  • Why shutting down emotionally is like drinking your own poison
  • How taking risks and being honest about your feelings is like magic to your marriage
  • How being “the rock” for your spouse is the biggest myth
  • The similarities between the journey through marriage and jujitsu
  • Quentin’s belt system for becoming a great husband
    • White belt – being coachable and open minded
    • Blue belt – building self-confidence and internal strength
    • Purple belt – becoming well-rounded
    • Brown belt – being a great leader in marriage
    • Black belt – mastery
  • How sex for women is a completely emotional experience and they need to feel extremely secure and attached to have a healthy libido
  • Advice to men in a sexless marriage
  • Why you shouldn’t hesitate to get professional help
'Your job as a husband is not to become a mini-therapist to your wife.'—Quentin Hafner, Black Belt Husband #marriage #husbands #men #fathers #manhood #communication Click To Tweet

RELATED EPISODES

The Easy and Effective Way to Budget for Your Goals with Jesse Mecham


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Quentin Hafner’s Links

blackbelthusband.com

Black Belt Husband Brotherhood Facebook Group

Facebook

Instagram

Black Belt Husband: A Marriage Book for Men on Amazon

 

Resources

Fill out an application for The Dad Edge Alliance

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We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


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dave hollis

How to Optimize The Structure of Work, Family, and Fulfillment with Dave Hollis

Can work-life balance ever be achieved?

Our guest today is Dave Hollis, and he says work-life balance is unattainable. There is no such thing because our lives constantly fluctuate. Sometimes, our kids need us. At other times, our marriage requires more attention. Maybe our health has been neglected and we need to focus on taking care of our bodies. There will also be points in our lives where work demands all of our energy. Life is unpredictable and we must be prepared to adapt.

We are stoked to have Dave Hollis on The Dad Edge. Dave worked for Disney for 17 years selling movies like Star Wars and The Avengers to theaters, and he recently left his position to help his wife Rachel develop her business. Dave tells us why he quit what most people would consider a dream job and how he and his wife grow their media company while raising four kids. He also talks about their technique called ‘frontloading’ to optimize the structure of work, family, and fulfillment for an incredible life.

'Your kids only have one experience that they know is normal—the one you create for them. They are watching us pursue our dreams ... we are modeling for them.'—Dave Hollis #parenting #dads #men #fathers #fatherhood #dadlife Click To Tweet

 

Dave Hollis

Dave is the father of four and married to NY Times Bestselling Author, Rachel Hollis. She began with an event planning business that morphed in to a lifestyle blog, which eventually became Chic Media. Dave was in the sales side of the movie business. He made lots of money, but he didn’t feel like he was challenged. He made the bold choice to leave his job to help Rachel scale up her business. They moved from the outskirts of LA to a small town in Texas where they publish content, podcasts, and books. They also organize events and have launched a line of apparel and other products. Dave says they still like each other after six months of working together, but they have their communication and planning down to a science. They call it ‘frontloading’ and it is how they structure their lives for greatness.

'You can find every excuse why you’re not currently having the intimate relationship you want with your spouse.'—Dave Hollis #relationships #marriage #intimacy #communication Click To Tweet

What You’ll Learn

  • Why you have to acknowledge that you’re not going to “do it all”
  • How Dave got comfortable with the fact that work-life balance is not a possibility
  • How Dave and Rachel use a community of family, nannies, and babysitters to help with their four kids
  • How they deal with judgement about their parenting techniques
  • What ‘frontloading’ is and how and when they do it
  • How to delegate responsibilities to avoid resentment
  • Dave’s recovery from codependency
  • How to stop feeling guilty for other people’s judgements
  • Using apps to coordinate family activities
  • Why health is the foundation of his family’s life
  • Dave and Rachel’s non-negotiable weekly date night
  • Why Dave and Rachel take two vacations–one with the kids and one without them
  • How Dave and Rachel make out regularly
  • The Hollis’ experience with foster children (one of whom they adopted)
  • Why you must fuel your kids’ passions (not what you think they should be interested in)
  • The importance of letting go and allowing your kids to have their own experiences without you
  • How to reach for uncertainty to find growth and fulfillment

 

'You will not be the single force that shapes the way your child develops into an adult.'—Dave Hollis #parenting #helicopterparenting #dads #fathers #fatherhood Click To Tweet

 

RELATED EPISODES

How to Optimize the 5 Dimensions of Manhood

Defying All Odds with Anthony Trucks

Coaching Kids for Greatness with former NFL player Anthony Trucks


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Dave Hollis’s Links

TheHollisCo.com

Instagram:

@mrdavehollis
@msdavehollis

Facebook

Podcasts:

Rise

Rise Together

Resources

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Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

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Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


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guide to women

Ultimate Guide to Demystifying Women with Robert Kandell


Men are supposed to be strong and silent, right? We think if we work hard and provide we will be rewarded. This is what our culture has taught us, and this is what we think women want. But this idea is becoming obsolete in today’s society.

The world has changed drastically when it comes to the roles of men and women. The patriarchy humans lived in for thousands of years has shifted. Women have evolved but men have stayed the same. It’s time for us to catch up.

Today’s guest, Robert Kandell, is the host of the Tuff Love podcast and the author of the upcoming book unHIDDEN: A Book for Men & Those Confused by Them. He gives us the ultimate guide to demystifying women and tells us how to connect to ourselves so that our women can have what they want most, which is all of us.

'Women want the evolved man. The complicated man. The dynamic man ... They want to see all of you.'—@RobertKandell #men #marriage #women #relationships #vulnerability #masculinity Click To Tweet

Robert Kandell

Robert Kandell is a veteran of many worlds. He has spent time in corporate America, a start-up, a small computer shop, and then built an international 8-figure business based on relationship, intimacy and sexuality. He currently runs a successful consulting firm helping small businesses to become marketable and profitable. In addition to his business and management skills, Robert is an accomplished teacher, coach, and lecturer, helping men find themselves and utilize their internal power.

What You’ll Learn

  • Why men are so quiet about what’s going on in their minds
  • How most men know something is wrong with themselves and their relationships, but they can’t tell what it is
  • How hiding your fears and weaknesses from your woman hurts your relationship
  • How women want both Spartan strength and little-boy vulnerability at the right times
  • Why women want all aspects of their men
  • Why men need to connect to all aspects of themselves to give their woman everything she needs
  • What judgements block you from making those connections
  • How to get into the flow of self-discovery instead of fighting it
  • Confronting issues with your partner
  • Investigating different ways around communication
  • Practicing ways to implement new information
  • Integrating all you’ve learned into your life
  • Why withholding your struggles from your wife is an unconscious form of chauvinism
  • Difference between connecting with your wife and being a whiny baby
  • Why shaking things up is a huge turn on
  • The shame that runs our lives and blocks us from growing
  • Confronting sexual shame and guilt
  • How Robert Kandell opened up to his wife about his porn issue
  • The butterfly effect of free porn and how it leads to erectile dysfunction and prevents us from connecting with our wives
  • How porn activates the hunter and trains our brain to be addicted to novelty
  • The magical powers of communication
  • How to create communication containers
  • How to be a listener as well as a communicator
  • Robert Kandell’s most important advice as a dad raising two preteen step daughters

Like the show? Leave an iTunes review.

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Robert Kandell’s Links

Website

Prerelease Indiegogo

Facebook

Twitter

Instagram

Resources

Fill out an application for The Dad Edge Alliance

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Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


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keep dating your spouse

The Infinite Game of Marriage with Cara Miller


If we think of marriage as a game, we immediately strategize on how to win our spouses’ hearts the way we did the very first time. The problem is that our partners grow and change throughout life. To keep dating your spouse like you did in the past is not going to work anymore. As you will hear on our show today, the game of marriage is infinite. The goal is not to win, but to keep playing.

Today we have our fourth female guest on The Dad Edge. Her name is Cara Miller and she a developmental coach with a unique academic background, including wealth of insightful knowledge about how people connect and feel that sense of belonging that is so important for a rich, fulfilling life.

In this episode, Cara Miller tells how to initiate change in our relationships by dating our spouses for who they are today instead of who they were when we first met them.  She reveals simple, actionable steps we can take to become experts on the people we love, including kids, friends, and coworkers.

'Dating in marriage is an infinite game.'—Cara Miller #marriage #relationships #dating #wife #husband #love Click To Tweet

About Cara Miller MDIV PHD

Cara T. Miller ​is a professor, executive developmental coach, organizational design and change consultant in the fields of leadership, organizational development, adult development, and spiritual formation. Cara received a Master of Divinity from Princeton Theological Seminary and a PhD in Leadership Studies at the University of San Diego.

Cara draws on developmental psychology to coach people in many contexts (executives, partnerships, teams), adaptive leadership theory to consult to diverse organizations engaging in change efforts (military, higher education, finance, ministry), and is committed to first, second, and third person, here-and-now practices that support the sustainability of this integrative work.

'Our families are a school of love.'—Cara Miller #family #dads #men #fathers #parenting #communication Click To Tweet

What You’ll Learn

  • Why we pursue learning, yet resist change
  • How we can build neural pathways to change our habits and thinking
  • Why in focusing on ‘being’ first, the doing will follow
  • Why it won’t work if you try to keep dating your spouse the way you did the first time
  • Why the goal of the game of marriage is not to win, but to continue playing
  • How to learn who your spouse is now
  • How to get out of the loop of expectation
  • How to make yourself date-able again to your spouse
  • How to fill the tank of your relationships ahead of time to prepare for stressful situations
  • How to fulfill her needs based on what you want from her
  • How you can practice these communication techniques on your wife before moving on to your kids
  • How to be an interesting father to each of your kids
  • How to warm up for a heavy conversation with a pre-conversation
  • How your relationship is not something you have, it’s something you’re in
  • Why guessing what your partner wants is not going to work
  • How to create a way to be together as a couple that is different than it was and fits who you are right now
'We are not the experts on the people that we love.'—Cara Miller #love #marriage #connection #communication Click To Tweet

 

YNAB. You Need a Budget

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Cara Miller’s Links

inquiryp.com

Instagram: @Developmentalcoach

Free Coaching Newsletter

Resources

Fill out an application for The Dad Edge Alliance

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

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We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


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Become a member of The Dad Edge Alliance

APPLY HERE!

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What did you think of the show?

What was your biggest take away?

Tag us when you share on social media!

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