Stop Being the “Nice Guy” with Dr. Robert Glover

Many of us take pride in being the “nice guy.” But could being the nice guy be ruining our lives?

We are all probably guilty of Nice Guy Syndrome on some level. We sometimes give only to receive in a passive attempt to get what we want without directly asking for it. We avoid conflict to get the acceptance, validation, approval, and even the sex that we need. Some of us might not even realize we suffer from Nice Guy Syndrome and wonder why we are anxious and unhappy.

Dr. Robert Glover is back on The Dad Edge for a discussion we all need to hear. He talks about how to stop being dependent on external things for our happiness. He shows us how to reclaim our identities after losing ourselves in relationships. He also explains why we need to get comfortable with our existential fears to become empowered men.

Stop being a nice guy and start living true to yourself!

If you have to give up anything that’s important to you to be in a relationship, it’s going to create a toxic environment.

Dr. Robert Glover

Dr. Robert Glover, author of No More Mr. Nice Guy: A Proven Plan For Getting What You Want in Love, Sex and Life. Dr. Glover is an internationally recognized authority on the Nice Guy Syndrome. He is a frequent guest on radio talk shows and has been featured in numerous local and national publications. As a result of his work, Dr. Glover has helped thousands of Nice Guys transform from being passive, resentful victims to empowered, integrated males. Along with these personal changes have come similar transformations in these men’s professional careers and intimate relationships. Dr. Glover is the creator of Dating Essentials for Men, the director of TPI University, and a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in the state of Washington. Dr. Glover divides his year between Bellevue, WA and Puerto Vallarta, Mexico.

What You’ll Learn

  • Nice Guy Syndrome, at its core, is codependency.
  • Borrowed functioning means your wellbeing depends on the happiness of those around you.
  • It’s an anxiety and shame-based disorder. You manage people and situations to avoid anxiety or feelings of worthlessness.
  • Losing ourselves in relationships is not healthy, even though we’ve been taught that it’s noble to throw ourselves on the sword for our wives and kids.
  • The difference between fusion and differentiation
  • What most of us call “intimacy” is losing ourselves in another person so much that there is no distinct otherness anymore.
  • Fusion kills sexual passion.
  • The “Alpha Male” in human society who takes all is a myth. Things (including women) were shared.
  • Marriage emerged much more recently with the patriarchy.
  • Up until 100 years ago, marriage was an economical arrangement. Romantic love is a new idea.
  • Pair bonding in modern times doesn’t work well for happiness.
  • What you can count on in a relationship is that your childhood baggage is going to reveal itself.
  • Tension is healthy. Anytime there is tension, there is growth.
  • It used to take a whole tribe to meet our needs. Expecting one person to fulfill all our needs is impossible and unfair.
  • Differentiation is two complete adults who choose to be together.
  • If we are acting as an independent person, we are more attractive to the opposite sex.
  • Almost no one is sexually monogamous, even if they aren’t physically cheating on their spouse.
  • Men give up control in their marriage and then get resentful. Then we sneak around to get our needs met.
  • Friends are often the first thing men sacrifice.
  • Angst from being disconnection from our tribe
  • It’s human nature to try to find connection because we’re afraid of disappearing into nothingness. Practice getting comfortable with existential fears to be more self-reliant.
  • Men load up their to-do lists, don’t get everything done, go to bed stressed, and wake up the next day with even more to do. If we stay busy, we don’t have to feel anything.
  • Learn to be with stillness.
  • Schedule unscheduled time. Build chunks of time into your day for unscheduled things and things that matter.
  • Appreciate life right now. Today is the best day of your life.

 

RELATED EPISODES:

Love Languages and Other Marriage Tips for the Pandemic with Gary Chapman

No More Mr. Nice Guy with Dr. Robert Glover

Why Nice Guys Don’t Get Their Needs Met

 


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art of masculinity

The Art of Masculinity with Johnny Elsasser


If we don’t know who we are or what’s important to us, we will be driven by outside forces and will lack the strength to show up in our lives with purpose and integrity.

This can lead to a feeling of being lost, powerless, trapped, and alone. Worst of all, it can cause us to dislike the man in the mirror—if we can even recognize him at all.

Today’s guest is Johnny Elsasser. He is a former Army Ranger, a men’s leadership coach, and the host of The Art of Masculinity podcast. He is going to tell us how to create a Masculine Blueprint so that we can identify what kind of men we want to become. In living by our own code, we will always know who we are and where we stand.

Feel the power of living as the person you really are.

Johnny Elsasser

John served in the Elite 2nd Battalion 75th Ranger Regiment with 4 combat tours between Iraq and Afghanistan, and protected the U.S. Ambassador to Iraq for 5 years out of Baghdad. He lost his own sense of purpose when he came back to the U.S. full time and became depressed and alone. This emptiness ended in divorce.

Today, John’s found new purpose in starting his own podcast to shed the light of how alpha men struggle and how they can together. He’s been featured in podcasts such as Tuff Love, Destined to Be, Think Yourself Healthy, and others to teach men how to build a strong foundation in authentic masculinity. John Elsasser is truly on a mission to help as many men as possible own their masculinity in the way that honors them.

The Art of Masculinity

Through a quickly evolving world we are living in today, most men were shown at a young age to act, feel, and conduct their lives in a certain way. The Art of Maculinity helps empower men to embrace both forms of energy—the Masculine and Feminine—so that they can step out of their hard shells and create a life where there’s equal strength and toughness while still retaining fluidity and softness.

What You’ll Learn

  • How to transition out of occupations you identify with
  • If you lack direction, you will succumb to dark places.
  • You feel less than others when you don’t know who you are
  • Look into your subconscious. You’re acting on things you didn’t choose.
  • Knowing who you are, you can through anything.
  • Live and pay attention to the journey. You are having experiences you should be enjoying.
  • Drop the ego to evolve.
  • The toxicity of the bravado mentality
  • Your Masculine Blueprint:
    • Where were your values? Do they serve you right now? Keep the ones that still hold true. Get rid of the ones you don’t need anymore.
    • Look at whom you admire. What traits do they have?
    • Combine your old values that still serve you with the new ones you want.
    • Choose 3-5 of these traits to define the man you truly want to be.
  • You will never have regrets if you live as who you are. You will always love the man in the mirror.

Your Masculine Blueprint Challenge

What is your masculine blueprint? Share it on Instagram and tag us @jonnyelsasser and @thedadedge and we’ll share it in our story!


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become the master of your schedule

How to Become the Master of Your Schedule

Do you feel like a slave to your to-do list? Are the things you spend your time and energy on bringing you any closer to becoming the man you can be? Today we’re going to talk to an everyday dad about how to become the master of your schedule.

David Pickering is the married father of two and a member of the Dad Edge Alliance. He lived an average, comfortable life, but he didn’t feel like he was in charge of it. Every day was the same. He was “tubing down the river of life,” drifting wherever the current took him.

Learn what David did to take charge of his daily schedule, lose 60 pounds, and actively step into the bigger vision he has for himself and his family.

What You’ll Learn

  • How David unintentionally lost 60 pounds just by changing his daily habits
  • The importance having a daily routine
  • How to set the tone for the rest of the day
  • Being mindful and being intentional about your habits
  • The unexpected rewards of the #75Hard challenge
  • How he got his wife on board to do workouts with him
  • How to find the time for the requirements of #75Hard
  • How accountability partners help you experience breakthroughs
  • What kids will learn watching you discipline yourself
  • How to live through peer pressure or environments where you’re surrounded by your old bad habits, like drinking and junk food
  • How mastering your habits and your schedule can help you change lives

RELATED EPISODES:

Real AF Self-Discipline with Andy Frisella

Start Reaching Your Goals with an Accountability Partner

What It’s Like to Do the 75Hard Challenge


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Our biggest regrets in life happen
when we’ve lost our patience. 

how to have more patience

Stop Reacting and Start Living

Do the work. Make a plan. Follow along with simple, yet powerful exercises and tap into the patience that is within you.

Get the Patience eCourse
Plus 1 FREE Month in the Dad Edge Alliance

Create an action plan to help you thrive in life and build the legacy you want.

CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE


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andy frisella

Real AF Self-Discipline with Andy Frisella


Today we are beyond excited to have Andy Frisella on The Dad Edge! This interview is the favorite above all other episodes.

If you don’t already know, Andy Frisella hosted the #1 business and success podcast in the world, The MFCEO project, and is the creator of 1st Phorm supplements. Andy is also the host of the Real AF Podcast and the founder of the #75Hard mental and physical fitness challenge.

With a big voice, big personality, and big heart, Andy Frisella, gets real AF about his struggles. He reveals that he naturally is a weak and lazy person, and that only by learning the skill of self-discipline has he developed his unstoppable work ethic and hustle.

He talks about why health must be our priority and how the #75Hard challenge develops the self-discipline we need to accomplish everything we want to do in life.

He also tells us how to practice extreme time management, how to develop true self-confidence, and what legacy really means.

Andy shares stuff in this show that you haven’t heard on any other podcast. Get ready to get real AF about life!

“If you can master the art of feeling stressed but still getting your shit done, you start to become real dangerous.”—Andy Frisella

Andy Frisella

Andy Frisella is an entrepreneur, bestselling author,  highly sought after consultant and public speaker.

Andy is the industry leading expert at customer loyalty, creating fanatical culture and building brick-and-motor and online direct-to-consumer retail businesses.

He has been featured in Inc., Entrepreneur & Forbes Magazine.  From 2015-2019 he hosted The MFCEO Project, the #1 business and success podcast in the world.

On his popular new podcast, REAL AF with Andy Frisella, he and his guests discuss, debate and laugh their way through trending topics and hot-button issues.

“Stand up for what is right, no matter what it costs you.”—Andy Frisella

What You’ll Learn

  • As men, the first thing we shelve is our health. We think we have to throw ourselves on the sword for our families.
  • Everything in life is built from health and discipline.
  • Controlling your hunger for food is a good tool to build discipline.
  • If you can’t control what you put in your mouth, you’re not likely to control anything else.
  • Success is not an excuse to let yourself go.
  • Take negativity and harness it for productive action.
  • Boundaries—don’t feel guilty taking care of yourself.
  • You don’t have to spend energy on people who are not operating on the same level as you.
  • You can learn from bad parenting in your past.
  • Why Andy’s pissed off at men right now
  • Why men today have to recalibrate the way we look at love
  • What masculine energy means to Andy
  • There is no way to please everyone on social media (and in life). The more you try, the more you lose respect from the people who appreciate you as you are.
  • 75Hard helps you more than just by making you look better. It makes you mentally powerful.
  • Why 75 Hard enhances your sex life (and it’s not just because you’re in shape).
  • How to become addicted to strength instead of a good time
  • How self-discipline develops true confidence
  • How a challenge like 75 Hard helps you develop extreme time management
  • Andy’s 4-phase year-long program
  • Your feelings are irrelevant to your results. If you can push through in spite of how you feel, you will be unstoppable.
  • All the problems we see in the world are individual problems. We work on ourselves to help the world.
  • The truth of why Andy is not having kids
  • What legacy really means

RELATED EPISODES

What It’s Like to Do the 75Hard Challenge

Start Reaching Your Goals with an Accountability Partner

How to Optimize the 5 Dimensions of Manhood


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If you’re enjoying the show, leave us an itunes reviewIf your review is chosen as the iTunes Review-of-the Week, we’ll send you the free book of your choice!

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andyfrisella.com

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75 Hard Challenge

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How to Become a Game Changing Dad

How to Become a Game Changing Dad

We only get one chance to be a dad, but life gets busy and sometimes we barely have time to think about what we’re doing. It’s easy to get wrapped up in work and shuttling kids off to sports and activities without mindfully taking action to level up when we can.

Today we have Dad Edge Alliance member Ray Matz on the show. He is the author of Game Changing Dads: Get Off The Bench and Into The Game! He is a husband and a father to three who talks about what we can do to get off the bench and take small actions for big improvements in our roles as fathers, husbands, and leaders.

'The tough guy to me is the guy who puts his guard down and listens.' —@RayMatz #dads #men #fathers #parenting #fatherhood Click To Tweet

 Get the Book


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Ray Matz’s Links

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