4 Questions to Crush Self-Sabotaging Thoughts

4 Questions to Crush Self-Sabotaging Thoughts

In our last episode, Wes Chapman shared his horrific story of trauma and how his whole life he had been told that he would never be a normal, successful, happy person because of what he went through. Wes healed and soared above his past. If he believed in his heart what all the doctors and adults told him, he would never be able to become the extraordinary man he is today.

It’s bad enough when other people are putting us down, but for many of us, our worst enemy is ourselves. We tell ourselves we’re not good enough, that we’re not capable, or that we’re inadequate. This negative self-talk silently kills us every day.

In today’s short episode I give four questions we can ask ourselves to crush self-sabotaging thoughts.

Crush your self-sabotaging thoughts with these 4 questions. #dads #men Click To Tweet

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==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

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MENTIONED EPISODE: Wake Up the Hero with Wes Chapman

The Mask of Masculinity with Lewis Howes

The Mask of Masculinity with Lewis Howes

Today we have an unbelievable episode with Lewis Howes. For those of you who don’t know him, Lewis Howes is the host of the hugely popular The School of Greatness podcast and the author of the New York Times bestselling book, The School of Greatness.

Lewis Howes is one of the most sought after speakers today and has appeared all over the media, including just recently on Ellen. His new book is called The Mask of Masculinity, and Lewis Howes completely sheds his mask for us in this show.

You will hear things that will shock you as well as things that will inspire you. This is one episode you will never forget.

The more I talk about things that used to be shameful for me, the less they own me. @LewisHowes Click To Tweet

Lewis Howes

Lewis Howes had big dreams to be an athlete. His goal in life was to get paid for having fun and he was on the road to his dreams, making it into arena football and setting his sights on the NFL, until a wrist injury ended his career.

His whole identity revolved around sports, and at 23 years old with a massive ego, he had no idea what to do with himself. His family was troubled and his father, who had been his biggest supporter during his sports career, got into a tragic accident that left him mentally and emotionally stunted. Lewis had to learn how to be a man on his own, and took the past decade to reinvent himself into the person you see today.

Share the thing that you’re most afraid of in a way that makes sense for you. @LewisHowes Click To Tweet

Show Highlights

  • How both the good and bad sides of his father shaped him.
  • What his parents miserable relationship taught him about marriage.
  • How his brother went to prison for over four years when Lewis was just 8-years-old.
  • How both of his sisters attempted suicide.
  • How he was raped when he was a little boy.
  • The moment he spoke about his sexual abuse and how it freed him.
  • Why he was terrified to write his book, The Mask of Masculinity.
  • Why woman would also want to read The Mask of Masculinity.
  • How holding onto shame and secrets becomes a man’s prison.
  • Why he has no desire to have kids … yet.
Be the alien that you are, and find the other aliens that accept you. @LewisHowes Click To Tweet

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The thing you fear the most, wear it. @LewisHowes Click To Tweet

Connect with Lewis Howes

lewishowes.com

maskofmasculinity.com

Twitter

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Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Daddy Will Always Love and Protect You

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Dad Edge Alliance

Why Nice Guys Don't Get Their Needs Met

Why Nice Guys Don’t Get Their Needs Met

Dr. Robert Glover, author of No More Mr. Nice Guy, dropped some knowledge bombs on us in our last episode. He also did a live Q & A with our Dad Edge Alliance membership group. Today you will hear a clip of highlights from the call itself as Dr. Robert Glover expands on why nice guys don’t get their needs met.

Note: Our free Dad Edge Facebook group grows by 200 guys a week, but if you want to step up game even more, check out our Dad Edge Alliance membership group where we have weekly talks, community calls, and a elite guest speakers like Dr. Robert Glover every month.

Mr. Nice Guy’s 3 Covert Contracts

  1. If I’m a good guy, I will be liked and loved (and women will desire me).
  2. If I meet other people’s needs without them having to ask, they will meet my needs without me having to ask.
  3. If I do everything right, I’ll have a smooth problem free life.

The number one way to stop the effects of Nice Guy Syndrome is to assume the responsibility of taking better care of ourselves and making sure our own needs are met.

Each of us is like a big cup that only holds so much. Nice guys take care of everyone else and hope that others will fill them back up. We can’t figure out why we do everything right and yet fail in our work, love, and sex life. We become more desperate to please and seek validation from others. Women turn a cold shoulder to us, not because they are rejecting sex. They are rejecting the neediness.

When we take care of ourselves, we become more generous and  more judicious givers. Healthy giving is not giving to get, it’s a measured response.

Mentioned Episodes: No More Mr. Nice Guy with Dr. Robert Glover


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Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Dr. Robert Glover’s Links

Website

Facebook

Twitter


Create an Epic Life

join The Dad Edge Alliance

CLICK HERE!

Dad Edge Alliance

no more mr. nice guy

No More Mr. Nice Guy with Dr. Robert Glover

Why are we not getting our needs met when we seem to be going out of our way for everyone? Dr. Robert Glover talks to us today about Nice Guy Syndrome and why it’s actually not so nice for you and for those around you. This show will change everything you thought you knew about being Mr. Nice Guy.

Dr. Robert Glover

Dr. Robert Glover, author of No More Mr. Nice Guy: A Proven Plan For Getting What You Want in Love, Sex and Life.

Dr. Glover is an internationally recognized authority on the Nice Guy Syndrome. He is a frequent guest on radio talk shows and has been featured in numerous local and national publications.

Through his book, online classes, workshops, podcasts, blogs, consultation, and therapy groups, Dr. Glover has helped change the lives of countless men and women around the world.

As a result of his work, Dr. Glover has helped thousands of Nice Guys transform from being passive, resentful victims to empowered, integrated males. Along with these personal changes have come similar transformations in these men’s professional careers and intimate relationships.

Nice Guy Syndrome

Dr. Glover started discovering the dynamic of Nice Guy Syndrome in his thirties. He was in an unhappy marriage and couldn’t figure out what was wrong. He was doing everything to try to make his wife happy and avoid conflict. Somehow, no matter what he did it was never good enough. She was moody and had lost all interest in sex. Dr. Glover was bewildered why being a nice guy wasn’t working.

The problem was that being a nice guy on the outside made him hold in his frustrations. He became resentful and passive aggressive. His wife actually told him she’d rather be with an outright asshole than to be with him. He wanted to stay married so he went to support groups and therapy and began to understand what had happened to him.

A key piece to the development of Dr. Glover’s Nice Guy Syndrome was his childhood. He and his father were close and spent lots of time together, but there was one problem–his father was extremely moody. He would get angry for no reason and stay that way for weeks. Dr. Glover was determined not to be like his dad. He wanted to be different from all the jerks that women complained about. He would be the nice guy and women would desire him because of that.

Core of Nice Guy Syndrome

Nice guys live by three covert contracts. The problem is, no one knows they are operating by these unspoken rules.

  1. If I’m a good guy, I will be liked and loved (and women will desire me).
  2. If I meet other people’s needs without them having to ask, they will meet my needs without me having to ask.
  3. If I do everything right, I’ll have a smooth problem free life.

When nice guys don’t get the results they hoped for, they don’t give up. They tend to double-down and try harder. That’s when they need to look outside for help.

Some Nice Guy Traits

  • seek the approval of others.
  • hide their perceived flaws and mistakes.
  • put other people’s needs and wants before their own.
  • sacrifice their personal power and play the role of a victim.
  • tend to be disconnected from other men and from their own masculine energy.

How to Reclaim Your Personal Power

  1. Don’t try to do it alone.
  2. Don’t try to do it with your intimate partner.
  3. Find a safe person or safe place (friend, therapist, coach, mentor, support group).
  4. Practice talking about things you’ve hidden about yourself.
  5. Keep connected with a tribe.

 


give KIND a try

GDP exclusive

10 snack variety pack plus a monthly snack subscription

Visit kindsnacks.com/gooddad


Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Dr. Robert Glover’s Links

Website

Facebook

Twitter

 


Create an Epic Life

join The Dad Edge Alliance

CLICK HERE!

Dad Edge Alliance

Process to Build Unshakable Confidence

The 4-Step Process to Build Unshakable Confidence

In this episode of Thursday Throwdown, I’m going to share with you some very powerful information from former Navy SEAL Larry Yatch and outline his 4-step process to build unshakable confidence in every aspect of your life. You don’t want to miss this short, simple, yet life-changing podcast.

Mentioned Episodes:

How to Break the Cycle of the Fixed Mindset with Larry Yatch

How to Instill the Growth Mindset in Your Kids with Larry Yatch

Secrets of the Navy SEAL Mindset: Courage, Confidence, Perseverance and Resilience

Reversing Generations of Bad Parenting with 6-Time Muay Thai Champion Chris Romulo


SEALed Mindset Exclusive GDP Offer


Get access to the SEALed Mindset Membership Platform

Normal price: $150-$250 a month

DISCOUNT EXTENDED: $25 a month for GDP listeners (90% lifetime discount)

Extra bonus: For FREE new lesson click here> SMLdad.com

 


Create an Epic Life

join The Dad Edge Alliance

CLICK HERE!

Dad Edge Alliance


Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links