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better man

How Your Tribe Will Make You a Better Man with Ryan Michler

Ryan Michler is the creator of the Order of Man Community and Podcast, which teaches men how to live with purpose, achieve self-mastery, and create a legacy. Today he tells why it’s important for men to become part of a tribe and how that tribe will help you become a better man.

Ryan Michler and the Order of Man

Ryan Michler’s father left when he was three-years-old. His first step dad was an alcoholic, and though he wasn’t abusive, he was not present as a parent. His second stepfather was successful, but emotionally abusive, controlling, and manipulative. Still, Ryan didn’t didn’t know what a good dad was supposed to be, so he didn’t know what he was missing. It wasn’t until high school when he saw how his friends’ dads’ behaved that he became aware of the void in his life.

This lack of a father caused Ryan to suffer from a lack of confidence and self-esteem issues. He wanted to be liked and accepted by everyone and changed himself to fit in. After his first marriage failed, he endured the darkest time of his life. He knew he wasn’t operating like a man should. This convinced him to go to work on improving himself.

Now Ryan Michler has been married for twelve years and is a father of four kids. As a dad who grew up without a true father figure, he saw a huge need for learning about what it means to be a man. He started Order of Man to form a tribe of men who can learn from each other and support one another.

Why do men need a tribe?

Women are there for us in a nurturing way, but sometimes we tough love and the insights of other men who have gone what we’ve gone through. Men get emotionally attached to their situations and decisions, it’s difficult to look at our own problems objectively. We need a third-party perspective to give us advice when our thoughts and feelings are clouding our judgement.

How does a tribe work?

Men are raised to be self-reliant and wary of people. We hate to expose our weaknesses or admit when we’re not on top of everything. A tribe is a safe place to share fears and worries about subjects we don’t normally talk about. When we’re going through a time of uncertainty and weakness, we can turn to those with the qualities we’re lacking and learn from them. When we’re feeling strong in life, we can help others by sharing how we’ve overcome a similar experience.

How do we find a tribe?

Operating in packs is how men thrive. To be strong, we need to tie into other people, but it’s up to us to seek out a tribe and be consistent. Ryan suggest dipping your toe in the water. Look at your immediate circle. Who is doing well in areas you’re struggling with? Ask for advice where you see strength in others. Share something light and then build on that. You can also start by joining an online tribe like Order of Man and The Good Dad Project.

Ryan Michler’s Parting Piece of Dad Wisdom

Don’t ever use your kids and family as an excuse not to take care of yourself.

This sounds selfish at first, but it’s actually the most unselfish thing you can do. If you’re constantly draining yourself, you won’t have the mental or physical energy to be a good dad or husband. Begin burned out all the time will build resentment and put a strain on your marriage.

Ryan recommends carving out a time to get together with other men doings something you enjoy. Schedule it in advance. Communicate it to your wife and family so they are in on it you won’t feel guilty about taking time for yourself. He also says it won’t work if you just go through the motions. Give your attention fully to the activity so you’re invigorated and mentally restored when you come home. Then you’ll have refilled your tank so you can serve others again.


RESOURCES

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Connect with Ryan Michler

Website:

orderofman.com

Podcast:

Order of Man

Social Media:

Facebook

Twitter

Instagram

YouTube

 

jim sheils

How to Magnify Your Presence with Your Kids with Jim Sheils

What if you treated your kids with the same respect as you would your biggest business client or investor?

Jim Sheils is a real estate investor and the author of The Family Board Meeting: Is Business Success Hurting Your Family? He is also the founder of Board Meetings International, which offers retreats and online tools to help busy professionals and entrepreneurs forge lasting bonds with their kids.

The tradition started when he and his co-founder, Brian Scrone, got together to surf with friends and joked it was a “board” meeting. Soon it became clear that these trips were about more than just surfing. The camaraderie and support of their surf tribe soon became their deepest source of strength and wisdom. Soon, many of them began to bring their kids along.

As Jim traveled the world for entrepreneurial events, he noticed that many professionals were having a difficult time being successful while maintaining a connection with their families. Even before he became a father, Jim decided to help business owners and professionals make groundbreaking improvements in their relationships with their kids and developed the system he will share in this episode!

What is a board meeting?

A family board meeting is a pre-scheduled 4-hour minimum chunk of time spent with your child every 90 days.

Why every 90 days?

A 90-day period is enough space for deepening and reflection, and it gives ample time for anticipation to build for the next board meeting.

Rules of the board meeting.

  • It must be scheduled like an official meeting that cannot be pushed aside. This ensures you will be consistent and your child knows that they are your highest priority.
  • It must be one-on-one. Being alone with your child with magnify your presence. This time spent together goes much further than the chaos of the whole family being together.
  • Electronics are forbidden. Electronics help us in many ways, but in this instance, they will hurt us by pulling us out of the moment. It will feel awkward at first, but you must disconnect to reconnect.
  • Let your child chose the activity. Allow your kid to design the day. Don’t drag them to something they don’t enjoy.

Jim Sheils recommends ending the day with a focused reflection Ask your kid what he or she liked about the day. Let them talk as much or as little as they want. When you set up time with your child in this format, they remember it clearly, and these special moments become pillars in the relationships.

Jim Sheils’s parting piece of dad wisdom.

Most dads are driven to succeed and provide for their families. We go so fast that we sometimes lose track of the people we love along the way. Is it possible to achieve a balance between family and business?

Jim Sheils always thinks of a simple line Sonny Corleone says in The Godfather. When it comes to choosing between business or family, “I guess business is going to have to suffer.” It doesn’t mean you give up on your business, it just means you put it in its place, and Jim has noticed that he actually performs better and makes better decisions when he keeps focused on what’s most important to him.

 

RESOURCES

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

 

Connect with Jim Sheils

Websites:

Facebook Group

Facebook Page

how to love a spouse with cancer

How to Love a Spouse with Cancer with Gene Villeneuve

Gene Villeneuve shares his experience with the very difficult subject.

Today on the Good Dad Project, we have Gene Villeneuve, a successful business man who lives in Paris with his wife and two daughters. Last year, his wife was diagnosed with breast cancer and they have endured 11 months of emotional exhaustion as she has undergone treatment.

It’s more than likely we’ll all watch one of our loved ones facing a deadly illness during our lives. Gene talks about dealing with the pain and uncertainty of watching a spouse go through cancer treatment while keeping his career in balance and still being a good dad to his kids.

Three things he said were crucial to helping him know how to love a spouse with cancer.

1. Create a community of support.

Husbands of cancer patients tend to feel isolated and alone, but you will also need help. Just because you’re not the one with cancer, doesn’t mean you don’t need support.

2. Put your own oxygen mask on first.

Self-care might feel selfish during this time, but if you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t be strong for your family. Exercise, good rest, and downtime are needed to restore your mental and physical reserves.

3. Listen to what your spouse needs.

As men, we might have a tendency to worry about filling in the practical gaps, like the keeping up with dirty laundry or washing the dishes in the sink. But in reality, a spouse with cancer is frightened and worried. They need to express themselves, and you need to listen to them on deeper level. Then you can love them in the way they need to be loved during this time.

Gene says he now loves his wife more than ever. He says facing a situation like this makes us realize the things we may have taken for granted. We must ask ourselves, what are the things most important to us? What can we do to show that appreciation?

RESOURCES

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Get a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Gene Villeneuve’s website – BusinessHealthResults.com

Facebook

Twitter

Instagram

GENE AKA "JOHNNY DEPP" :)

GENE AKA “JOHNNY DEPP” 🙂

will it fly with pat flynn

Will It Fly with Pat Flynn

Will It Fly with Pat Flynn

Larry and Shawn interview Pat Flynn, founder of Smart Passive Income and author of Will It Fly. In this episode, Pat shares his dynamic story of ground-up success and balancing an entrepreneurship with family.

Key Takeaways:

The intro of Will it Fly with Pat Flynn…We’ve all done it-taken a plain piece of paper, folded it into what we believe will be an aerodynamic masterpiece, only to watch our paper dream nose-dive to the floor. Why? Why would our paper airplane be any different from the other guy’s which looked eerily similar, yet flew like an F-15 Fighter jet? Well, maybe we simply needed a bit more direct guidance. Pat Flynn likens this scenario to entrepreneurship: we see one guy making bank over a great internet idea; we think it looks simple enough, buy business cards, get a great website going and boom. Fail. Why? Maybe that idea worked for that other guy because it worked for them; it fit their values, and it helped them look inward.

Pat states that in work, you don’t need to trade time for money; it’s more trading value for money. For instance, if you provide a service, product or idea online that makes other people’s lives easier or better, you can literally work mere hours in a work week, wake up and see exponential money in your account. Of course, this only works if the idea, product or service is something you believe in and others will need. You need to identify your “why”. Why do you want to create this product, service or idea?

Then, once you’ve got that great product and it’s time to market it and get your business up and running, you have to balance your family and home life as well. Schedule your work around your life, not your life around your work.  This means building entrepreneurial boundaries. In other words, make your own set hours, stick to them and “check-in” to your family and other core values. This way, you are able to focus 100% on what is directly at hand.

So, maybe your first attempt with the paper airplane didn’t fare so well. But, in your second attempt, you got guidance, you decided what you wanted the airplane to look like and it was a total success.

Free Resources:

Check out a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

The Dads Edge Book

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Check out this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Pat Flynn Links:

If you enjoyed this episode, Will It Fly with Pat Flynn, let us know. Leave your comments below as we would love to hear your thoughts so we can continue to provide you with content you enjoy.