To the Beat of Your Own Drum

Are you living as your true self? Or have you built your life around someone else’s idea of who you’re supposed to be? And if you feel like you’re living a lie, how can you drown out the noise of the world and march to the beat of your own drum?

Today we have an everyday dad and extraordinary person from the Dad Edge Alliance. Chris Lesso is the founder of Your Best Self Through Drumming and is an expert on optimizing the power of drumming to improve focus, confidence, and self-expression.

Through the metaphor of music, Chris explains how each of us has a different drum beat and how we can connect with our best selves by letting our voices be heard. He teaches us how we can become aware of our unique rhythms so that we can better lead our families and keep the beat for our own song of life.

Chris Lesso

Chris Lesso is an expert on optimizing the power of drumming to improve focus, confidence, and self expression in music and in life. LTR (Life Through Rhythm) is an attitude and way of life, brought forth through drumming compositions, musical performance, and education, using drumming as a force to reach our fullest potential and live the art of possibility.

Chris began his journey early, drumming and playing piano at the age of 7, and has never looked back. He has studied with world renowned educators Dom Famularo, Jim Chapin, Jim Blackley, and in India with Swapan Chaudhuri. A lifelong student of the craft, he sought out to play with the best musicians in the world, touring internationally with Wild T & The Spirit, Cavalia Odysseo, and many others.

Combining a fascination of history with pushing the edges of future evolution, Chris leads his own band modus factor, featuring world renowned musicians Brownman (Jay Z, Dave Matthews Band) and Ian DeSouza (Juno Award winning Sisters Euclid). Described as ‘electro ambient bedlam’, modus factor uses improvisation and daring reinvention to create an energized sound all its own, drawing on textures from jazz, electronic, and world music.

A born teacher, Chris takes his LTR (Life Through Rhythm) philosophy around the world to empower drummers getting to their next level, but also to businesses looking for an edge in using drumming to come together as an energized team, using the power of flow states to rise above the competition.

What You’ll Learn

  • We all have a personal rhythm in life that includes our habits, our thoughts, and our speech
  • Drumming teaches us to be assertive leaders because drummers must keep the beat for the rest of the band
  • The f-word we must teach our kids
  • How playing music helps you focus, develop confidence and self-worth
  • Cultivating self-expression to grow confidence
  • Asking yourself, “What do you have to say?”
  • The maxims of the practice of drumming – movement (physical exertion), rhythm (daily practice), discipline (becoming a disciple of your best self), being childlike (not childish)
  • Controlling your emotional state
  • Why drumming keeps you humble
  • How learning something knew puts you back into your kids’ shoes, helping you relate to them when they’re learning something they’ve never done before
  • How learning an instrument like drums grows new neurons and muscle memory
  • Developing patience and staying fresh and in the moment
  • Letting your kids watching you do something your passionate about
  • Urgency is good, but self-importance is not.
  • Detach and welcome obstacles and circumstances beyond our control
  • Why smiling at someone is being creative
  • We’re all going to look back on this crisis and think about how we showed up during this time. What are you going to remember?

 

MENTIONED EPISODES:

Extreme Ownership for Fathers with Leif Babin

Raising Kids with the Dichotomy of Leadership with Jocko Willink


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Chris Lesso’s Links

chrislesso.com

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THRIVE IN THE FACE OF UNCERTAINTY

Register for the Dad Edge Virtual Summit

Dad Edge Virtual Summit 2020

IT’S TIME TO REINVENT HOW WE SHOW UP FOR OUR FAMILIES

Coronavirus is forcing our evolution as fathers.  We are all going to build a whole new set of superpowers.  And these superpowers are needed right now.  For many of us, we are multiplying our future ability to serve, exponentially.

YOU WILL NOT WANT TO MISS THIS.

Guest Speakers

Dr. Meg Meeker
New York Times Bestselling Author of “Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters” and “HERO”
Anthony Trucks
Former NFL Football Player and American Ninja Warrior
Aaron Walker
Founder of View From the Top and bestselling author of “View from the Top” and coming soon “Isolation is the Enemy of Excellence.”
Dominic Quartuccio
Bestselling author of “Design Your Future.”

CHOOSE YOUR PACKAGE

 

Self-compassion instead of self-sacrifice

Self-Compassion Instead of Self-Sacrifice

At the Dad Edge Alliance, we’re disrupting the default settings of fatherhood so that we can go from living ordinary to extraordinary lives. One of the reasons we men become frustrated and burned out is because we feel it’s our job to shoulder the load for everyone. But if we practice self-compassion instead of self-sacrifice, not only will we feel happier, but we’ll also find we have more to give to everyone in our lives.

Today we interview another dad in the trenches. John Culford is a recent Dad Edge Alliance member who’s been married for fourteen years and is the father of two sons, aged twelve and thirteen.

John shares his challenges with communication, understanding, and connection with his wife and kids. He reveals what strategies he’s implementing to make his family grow closer during quarantine and beyond. He also tells us how getting into the habit of being kind to himself, claiming space, and opening up about his struggles with his family his secret to staying grounded and moving forward.

You don’t necessarily have to sacrifice yourself for the benefit of others.—John Culford, DEA member

What You’ll Learn

  • John’s experience with a pre-marriage bootcamp
  • We he’s learned that no conflict is really resolved
  • How to listen effectively during disagreements so that your spouse knows she’s being heard
  • Why Joh is setting aside 1 hour a week with his wife to talk about things they don’t know about each other.
  • Strip down to the facts of a challenging problem or source of stress. We often don’t know why we’re really bothered by something.
  • Detach from feelings when thinking of solutions to a problem. Emotion creates noise that distracts us from the best path forward.
  • How to parent a child with anxiety
  • How to be there for your kids when they’ve matured and don’t open up to you any more
  • How to intentionally make time for important discussions so it’s best for everyone
  • Why you must remove “buts” from your responses
  • How to show your kids to turn challenging situations like coronavirus into a positive experience they look back and remember in a positive light.
  • How to explain to your family when you need time alone.

Be kind to yourself. You’re going to fail. As put together as you think you are it’s okay to make mistakes. Let your family become part of that story.—John Culford, DEA member

 


Leave an iTunes review.
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If you’re enjoying the show, leave us an itunes reviewIf your review is chosen as the iTunes Review-of-the Week, we’ll send you the free book of your choice!

What to do: send an email to support@gooddadproject.com notifying us about your review, your mailing address, and your choice of a guest book from our Books Page!

Thanks for the support!

CLICK HERE TO LEAVE YOUR REVIEW.



 


THRIVE IN THE FACE OF UNCERTAINTY

Register for the Dad Edge Virtual Summit

Dad Edge Virtual Summit 2020

IT’S TIME TO REINVENT HOW WE SHOW UP FOR OUR FAMILIES

Coronavirus is forcing our evolution as fathers.  We are all going to build a whole new set of superpowers.  And these superpowers are needed right now.  For many of us, we are multiplying our future ability to serve, exponentially.

YOU WILL NOT WANT TO MISS THIS.

Guest Speakers

Dr. Meg Meeker
New York Times Bestselling Author of “Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters” and “HERO”
Anthony Trucks
Former NFL Football Player and American Ninja Warrior
Aaron Walker
Founder of View From the Top and bestselling author of “View from the Top” and coming soon “Isolation is the Enemy of Excellence.”
Dominic Quartuccio
Bestselling author of “Design Your Future.”

CHOOSE YOUR PACKAGE

your best self

Your Best Self: Initiate the Transformation


Your best self exists somewhere in the future. How can you initiate the transformation and bridge the gap between who you are now and the man you are capable of becoming?

Today, we have everyday dad Ben Killoy on The Dad Edge. He is a long-time Dad Edge Alliance member and is now one of our call team leaders. Ben is a military veteran turned blogger and motivational speaker. He’s founded the Military Veteran Dad Podcast, and his mission is to bring every dad both physically and mentally back home to his family.

Ben talks about how he broke free from the fear and resistance that was preventing him from living to his full potential. He explains how he cultivated the self-awareness and self-love to become strong enough to lead himself and his family. He also shares how he’s grateful to be in a place to help other men to access the truth beneath their fears and initiate the transformation to their best selves.

If you want a result in your life you never had, you need to do something you never done.

The amount of people you’re talking to is directly correlated to the amount of opportunity you feel in your life. You can’t create new opportunity unless you’re talking to people.—Ben Killoy

What You’ll Learn

  • The moment Ben realized that no one is going to care when he is no longer around.
  • The power of connecting with others for opportunity.
  • Social media cannot replace human connection.
  • Men have a tendency to numb their feelings, keeping them stuck. Once you have access to the feelings, the dam breaks and you can move forward.
  • You never know the power of the words you say. You can move mountains.
  • What Ben learned about the meaning of masculinity
  • If you don’t love your past, your current situation, or the future you’re headed to, you can’t bring love into other people’s lives without some expectation of them meeting your needs.
  • When your outside doesn’t match your inside.
  • How to debunk and neutralize old stories you have about yourself.
  • How to grow “deep roots” to get you through any storm
  • You have everything inside already. You just have to believe it is there.
  • Look forward to meeting the new version of yourself.
  • Success doesn’t happen when conditions are perfect.
  • Advice for men who want to grow but are afraid to leave a comfortable (yet unfulfilling) life
  • Pick something you’ve always wanted to do, start it, and suck at it.
  • Fear holds you back, but love conquers fear.
  • Why you can’t be strong for your spouse if you don’t love yourself.
  • How to open up new possibilities for yourself through intentional challenge
  • How to have real conversations that lift you up
  • If you don’t have a tribe, you will always feel like something is missing.
  • Why you should learn how to talk to strangers
  • Using the coronavirus pandemic as a time to reflect and grow

MENTIONED EPISODES:

The Challenges of Being a Military Veteran Dad

The Secrets to Achieving Wildly Important Goals with Mark Divine

TRANSFORMED: A Navy SEAL’s Unlikely Journey to Defying All Odds with Remi Adeleke


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If you’re enjoying the show, leave us an itunes reviewIf your review is chosen as the iTunes Review-of-the Week, we’ll send you the free book of your choice!

What to do: send an email to support@gooddadproject.com notifying us about your review, your mailing address, and your choice of a guest book from our Books Page!

Thanks for the support!

CLICK HERE TO LEAVE YOUR REVIEW.

 




Ben Killoy’s Links

militaryveterandad.com

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THRIVE IN THE FACE OF UNCERTAINTY

Register for the Dad Edge Virtual Summit

Dad Edge Virtual Summit 2020

IT’S TIME TO REINVENT HOW WE SHOW UP FOR OUR FAMILIES

Coronavirus is forcing our evolution as fathers.  We are all going to build a whole new set of superpowers.  And these superpowers are needed right now.  For many of us, we are multiplying our future ability to serve, exponentially.

YOU WILL NOT WANT TO MISS THIS.

Guest Speakers

Dr. Meg Meeker
New York Times Bestselling Author of “Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters” and “HERO”
Anthony Trucks
Former NFL Football Player and American Ninja Warrior
Aaron Walker
Founder of View From the Top and bestselling author of “View from the Top” and coming soon “Isolation is the Enemy of Excellence.”
Dominic Quartuccio
Bestselling author of “Design Your Future.”

CHOOSE YOUR PACKAGE


What did you think of the show?

What was your biggest take away?

Tag us when you share on social media!

#TheDadEdge

Twitter @gooddadprojct

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enemy of excellence

Isolation: The Enemy of Excellence—TDE Exclusive with Aaron Walker


Today fan favorite and a legend our community Aaron “Big A” Walker is on to have a live discussion with our members.

Aaron Walker is the president and founder of View from the Top, an Iron Sharpens Iron Mastermind group that goes beyond success to a life of significance.

Aaron talks about why isolation is the enemy of excellence and how the power of mastermind groups to accelerate our growth, success, and happiness is unrivaled. He explains why we need a community of strong men to do life with and gives us examples of how a group of trusted advisors can help us through the toughest spots in our lives.

Aaron talks about what our spouses and kids really need from us and how to show up big for them with a servant leader mindset. He also tells us how to be courageous during crisis, as well as when to lean into our tribe to survive the pitfalls and mistakes that we’re usually afraid to talk about.

“Isolation is the enemy of excellence.”—Aaron Walker

What You’ll Learn

  • Aaron had been in a mastermind every week for 21 years.
  • The biggest pain point men bring up is that they are going through life alone and have no one to help them make decisions.
  • The benefit of being in a mastermind, not just for a few months, but long-term
  • We can’t give advice to someone if we don’t know them and their story
  • A mastermind is a place to get counsel, affirmation, and encouragement
  • We also need trusted advisors who give the advice we don’t want to hear, but desperately need.
  • Sometimes we need a swift kick from people who are not afraid to tell us when we’re wrong.
  • Masterminds give us perspective. We can’t see our own blind spots.
  • Why men isolate, especially when times get tough
  • Doing the right thing is hard. We need other men to hold us accountable.
  • We have to be vulnerable to be courageous
  • A real man’s man is not a stubborn tough guy. A real man’s man is open, emotional, and ready to learn.
  • If you want people to be authentic with you, you have to let the guard down first.
  • Do things for your wife or children to be helpful, not noticed or rewarded.
  • In business—stop trying to make the sale. Instead, focus on adding more value. Then business will come naturally.
  • Becoming a servant leader in work AND at home
  • The little things we can do for our wives that will show them how much we love them
  • What men are most worried about during the coronavirus pandemic
  • The growing focus on spirituality
  • A positive mindset is not natural but must be learned.
  • Aaron’s best advice for dads who struggle with patience and empathy

“Don’t come home with a wallet full of money and a house full of strangers.”—Aaron Walker


MENTIONED EPISODES:

Working to Live, Not Living to Work with Aaron Walker

The Ultimate Guide to Work/Life Balance with Aaron Walker

How to Thrive in the Face of Uncertainty


Aaron Walker’s Links

viewfromthetop.com

Facebook

Twitter

Instagram

Amazon


THRIVE IN THE FACE OF UNCERTAINTY

Register for the Dad Edge Virtual Summit

Dad Edge Virtual Summit 2020

IT’S TIME TO REINVENT HOW WE SHOW UP FOR OUR FAMILIES

Coronavirus is forcing our evolution as fathers.  We are all going to build a whole new set of superpowers.  And these superpowers are needed right now.  For many of us, we are multiplying our future ability to serve, exponentially.

YOU WILL NOT WANT TO MISS THIS.

Guest Speakers

Dr. Meg Meeker
New York Times Bestselling Author of “Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters” and “HERO”
Anthony Trucks
Former NFL Football Player and American Ninja Warrior
Aaron Walker
Founder of View From the Top and bestselling author of “View from the Top” and coming soon “Isolation is the Enemy of Excellence.”
Dominic Quartuccio
Bestselling author of “Design Your Future.”

CHOOSE YOUR PACKAGE

 


What did you think of the show?

What was your biggest take away?

Tag us when you share on social media!

#TheDadEdge

Twitter @gooddadprojct

Instagram @thedadedge

alter ego todd herman

How to Create and Activate Your Heroic Alter Ego with Todd Herman – Exclusive Dad Edge Alliance Q&A


Todd Herman is the author of the wildly popular bestselling book, The Alter Ego Effect, in which he explains the fastest way to transcend fear and self-limiting beliefs by creating alter egos.

In an exclusive Q&A session with Dad Edge Alliance members, Todd reveals how to develop alter egos for the different playing fields of life, and how to activate our secret identities to instantly show up the way we want in the toughest situations. He also talks about how to introduce this method to our kids.

Todd Herman’s tools and strategies will blow your mind and change your life. Get ready to step into your heroic self!

Todd Herman and The Alter Ego Effect

What if the games you played as a child were the greatest gift to helping you achieve more today?

Before stage fright, impostor syndrome, emotional baggage, and the other dubious gifts of adulthood, everyone pretended to be a superhero, a favorite athlete, an inspiring entertainer, a nurse, a firefighter, a lion or whatever captured their imagination. And yet, that natural creativity is slowly squeezed out of us because we think it’s childish or it’s ‘time to grow up.’ Now, Todd Herman—backed by scientific research and countless stories from the real world—will show you how to tap into the human imagination to unleash a new version of yourself, ready-made to kick-ass.

Herman has been coaching champions in every field for over twenty years, and he’s helped them bring out their Heroic Self to transcend the forces pulling them into the Ordinary World. While anyone attempting ambitious things faces adversity, resistance and challenges, Herman, asks a new question: “Who or what needs to show up to make success inevitable?”

In The Alter Ego Effect, Herman shows you how to activate the Heroic Self already nested inside of each of us, through countless stories from salespeople, executives, entertainers, athletes, entrepreneurs, creatives and historical figures. He reveals that you may not be using those traits in the moments when you need them the most. From the creative entrepreneur who resisted their craft, to the accomplished military officer who wanted to be a warmer dad at home, Todd Herman’s clients have discovered there is no end to the parts of their lives they could improve by using Alter-Egos.

What You’ll Learn

  • The surprising secret to those who perform consistently at top levels—maintaining a level of playfulness.
  • The identities that can limit you
  • How to turn off your work mode or ambition mode when you get home for your kids and spouse
  • Changing the identity is the fastest way to shift performance.
  • Todd Herman’s Dad Alter Ego is based on a combination of Mr. Rogers and his own dad
  • How to use alter egos as a form of honor, not being fake
  • The most powerful way to trigger an identity change are things that we wear
  • Choosing totems, artifacts, and uniforms
  • The mistakes we make as parents when it comes to talking to our kids about their performance
  • The two most important things we can do for our children to encourage the right mindset
  • Why you must allow kids to choose their own alter egos
  • How to choose your behavior according to a future version of yourself
  • Why you should not protect your kids from feeling uncomfortable things. They must learn how to experience and process negative emotions.
  • Making sure that when we’re framing something for our kids, we’re not introducing a problem for them that wasn’t even in their world
  • 80% of our 1-on-1 time with kids ends at the age of twelve, so we must take advantage of spending time with them in their younger years.
  • Number one reason why kids don’t quit activity because they don’t want to lose the one on one car time with their parent
  • The difference between habits and rituals and why rituals are important for success


MENTIONED EPISODES:

The Alter Ego Effect with Todd Herman

3 Questions to Ask Your Kid Every Night


Leave an iTunes review.
Get a FREE book!

If you’re enjoying the show, leave us an itunes reviewIf your review is chosen as the iTunes Review-of-the Week, we’ll send you the free book of your choice!

What to do: send an email to support@gooddadproject.com notifying us about your review, your mailing address, and your choice of a guest book from our Books Page!

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Todd Herman

toddherman.me

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Amazon

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