Dads who Adopt are Amazing too!

There are so many types of Dads out there.  Since I started this Project just a little over a year ago, I have had the opportunity to meet so many Dads.

I can tell you this…behind every face, there is a story.

The surprising thing I am learning through this Project is that most Dads keep pretty quiet about their own story, struggles, and accomplishments.

The goal of the GDP, is to be a voice for Dads.  It’s so important to simply recognize the everyday Dad who shows up with Purpose.

This week, I wanted recognize a true story of inspiration.

Doug Visconti just recently became a new Dad.

He and his wife Noelle adopted Anthony just a few short months ago.  Doug and Noelle have been going through the adoption process for years.  In fact, they have come close three previous times.

Unfortunately, the past attempts to adopt have resulted in the birth parents making a last minute decision to keep their child.  I cannot even begin to imagine the emotional roller coaster both Noelle and Doug have been on the past several years and attempts to adopt.

However, they kept moving forward despite their challenges.

Just a few months ago, they got a call from their agency letting them know this little boy, who was two months premature, was left in a hospital in Florida.

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Without thinking twice, they jumped on a plane and spent a month in Florida until little Anthony was healthy enough to go home.  I’m happy to say that Anthony is so healthy and is a part of a family who loves him more than life itself.

Anthony

Check out what Noelle wrote about Doug:

My name is Noelle and my husband, Doug and I just adopted a baby, Anthony.

I wanted to take this opportunity to explain why he is a Dad with purpose.  Not only did Doug sacrifice his expectation of having children of his own blood to fulfill his wife’s dream of helping a child already in this world, he also has made a decision to step up and become the father figure in a boy’s life.  Anthony was left alone in a hospital, waiting to see who would love him. He now has more affection and care than he may even want from Doug.  Doug talks constantly about what he wants to introduce to Anthony and how he wants to make sure his boy knows he will always have two people on his side, encouraging him and loving him along the way…no matter what. Adoption is just another means of creating dads with a purpose….  GOOD DADS at that!

Anthony and Doug

When we think about the everyday Dad, we usually think of the “Traditional Dad.”  We don’t always think about the perseverance and emotional capacity of our Dads who are desperately trying to adopt.  They definitely deserve some recognition.

Doug, thanks for inspiring us!  Noelle, thanks for sharing your story!

If you enjoyed Doug’s story, please give it a share on your social media.

Also, become a free member of our community.  Doesn’t matter if you are a Mom or a Dad…you being a part of our community is so important.

All the best,

Larry

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Amazing Dads Are there through all the “Ups and Downs”

As most of you know, we have started something a bit different at the Good Dad Project.  We have decided to do a story every week on one Inspiring Dad who is a part of our community.

Why are we doing this?

Because Dads are so important.  Yet, there is really nothing out there that recognizes the “Every Day Dad” and his contributions.

Well, we are here to change all of that.

I received this inspiring story about Ray Knourek this past week from his wife April.  Check out her story about Ray below.  It has so many golden nuggets.

April writes:

“So this is MY husband, Ray & my son Wyatt. I don’t even know where to begin, my husband is an amazing husband, father & provider for our family. When my son was born we decided it would be best if I stayed home to care for him … The impact that had on our family was huge, the financial strain worried me greatly but Ray assured me we would be okay. He works, literally, like a dog .. 70-75 hours a week so my son can have his Mother and so that we can enjoy the same lifestyle we’ve always known. He works tirelessly, when he is sick, tired .. you name it. There are times when Wyatt may only see Ray for an hour a day but Ray always makes sure that hour is the best part of both of their days whether it be story time, bath time … wrestling on the floor or just sitting camped out in front of the tv watching Blues Clues.”

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A Great Takeaway from Ray’s Story:

Ray is obviously a very hard worker.  Despite the long hours, he is 100% engaged when he is in the presence of his son.  Even if it is only for one hour, he makes the most of it.

When I see stories like this, it challenges me as a father to ask myself if I am doing the same?  Am I always 100% engaged when I am around my kids?

The honest answer is “No.”

At times, I am distracted.  I am watching TV, checking email, or seeing the latest post on Facebook.  Ray sends an important reminder to us that quality time is a precious thing.  Time with our kids is one thing we can never get back.

April, thanks for sharing Ray’s story!  He is obviously a Dad with Purpose on Purpose.

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If you are a mom and have a story to share about why your husband is an amazing Dad, please send me an email with a great photo.  Send to:  thegooddadproject@gmail.com

Please share Ray’s story on your social media if you thought this story was inspiring.

All the Best,

Larry

Founder of the Good Dad Project

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Making the Ordinary Moments Extraordinary

“Life moves pretty fast…if you don’t stop and take a look around every once in a while…you could miss it.”  -Farris Bueller

Personal story…for most of my childhood and adolescent life, I had very little sense of urgency.   I wasn’t a kid who played a lot outside or was very good at sports.  I was really good at playing video games, watching a lot of movies, and not spending time enjoying and living life.  Growing up I was overweight, I was a couch potato, and I watched life pass me by.

It wasn’t until I was in my later years in high school and college that I realized life is a gift.  Life is meant for us to enjoy.  I spent many years in my young life wasting my youth doing nothing.  It took almost half my life to learn life is not meant to be spent being miserable and not living life on purpose.

Here’s the honest truth…we ALL spend time in that similar situation in life.  We all have a period of time in our lives when we are watching life pass us by.  We know full well that we are not enjoying and living life to the fullest.  Maybe that is your situation now.

“Life isn’t about the number of breaths we take, but the moments that take our breath away.”  -Will Smith – Hitch

I have always heard that when you have kids life hits the fast forward button.  Before kids, I didn’t get that.  However, now that I have kids I can tell you it is absolutely true.

I can’t explain it.

Time moves so much faster when we have kids.  I have no doubt if you have kids; you are probably nodding your head “yes” as you read this.

We remember the day they are born.  What seems like an instant, we go from potty training to high school graduation?  Every parent can attest that time moves way too fast.

We start asking questions like:

“What happened to the time?” 

“If I had it to do over again, what would I do differently?” 

“Did I savor every memory and take advantage of every moment or did it pass me by?”

The main takeaway from today’s blog is to not wait for the right moment to create lasting memories…it’s to create the moments to make those lasting memories.

Your kids don’t care how much money you make.

They don’t care what kind of car you drive.

They don’t measure love in gifts and materialistic items.

They measure love by the amount of time you spend with them.

Time is the true lasting measure of love for our kids.  If you are going to invest in something…invest in making memories.

Invest in the quality time.  I promise, it will pay dividends.

We have some amazing dads who are involved with The Good Dad Project Community.  I wanted to point out two rock star Dads in particular….Kyle Kettner and John Gorman.

Kyle Kettner:

I have known Kyle for seven years.  I knew Kyle before the birth of his daughter Jersey Rose.  Even before the birth of his daughter, he was a man of purpose.  There aren’t many guys out there that would dress up as a king for an afternoon tea party.  Kyle took a tea party to a whole new level.

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Here is the main takeaway…

When Jersey is 18 years old, she won’t remember what she got for a present on her fifth birthday.  She won’t remember what Santa brought her for Christmas when she was five.  However, she will forever remember this moment with her dad.

She will be 50 years old and she will have these amazing memories and photos.  She may not remember Dad fixing the sink or her car…but she will remember Dad fixing her hair.  Tell me that isn’t priceless?

Kyle 1

 

John Gorman:

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I have known John for 3 years.  John didn’t have the best example growing up of what a father should be.  In fact, he had quite the opposite.  Many of us (me included) came from a childhood where we had a strong negative example.  However, like many amazing Dads, we either learn what to do or what not to do by example.  John has been such a positive example in his boy’s lives.  If you know John, you know he instills manners and respect.  He doesn’t hesitate to dress up as a superhero when going to see a movie with the family.  He doesn’t miss a chance to take his boys fishing.  He disconnects from work completely on weekends to focus on their lives and their activities.

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To wrap up…the main take away from this is to make your time with your kids memorable.  It doesn’t take a lot of money.   It is truly all about taking a “normal situation” and making it memorable.

Isn’t that true with anything in life?

If you have photos like this…please send them our way.  We would like to feature you in our next blog article.  Send them to:  thegooddadproject@gmail.com

If you have enjoyed our blog and mission, please give us a share on FB, Twitter, or Google Plus.

Thanks for all your support,

Larry

A Dad Legacy – 4 Lessons of Life

A Dad Legacy means more than just materialistic leave behinds

When you think of “A Dad Legacy” what comes to mind?

Most of us think of inheritance, money, or something of value left behind in a will.

However…

If you ask most of us Dads, we will tell you that we really don’t have a deep-seeded desire to leave behind trust funds, college funds, or property.  Don’t get me wrong, we absolutely want the best for our kids and we want to provide everything we possibly can from a financial stand point.  However, those materialistic items of value are not how we want to be remembered.

In October of 2013, I invited 10 Dads who were diehard followers of  The Good Dad Project Facebook Page to a focus group dinner.  

All 10 Dads had a two things in common:  

First, they didn’t know each other.

Second, being a Good Dad is something that is deeply rooted in every single one of them.

When I first arranged the evening, I didn’t know what to expect.  Some of these men I knew for one month and others I knew for over twenty years.

The night was pretty awesome to say the least.  I had ten questions to ask the group.

I really wanted to understand:  

1.  What Dads wanted most out of life and Fatherhood?

2.  What they battled with most and what challenges they faced through their own lives?

After two and a half hours, we had only gotten through four out of those ten questions.  There was so much discussion that we literally ran out of time.  It was almost like every single one of them had been holding in their own story and points of view on Fatherhood for too long.  Every single one of them shared successes, struggles, and goals.

There was one question that I asked in particular:

“What do you want your legacy to be and how do you want to be remembered?”

The answers really blew me away.  There was not one mention of money, inheritance, or trust funds.  No one said anything about leaving behind anything of materialistic value.  Every single one of them desired the basics.

1.  They wanted to pass on life lessons such as:  confidence, character, and integrity.

2.  They wanted to pass on lasting positive memories of spending time together.  Whether it be playing dress up (for those who had daughters) to taking their sons fishing and camping.

3.  They wanted to pass on family values and traditions.

4.  They just wanted their kids to remember how much their Dad really loved them.

Growing up, I didn’t have a stable father figure in my life.

I don’t share that out of a plea for pity.

In fact, I don’t know many parents my age that came from a family that was not affected by separation, divorce, or family struggles.   It seems almost “abnormal” for to come from a family that hasn’t had a huge struggle of some kind.

Looking back, there was one man who really stepped up to the challenge of being a father figure.  My grandpa, Roy, was the most amazing man I have ever met.

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He was a confident and genuine man.

He loved to socialize and interact with people.   He would talk to anyone and everyone.

He was “that guy.”

He didn’t drive a fancy car.  He didn’t have a huge home.  He was a blue collar worker and worked very hard.

The aspect I really respected about my Grandpa is he didn’t seek out to be liked.  As I remember, he really didn’t care if people liked him or not.  He didn’t seek validation or approval.  He was truly an old fashion man who stood for what he believed.

He loved people.  That was the exact reason people loved him.

What Legacy did he pass on?

He didn’t pass down money or anything materialistic.  He wasn’t able to pass down a trust fund or large inheritance.

He passed down the best and most valuable lessons of life…

Lesson  #1:  A Dad Legacy means you don’t need a lot money to live a happy life

My grandpa didn’t come from wealth, nor did he have a lot of money.  He worked hard.  His work ethic was above and beyond anyone I have ever met.  He drove a truck for 7up for 40 years.  He would wake up at 3:30am every morning just so he could get out on the road early enough to make it home for dinner with his family.  Money wasn’t important to him.  Time with his family was above anything materialistic.

Lesson #2:  Compliment others and mean it

My grandpa was such a generous man when it came to affection and compliments.  He was always there with a warm smile, a big hug, or a pat on the back when you needed it most.  I remember him always being so affectionate with my grandma.  Even at the end of his life (at 73 years old), he would hug and kiss my grandma.  He always told her how much he loved her.  You could tell he meant it.

Lesson #3:  Talk to strangers, be nice to everyone, and be a person who enjoys people

As a young boy, I went everywhere with my grandpa.  Looking back, I remember everyone (literally everyone) knowing him.  It didn’t matter if we were in church, shopping for groceries, or picking out donuts at our favorite donut shop (Old Town Donuts), people knew him.  Not only did they know him, but they would light up when they would see him.  He greeted everyone with a smile.  People genuinely enjoyed being around him.

Lesson #4:  Spend time with your family

Growing up, my grandpa always took me fishing.  Fishing was one of the joys of his life.  He would take me on weekend trips to go trout fishing when I was just five years old.  I remember being just a little guy and always tangling the fishing lines.  My grandpa would literally spend the majority of the time trying to untangle my line or bait my hook.  I remember feeling so bad that I tangled my line and I would apologize over and over.  He would just smile, look down at me, and say…

“It doesn’t matter what I am doing…as long as I am with you.  I don’t mind untangling your line, baiting your hook, or helping you pull in a big fish…as long as I am with you…I enjoy every minute.”

I learned so many lessons from my grandpa.  He was such an amazing man.

Thank you again for all your continued support for our Good Dad Project Community.  There are so many resources out there for moms, but very few for Dads who just want to make a difference.  If you haven’t become a free member of our community, please sign up.  Your email will never be rented, shared, or sold.  Our community is about helping Dads be their best…simple as that.

 

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All the best!

-Larry

If you enjoyed this, please give it a share on Facebook or Twitter.

 

3 ways to improve your sex life

Sex and Marriage…3 Essential Ways to Spark a Connection

According to a recent study, 58%  of married couples have sex 68 times (just over once a week) per year.  It also showed that 18% of married couples only have sex ten times (less than once a month) per year.

Are these numbers shocking?

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