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taking risks for a life of fulfillment

Taking Risks for a Life of Fulfillment

In our last episode, we talked with Sam Weinman about how to win at losing, how to succeed when we fail, and how to learn from defeat. I want to recap on this because the fear of losing is one of the most popular topics discussed in our Dad’s Edge Private Facebook Group. A lot of guys are afraid of taking risks and doing something new. We’re afraid of failing. We hold back because we think we’re not good enough.

But, think about it.

What would life would be like if you took no risks?

What if you always knew what exactly what would happen?

Would you be afraid?

No. You would have certainty. You would know the outcome of every situation in life. Sounds wonderful, doesn’t it?

No, really think about it.

Absolute certainty would be a curse. You would be bored without any challenges or surprises, and life would be unfulfilling.

So start today.

Do something that scares you a little.

In order to live life to the fullest, we must take risks, get our hands dirty, and fail.

 

Referenced Episode: How to Teach Our Kids to Win at Losing with Sam Weinman

 


Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


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Extra bonus: For FREE new lesson click here> SMLdad.com


The #1 Reason Kids Quit Sports is Because of the Coach.

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growth mindset in your kids Larry Yatch

How to Instill the Growth Mindset in Your Kids with Larry Yatch

Larry Yatch from the SEALed Mindset is back to share some mind-blowing insights on how to make our families work as high-functioning teams, how to instill the growth mindset in our kids, and how to persevere and show courage in the face of fear.

The SEALED MINDSET

The Navy SEALs are the most elite warriors on the planet. Larry Yatch and his partner, Eric Davis, worked together as SEALs and they now teach the SEALed Mindset proven performance principles. Larry is experienced with managing high-performing individuals and building high-functioning teams. He believes the most important team you’re on is your family.

What is a team?

SEALs couldn’t do anything without their team. It takes a whole group of people to help them accomplish their goals. When you’re in the SEALs it’s crucial that every team member does their part because your competition is trying to kill you. Imagine if one person slacks off for the day. The consequences could be deadly.

The same holds true in work and family. Whether we are aware of it or not, we are on several teams, in order to be a good team player we must first identify the teams we’re on.

A team must have:

  1. Common background of experience – Team members need to speak the same language so they can communicate.
  2. Common concerns and obligations – Team members must be worried about the same issues, or share issues that nest.
  3. The same future goal – All must want to achieve the desired end-state.

When a member of family doesn’t have one of these 3 things, the family becomes dysfunctional.

How to incorporate teams in family lives?

In a high-functioning team, everyone has to have the same definitions and expectations of the roles on the team. Just like in football and other sports, each player has a specific role. They know what they are supposed to and execute their job to the best of their ability. This allows the other team members to focus on their own duties.

The three functions of members in a family team or spousal unit are leading, managing, following. The leader calls the shots, the manager creates an environment in which the leader can successfully lead, and the followers execute the leader’s plan. This acceptance of team roles helps avoid family conflict and ensures goals are accomplished efficiently.

What is fixed versus growth mindset?

Our subconscious mind processes information exponentially faster than the conscious mind, and our mindset is the filter between conscious and subconscious. If we have a bad mindset, we’ll react to our environment with our ego and in a fearful way. If we have a good mindset, we will respond with confidence, perseverance, and responsibility.

A person with a fixed mindset believes their skills and intelligence are limited, and therefore fear failure and avoid challenges. A person with a growth mindset knows their skills and intelligence can grow as long as they work hard and don’t allow fear hold them back. They rise to challenges, learn from failure, and persevere until they succeed.

The fixed mindset doesn’t have to stay fixed.

The good news is that our mindset is not permanent. It is a habit of thinking and reacting, not a physiological trait. We can change the way we operate. However, if we’ve been using a fixed mindset since our childhood, it will take a long time and a great effort to change.

How can we instill a growth mindset in our kids?

Many of us have unknowingly brought our kids up with the same fixed mindset we were raised with. When kids are told they are good at a sport or smart at a subject, they expect to accomplish everything with ease. When they run into a challenging situation, they feel fear and shame. If the task wasn’t easy for them, they think they are a failure. Their ego can’t handle it. In the future, they will avoid challenges or quit soon after undertaking them to avoid failing again.

Children with a growth mindset are praised for their hard work and effort. Instead of believing they’re simply “good” at something and that there is nothing beyond that, they know that as long as they keep working hard, they can keep getting better. Instead of avoiding difficulties, challenges, and criticism, they turn them into opportunities to learn.

Amazingly, it only takes a changing a few words when you’re praising your children to begin to change the mindset. Stop telling them they are “good” or “smart” and start telling them what a great effort they put in and how courageous they were to try their best in the face of fear and failure.

Stop rewarding the result. Reward the hard work.

 

Referenced Episode: Secrets of the Navy SEAL Mindset: Courage, Confidence, Perseverance and Resilience

 

SEALed Mindset Exclusive GDP Offer


Get access to the SEALed Mindset Membership Platform

Normal price: $150-$250 a month

DISCOUNT EXTENDED: $25 a month for GDP listeners (90% lifetime discount)

Extra bonus: For FREE new lesson click here> SMLdad.com


 

Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


Guest links

Sealed Mindset

Twitter

Facebook


The #1 Reason Kids Quit Sports is Because of the Coach

Secrets of the Navy SEALs mindset - courage, confidence perseverance and resilience

Secrets of the Navy SEAL Mindset: Courage, Confidence, Perseverance and Resilience

In this episode, I talk with retired Navy SEALs, Eric Davis and Larry Yatch, about how we normal dads can apply the Navy SEAL mindset to develop Courage, Confidence, Perseverance and Resilience.

The SEALED MINDSET

The Navy SEALs are the most elite warriors on the planet. Eric Davis and Larry Yatch worked together as SEALs and known each other over 16 years. They now teach the SEALed Mindset proven performance principles and will share some amazing tactics and formulas so we can become better men and open ourselves up to greater opportunity in life.

Eric Davis

Eric Davis served our country as a U.S. Navy SEAL and decorated veteran of the Global War on Terror. Eric has been recognized as one of the premier sniper instructors in the U.S. military and has served as a Master Training Specialist at the SEAL sniper school in Coronado, CA. Since departing from the SEAL teams, Eric has worked in corporate performance, sales and leadership training bringing an unprecedented amount of innovation, efficiency and structure to the domain of business and personal performance. Eric is the author of “Raising Men: Lessons Navy SEALs learned from their training and taught to their sons”.

Larry Yatch

Larry was determined to follow a path to the military elite ever since 3rd grade when he first saw Top Gun. He eventually spent 10 years as an officer in the Navy SEAL teams after graduating with an engineering degree from the United States Naval Academy. His service to our country ended when Larry was critically injured in the line of duty and medically retired from the Navy SEALs. Larry is experienced with managing high-performing individuals and building high-functioning teams. He believes the most important team you’re on is your family

Fear

Navy SEAls routinely execute missions in life or death scenarios. They don’t have the luxury of giving into fear. If they’re not successful, they are dead. Our modern life situations are not so critical, but managing fear and self-doubt can mean the life or death of your dreams for you and your family.

We men always question ourselves. In stressful or uncertain situations, we go to our default emotions and make decisions based on fear. If we can know how to build confidence and overcome fear, not only can we learn to become more and more confident and resilient, we can give our children the tools to do the same.

Courage

The common understanding of courage is to be fearless enough to do something crazy, like jump out of a plane. However, Larry Yatch explains that courage is not an absence of fear. Courage only exists in the face of fear. Most of us feel fear is a negative emotion, that being scared means we are weak, but we can think of fear as an opportunity to show courage and gain confidence. Fear is simply a cue to exercise an action.

Confidence

Confidence is developed when we repeatedly exercise courage to conquer fear. It’s not born, it builds like a muscle and gets stronger every time we believe we can do something we’ve never done before. Our confidence multiplies each time we learn, practice, and gain experience.

Perseverance

We can also teach ourselves perseverance. The more we learn how to regulate our mental, emotional, and physical reactions, the more resistant we are to giving up, and purpose and passion can drive us to accomplish anything.

Resilience

Courage, confidence, and perseverance make us more resilient. Knowing we have the ability to exercise courage, move forward despite fear, draw upon our confidence, and persevere, no matter the obstacle, the more mentally, emotionally, and physically resilient we are to the challenges in life.

The SEALed Mindset and Parenting

Eric Davis and Larry Yatch created a simple toolbox for men and fathers to gain control over fear and become empowered by reacting with science and strategy. Learning how to lead, follow, and manage the family you’re in is critical to your success in life. None of us gets handed instructions when we have kids. The SEALed Mindset is a manual on how to build effective character, not only to be effective yourself, but to be a reliable leader to your family and a father your kids can depend on to help them turn fearful situations into building moments.

SEALed Mindset Exclusive GDP Offer


Get access to the SEALed Mindset Membership Platform.

Normal price: $150-$250 a month

$25 a month for GDP listeners (90% lifetime discount)

Extra bonus: For FREE first lesson click here> SMLdad.com

 


Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


Guest links

Sealed Mindset

Twitter

Facebook

Raising Men: Lessons Navy SEALs Learned from Their Training and Taught to Their Sons by Eric Davis on Amazon


 

 

eliminate negative emotions

How to Eliminate Negative Emotions by Targeting False Thoughts


Our thoughts and emotions can tear us down if we don’t know how to manage them. When waves of stress repeatedly hit us, our emotions can override our brains and take over our behavior, leading us to perform badly and make poor decisions. We may experience overwhelm or feel like our life is spinning out of control.

In this quick episode, I discuss the difference between an emotion and a thought, and how we can use the dynamic between emotions and thoughts to eliminate unnecessary stress, depression, anger, and overwhelm.


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RESOURCES

Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Check out our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Check out a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


 

core-values-mike-merriam

How Defining Your Core Values Can Ignite Your Personal Evolution with Mike Merriam

If we don’t know our purpose, our core values, and our why, we can walk through the world lost. Today Mike Merriam, author of bestselling book, Closer Than You Think, shares his method of uncovering your core values to go from a life of frustration and defeat to a life full of success and fulfillment.

Mike Merriam’s Story

Through his books, keynote speaking, leadership training, and whole-system Appreciative Inquiry Summits, Mike teaches people and entire systems of people in a company or community how to create the foundation and the framework to develop new configurations of strengths, talents, wisdom, experiences, and perspectives that render their weaknesses irrelevant. Inspired by the abundance of research and breakthroughs in Systems Thinking, Positive Psychology, Emotional Intelligence, Design Thinking, Neuroscience, and Biomimicry, and guided by the Appreciative Inquiry 4-D Cycle and Positive Core Mapping, Mike teaches how to create a flourishing cycle of inquiry and innovation in all aspects of your organization, your community, or just simply, in yourself.

Mike Merriam’s story is rooted in mediocrity. He never had a stand-out skill or strength. He graduated at the bottom of his class and went on to community college where he received a C-/D average. He still wanted to attend a University, but they wouldn’t accept him because his grades were so bad, his credits wouldn’t even transfer. Mike refused to take no for an answer and called the Dean and convinced the Dean to meet with him. He sat with the Dean for three hours until he not only convinced the Dean to accept him as a student, but to also accept all the credits from community college. It was then he finally executed his strength- his ability to communicate and influence people.

He went another ten years not fully aware of his talent and not knowing how to apply it. He stumbled into the mortgage business and spent the next 16 years closing sales. He climbed from loan officer to regional VP, and enjoyed a substantial income and a comfortable life with his wife and two twin boys.

Then, just weeks ago, Mike Merriam’s position was eliminated during a corporate merger.

For the first time, his confidence was rattled and he began to have doubts about his self-image. His family was going through it too and he wondered if he should just go get another job to provide the income needed to maintain their lifestyle.

But he did not go and look for another unfulfilling job. Instead, has taken a situation which feels like a disaster and is using it as an opportunity to go after his dreams.

Now Mike Merriam takes what he has learned and formed it into a digestible framework so others can apply the same concepts to their lives. In addition to his coaching and speaking services, he has just released Closer Than You Think. This book outlines 6 fundamental questions that will ignite your personal evolution and help you bridge the gap between what you are doing now and what you are capable of doing. By mapping your positive core values, identifying your strengths, envisioning a radical transformative future, focusing on priorities, and other exercises, Mike tells us how husbands and fathers can align all these aspects to achieve success, fulfillment and happiness.

On his fatherhood journey…

As the father of two eight-year-old twin boys with completely different personalities, Mike says the most humbling part of his fatherhood journey is coming to the realizations that you can’t truly guide or mold another person into who you want them to be. You can only provide them with unconditional love and support.

Biggest lesson he’s learned as a husband…

Mike says that we tend to want to coach our wives, but he says that coaching without permission is criticism. It’s not good for the relationships, and husbands shouldn’t do it. It’s more important to simply listen.

Mike Merriam’s most valuable piece of Dad Wisdom…

As a father, it’s important not to be wrapped up in outcomes. Don’t worry if your kids are not doing things that you think they should be doing according to your construct of the world. You can’t control them completely. You must let them express themselves, and you must be there as the rock with the dialogue to support learning through their experiences in life.

 

Referenced in this episode: How to Unlock ADHD Superpowers with Peter Shankman


Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Mike Merriam’s Links

Website

Facebook

Twitter

Closer Than You Think on Amazon