How to Manage Your Thoughts and Emotions by Letting Sh*t Go with Todd Stottlemyre

Todd Stottlemyre

Todd Vernon Stottlemyre is an entrepreneur, business coach, author, and Major League Baseball player. During his youth, Todd watched his father, Mel Stottlemyre, pitch for the New York Yankees. Todd and his brothers grew up watching their father’s games, going to practices, and helping out with the team. Todd quickly fell in love with the game and went on to play 15 seasons of Major League Baseball as a pitcher. Stottlemyre played for the Toronto Blue Jays and was the starting pitcher for two world championships in 1992-1993. After Todd retired from baseball in 2002, he developed a passion for the stock market and co-founded a hedge fund in 2010. Since 2010, Todd has been co-running this business, writing books, and telling his story to listeners around the world.

Managing Your Thoughts and Emotions

Today, Todd is a husband, father, and self-made business and life coach who learned how to turn guilt into joy by one simple action – letting go. He shares valuable life lessons as well as emotionally captivating stories that demonstrate how he took control of his emotions and began living his life more intentionally.

Guilt can lead to the emotional baggage that is carried with us every day if we don’t learn to let it go. That guilt can drain the joy from our lives and bring us to dark places. Recognizing this guilt and letting go of your baggage can help you start the healing process with not only yourself but your relationships with others as well.

Todd recalls the guilt he carried with him for 12 years of his life and how he hated the man he saw in the mirror. Through a family loss, emotional baggage, his journey to fame, and the life-changing words of Harvey Dorfman, Todd was able to abolish the guilt he carried with him and live a more intentional, thoughtful life. 

 

What You’ll Learn:

Pursuing a Passion – Todd’s Dream Turns Into Reality

[9:43]

Todd introduces himself and talks about how his childhood led him to become a Major Leaguer and life coach.

[15:39]

Todd talks about how people’s opinions get in the way of other people’s dreams and it can ruin them. Todd and his brothers chose not to listen when people were constantly telling them that they would never be like their father.

[17:25]

Todd explains how we are born into the world of impossible, so why stop there? You have a whole life to live and you were born for greatness. 

[19:10]

OWN your dream. Don’t let someone else tell you what your dream is.

[22:10]

Todd talks about winning a second world championship with the Toronto Blue Jays. Todd looks like he is living the dream on the outside, but hates the guy staring back at him. He tells the story of his brother dying at 11 years old from Leukemia and how it affected his guilt for 12 years.

Turning Guilt Into Joy

[26:46]

Todd reached out to Harvey Dorfman, an American Mental Skills coach, for an hour meeting that turned into twelve. The two talked about Todd’s emotional baggage that was taking away from Stottlemyre’s happiness.

[29:52]

Stottlemyre mentions his book, “The Observer,” and the inspiration behind it.

[32:16]

Todd talks about how men become their pain if they bottle it up and never let it out. Yesterday’s emotional baggage becomes today’s emotional baggage if we carry it with us everyday.

[38:55]

Todd recalls focusing on things he couldn’t control and how it stole his joy.

Making the Most Out of Your Relationships

[44:30]

Todd emphasizes building wealth around God and your family. The path to true wealth is building upon your faith and relationships with your family, children, and others.

[51:57]

Todd’s rule for building relationships with others: Don’t expect things from other people, just appreciate them.

[52:26]

Emotion is the driver of all action.

[55:40]

“The Observer” book overview. Todd recalls the purpose of the book and why it was written the way it was.

1:06: 13 – New experiences are a valuable force because we have no know-how in the new experience, which teaches us valuable lessons

[1:07: 55]

COVID brought new perspectives on family, politics, race, and work.

[1:08: 26]

Do things with your family that you’ve never done before and experience new things. This builds upon your relationship with your family.

[1:09:05]

Experiencing a loss can be difficult. However, learning to let go and heal can allow our hearts to open up to new possibilities and feel their presence in our lives.

RELATED EPISODES:

How to Execute Major League Achievement—Exclusive Dad Edge Alliance Q&A with Todd Stottlemyre

Relentless Success Through Triumph and Tragedy with Todd Stottlemyre

Breaking the World of Impossible with Todd Stottlemyre

 


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Todd Stottlemyre’s Links

Todd Official

Inner Circle

Instagram

Facebook

YouTube

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emotional intelligence skills for men

Emotional Intelligence Skills for Men with Dr. Nick Sotelo

In this episode, we have invited Dr. Nick Sotelo, a coach and counselor. He is a leader in our Dad Edge Alliance and guides people to reaching their potential. He has succeeded in helping people achieve more in their careers and relationships.

Dr. Nick also helps men struggling with addiction, their identity, and their ability to connect well with spouses and children. Today we talk about emotional intelligence skills for men.

You will learn how to master your anger and patience, how to become more self-aware, and how to realize and reach your potential for an upgraded life!

What You’ll Learn

Relationship Pitfalls

[9:22]

Nick discusses the importance of the degree of knowledge and awareness. It’s about different styles of how families do certain things and blend them into a new relationship.

[10:26]

Building a relationship is new learning, and sometimes there come challenges that people should know what’s worth fighting for. Nick emphasizes the importance of awareness of what people are bringing into a relationship, especially on the front-end types.

Overcoming the Feeling of Brokenness

[15:32]

Finding people, especially with your family, or creating a connection to spiritual and religious institutions and asking or receiving guidance and mentorship around relationship issues, specifically communication, and learning what it takes to make a marriage work.

[16:36]

Nobody wants to view themselves as broken. But learning from a different perspective, it is essential to acknowledge brokenness, get over it and move on.

Realization and Acceptance

[17:28]

There is nothing wrong with being imperfect. The difference is that as being flawed, at a mastermind, people are humble and is always eager to learn and live a legendary life. In the group environment at a mastermind, a variety of people acts to learn from different experiences.

[20:50]

Nick shared that people should be allowed to show their vulnerabilities. He once was one of the guys who can’t accept that something is wrong and tell people that everything was fine.

[22:10]

In their call team statement, there is a saying that “we are men willing to do the work,” He believes that it is vital for people as accountability is one way to help someone forward.

Anger Issues

[28:04]

Nick studied the psychological side of feelings and emotions and how people will integrate them and deal with everyday frustrations that can cause anger.

[29:53]

Anger is a confusing feeling when connected to other emotions. He believes that part of the work is understanding what makes you happy, what makes you sad, what makes you afraid, and what makes you angry. He said that people are mad because other feelings could be active, and we are not aware of it.

Four Phases Components

[30:48]

People should figure out their thoughts and their feelings.

[31:58]

Learn to take some box breathing deep breaths and how to remove yourself from a situation. Also, learn how to trigger some helpful thoughts in your mind instead of clinging to the not so useful ideas.

[32:17]

Building up people’s resilience to anger is essential to him. Change the routine and change the media that you choose to take into your being every single day.

[33:05]

When enduring a problem with anger or a pattern with anger, learn to link it back to forgiveness. Either forgiveness for yourself, for something that you think that you’ve done, or forgiveness for other people along the way that have inflicted damage.

Dr. Nick Sotelo’s Links

nicksotelo.com

LinkedIn


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Resources

Fill out an application for The Dad Edge Alliance

The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

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FREE EMAIL SERIES: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

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become the master of your schedule

How to Become the Master of Your Schedule

Do you feel like a slave to your to-do list? Are the things you spend your time and energy on bringing you any closer to becoming the man you can be? Today we’re going to talk to an everyday dad about how to become the master of your schedule.

David Pickering is the married father of two and a member of the Dad Edge Alliance. He lived an average, comfortable life, but he didn’t feel like he was in charge of it. Every day was the same. He was “tubing down the river of life,” drifting wherever the current took him.

Learn what David did to take charge of his daily schedule, lose 60 pounds, and actively step into the bigger vision he has for himself and his family.

What You’ll Learn

  • How David unintentionally lost 60 pounds just by changing his daily habits
  • The importance having a daily routine
  • How to set the tone for the rest of the day
  • Being mindful and being intentional about your habits
  • The unexpected rewards of the #75Hard challenge
  • How he got his wife on board to do workouts with him
  • How to find the time for the requirements of #75Hard
  • How accountability partners help you experience breakthroughs
  • What kids will learn watching you discipline yourself
  • How to live through peer pressure or environments where you’re surrounded by your old bad habits, like drinking and junk food
  • How mastering your habits and your schedule can help you change lives

RELATED EPISODES:

Real AF Self-Discipline with Andy Frisella

Start Reaching Your Goals with an Accountability Partner

What It’s Like to Do the 75Hard Challenge


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If you’re enjoying the show, leave us an itunes reviewIf your review is chosen as the iTunes Review-of-the Week, we’ll send you the free book of your choice!

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Our biggest regrets in life happen
when we’ve lost our patience. 

how to have more patience

Stop Reacting and Start Living

Do the work. Make a plan. Follow along with simple, yet powerful exercises and tap into the patience that is within you.

Get the Patience eCourse
Plus 1 FREE Month in the Dad Edge Alliance

Create an action plan to help you thrive in life and build the legacy you want.

CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE


Resources

Fill out an application for The Dad Edge Alliance

The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE BOOKHERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook

We have Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

FREE chapter from THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE

FREE EBOOK: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

FREE EBOOK:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

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family leadership

The Process of Family Leadership—Dad Edge Alliance Exclusive Q&A with Errol Doebler

We are all going to go some day. What kind of culture do you want to leave behind for your family and the generations to come?

We have an intense experience for you today. Errol Doebler, former Navy SEAL and FBI Special Agent, is back on the show. He is a husband, a father of three, and the author of The Process, Art and Science of Leadership.

Errol participated in a live event with the Dad Edge Alliance, where more than 70 men had the opportunity to listen to his arsenal of family leadership training and got a chance to ask him questions on how to use the process of leadership to become strong leaders for their families.

Errol explains how the leadership strategies used for battle are the same we need to use in the boardroom and the home. In this behind-the-scenes peek into the Dad Edge Alliance, you will learn how to gain trust, earn respect, and form an unbreakable family team.

 

What You’ll Learn

  • Great teams (and families) are not made by who is on them, but how they operate.
  • It’s up to the leader (the father) to create a space where everyone feels like they can speak up.
  • Communication is the main part of the planning process. You need the team’s contributions.
  • We can unwittingly create silence. We have to break that down and develop an environment of psychological safety.
  • Each member gets equal input. Do not let a few dominate.
  • Teammates must be in tune with each other’s emotions and needs to be successful.
  • Before enforcing accountability, make it clear what kids have to be accountable for.
  • Autonomy—we want kids to take initiative. We establish what we want them to do and why we want them to do it. Then we let them tell us how.
  • What to do when you’ve blown up at your kids
  • Why we must apply the same mindset to times of calm as to times of chaos
  • How to regain trust and respect from your wife and/or family when you’ve lost it
  • How to reestablish leadership when you’ve given it up
  • How to execute even when you’re feeling fear
  • How to define and enforce codes of behavior

ERROL’S FULL INTERVIEW

The Process, Art, and Science of Leadership with Errol Doebler

 


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Errol Doebler’s Links

leader193.com

Facebook

Twitter

Instagram

YouTube

Amazon

Resources

Fill out an application for The Dad Edge Alliance

The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE BOOKHERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook

We have Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

FREE chapter from THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE

FREE EBOOK: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

FREE EBOOK:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Follow The Dad Edge


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The Disease of Busyness


Are you infected with the disease of busyness?

Many of us run on all cylinders, trying to cross the next item off our to do lists. Our days are full. We commit ourselves to the point of exhaustion. It feels like we’re accomplishing a lot, but weeks, months, years go by and we find ourselves stuck in the same place. Our health, business, and relationships are neglected. We want to move forward, but how can we possibly fit more in?

Busyness is a sneaky disease. In this episode we talk with Dad Edge Alliance member Dan Zehner, host of the Anthem of the Adventurer Podcast. Dan used busyness as a distraction to avoid doing what he needed to do in life. He was overweight, stress out, and disconnected from his family. Then he got real with himself.

Dan tells us about how he confronted his pain, discovered his purpose, and took ownership of his time. He is now living at the peak of his potential and you can too!

“We must stop using the excuse of having kids and a mortgage to hold us back from a life filled with adventure.”—Dan Zehner

What You’ll Learn

  • How Dan transformed his physical fitness over the period of six months
  • Emotional, mental, and physical endurance—when you practice resilience in one area, it applies to all of them.
  • What the disease of busyness looks and feels like
  • Why “hope” is not a strategy.
  • What to do when we plateau in life
  • How to push through resistance
  • Why we must define our true purpose
  • Perseverance produces character. Character produces hope.
  • Why accomplishments do not matter
  • Eliminating the hurry in our lives
  • How to stop being overcommitted
  • A gratitude exercise that will bring priorities into focus
  • The power of mementos and totems
  • Distracting ourselves from pain deprives us of profound moments of joy in life.
  • What to do with our “margin time”
  • Allowing ourselves time to do what we loved to do as kids
  • Addressing the disease of busyness—how is it working for you and how is it making you feel?
  • Make a list of where you’re investing your time and energy. Ask yourself, is it helpful, or are you being unkind to yourself?

Perseverance produces character. Character produces hope.

MENTIONED EPISODES:

How to Break the Cycle of the Fixed Mindset with Larry Yatch

How to Accelerate Personal Achievement and Life Fulfillment with Jack Canfield

Raising Kids with the Dichotomy of Leadership with Jocko Willink

Extreme Ownership for Fathers with Leif Babin

How to Create and Activate Your Heroic Alter Ego with Todd Herman – Exclusive Dad Edge Alliance Q&A

 


Leave an iTunes review.
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If you’re enjoying the show, leave us an itunes reviewIf your review is chosen as the iTunes Review-of-the Week, we’ll send you the free book of your choice!

What to do: send an email to support@gooddadproject.com notifying us about your review, your mailing address, and your choice of a guest book from our Books Page!

Thanks for the support!

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Dan Zehner’s Links

Website

Facebook

Resources

Fill out an application for The Dad Edge Alliance

The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE BOOK HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook

We have Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

FREE chapter from THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE

FREE EBOOK: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

FREE EBOOK:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Follow The Dad Edge


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