Podcast Episodes

peter sacco

Uncovering the Truth About Anger with Peter Sacco

Most men struggle with anger daily. Our tempers flare at work and at home with our wife and kids. Some of us are like Bruce Banner. Some of us turn into the Incredible Hulk. Canada’s psyche doctor, Peter Andrew Sacco tells us the secrets to where anger comes from, how to manage it, and so much more. You don’t want to skip this mind-blowing episode!

We are full-time workers, dads, and husbands. As men, it’s sometimes hard to control our anger. Discovering what type of temperament we have will help us find better ways to manage our anger, improve our relationships, and set an example for our kids on how to deal with their emotions too.

Peter Sacco

Peter Sacco, author of What’s Your Anger Type? is a psychology professor, a former private practitioner and is a regularly featured guest on television and radio. He is also an award-winning executive producer and has hosted many documentaries on relationships, psychological issues, and children’s issues. Peter Sacco has done extensive work in support groups and in anger management, especially with dads who are abusive towards kids and spouses.

Anger is a normal

Anger is a normal emotion. It’s how we deal with it that can be destructive.

Anger makes a person seem more authoritative and powerful, but the truth is that people with an anger problem actually feel they have no control in their lives. A lot of this aggression comes from unresolved issues in childhood and from shame or rage from being rejected as a kid.

Anger can be addictive

Anger is like a drug. When a person gets incensed, they experience an adrenaline rush. Being angry gives the sensation of dominance and control. It overpowers the fear that lies beneath it and gives a person a sense of power because it’s a stronger emotion than depression.

Is there hope for men with anger issues?

Some men who’ve come from a chaotic childhood feel doomed. They believe they’re broken and can’t be fixed. But Peter Sacco says there is tremendous hope for people with anger issues, but they have to do the work.

“You’ve got to want to be the change in your own life”

How to communicate anger

Just like a soldier who has experienced PTSD, a person with a traumatic or abusive past might cope with unresolved emotions in different destructive ways. Some may use drugs and alcohol, some might vent their rage on certain races, others will withdraw or play the victim.

“Today’s catchers are tomorrow’s pitchers.”

A person who has anger issues will be more likely to take it on one his family. If your relationships fall apart and your work life is full of turmoil, the common denominator is you. It may be time to seek help.

Anger and bullying

Bullied kids lack self-esteem and confidence. They suffer from anxiety and depression. Some overcome it through counseling and become normal. Some cope by learning to be helpless and withdraw. Others develop a superiority complex and become bullies themselves, using aggression, rage, or passive aggression on others.

Why kids are suffering from Anxiety and Depression

Parents spend 2.5 to 6.5 minutes talking to their kids each day. In this small amount of time, the communication is usually corrective or punitive. It’s not at a deep intimate level because parents shy away from intimacy from their kids. ADHD has gone up. Divorce rates have risen. Peter Sacco believes it’s this lack of intimacy that’s more responsible than toxins in the environment or ingredients in food. Communication is the key.

Tips for improving communication with your kids

How to start the conversation.

If you feel uncomfortable speaking with your kids, find a situation where you’re most comfortable. Dinner is the best and most traditional forum for families to talk. Sit at the table. Make your kids accountable. Every day, ask them to give five things they’re grateful for. Then tell them to talk about one or two things they didn’t like. This will open up communication.

 

Don’t start out questions with WHY. “Why” pushes someone in a corner. Be a facilitator, don’t treat kids as miniature adults. Don’t say why was your day bad? Say, if your day could go anyway you wanted, what would that be?

 

Be more creative with questions. Do not be so direct. Maybe some things they’re facing will come out.

 

Make yourself the go-to guy.

Fathers are the breadwinners, and many feel that as long as they provide for their children, they’re doing their job as a parent. Most dads will plan adventures or bond over sports, but these activates focus on the event, not the father/child relationship.

 

Dads should sit down with their kid and ask, “I’m Dad and you’re my child – let me ask you a question. What do I mean to you as a father? How do you see me? The all-knowing problem solver? Nagger? Coach? Disciplinarian? Teacher? How can I be a better dad?”

 

How to talk about bullying. Kids won’t talk about being bullied because they’re afraid their parents will be ashamed of them. If you suspect bullying, don’t think that nothing’s happening and wait for it to go away on its own. It will wreck a child’s self-esteem. It’s crucial for kids to know that bullying happens in all walks of life. There is nothing to be ashamed of and that they can talk to you about it.

 

When Dad’s Get Angry

Even on our best days, our patience will run out. Peter Sacco says that the best way to communicate anger is to tell your kids you’re not feeling well. Tell them you just need a few moments. Instead of making it worse, treat anger like you have an upset stomach or like you’re going to vomit. You don’t want to talk about it. You want to be left alone. You’re not lying by saying you’re not feeling well because anger is a feeling. In a half hour, the emotions pass, and you’ll be in rational mindset to talk.

 

 


Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Peter Sacco’s Links

PeterSacco.com

BullyingisfortheBirds.com

Twitter

Facebook

Prevailing Through the Crucibles of Life

Prevailing Through the Crucibles of Life

We all go through times in our lives when the carpet is pulled from under us. Through no fault of our own, our lives spin out of control. We go through a hell that seems unending. We feel all that’s important to us slipping through our fingers. Today we talk about prevailing over the crucibles of life.

I just went through thirty-three days of horrendous insomnia. I only could get ninety minutes to three hours of sleep a night. I went to the ER twice and was hospitalized for four days. I tried all the meds, and nothing would put me down for more than three hours. I went to bed every night in fear, knowing I wouldn’t be able to sleep. I lost fifteen pounds. My blood pressure and blood sugar went up. As my health deteriorated, I worried about my business, the GDP podcast, and my family. For the first time in my life, I experienced anxiety and depression. I felt like I had no control as a I watched everything that was important to me slipping away.

In this episode I tell you how I got through this crucible in my life and how you can too.

 

Did you catch our previous episode? Reclaiming the Art of Manliness with Brett McKay

 


Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links


Create an Epic Life

join The Dad Edge Alliance

CLICK HERE!

Dad Edge Alliance

Reclaiming the Art of Manliness with Brett McKay

When you hear the word ‘manliness’ what comes to mind? In this modern age, it seems like good old-fashioned manliness has disappeared. Today, Brett McKay from The Art of Manliness is here to tell us what being a great man is truly about.

Brett McKay

Brett McKay is the creator of The Art of Manliness, the largest independent men’s interest magazine on the web. He has been married to his wife Kate since 2005 and has two kids, six-year-old son Gus and three-year-old daughter Scout.

When Brett McKay started out in law school, he noticed that men’s magazines were dominated by articles about sports cars, celebrities, and six-pack abs. There was no content that resonated with him. There was no advice on how to become a great man. Brett decided to fill that void and created The Art of Manliness.

Since then, the blog has exploded in popularity and Brett McKay made the bold decision to quit his corporate job to work on the site full-time. The Art of Manliness now produces a podcast and has published several books. The latest book is called The Illustrated Art of Manliness. It comes out on May 16th and covers six aspects of what it means to be a man.

6 Roles a Man Will Have in Life

As men, we wear many hats and have many responsibilities to our community and our families. We have to develop ourselves in each of these roles to become an honorable, well-rounded, and satisfied man.

  1. Warrior – As warriors, we need to develop tactical skills. We must be aware of threats and take precautions. We take safety for granted. Brett says to treat family like VIPs and we are their security detail.
  2. Gentleman – Be considerate. Dress well. Refine yourself. Not for your ego or for vanity, but to make others feel comfortable so you can be of service to them.
  3. Adventurer –Every man in his life wants to go on adventure. Men are attracted to risk. We like activities that test our mettle in unknown situations. As dads, we have a responsibility to expose kids to adventure too.
  4. Leader – Every guy is going to be a leader at one point or another. As dads, we are the leader of our families. As professionals, we are leaders at work. We need to learn the skills to being an effective leader so we can influence with others, not to be manipulative and opportunistic, but to make others feel comfortable so we can gain their trust.
  5. Family Man – Part of being a dad is having things in order for your family. This means taking care of estate planning, financial planning, and vacation planning. Brett says that much of the time we are busy, but not effective. We must be aware of the difference, and spend our resources and time on the most important, meaningful parts of our lives.
  6. Technician – What’s the correct way to hold a hammer? How does a car engine work? Men should learn craftsman skills to be useful around home to business, not just to save time or money, but to bring meaning to life. Being able to be effective and competent in the world brings great satisfaction.

Brett McKay’s Manly Dad Wisdom

Brett says his biggest challenge as a father is staying patient. Kids will test patience to the max, and his advice to dads is to treat parenting like a video game. When it comes to disciplining our kids, we must keep calm and move on quickly. Why? Most kids crave attention whether it’s positive or negative. As authoritarians, we tend to make a big deal when our kids misbehave. This is counterproductive because we’re giving them the exact attention they’re craving. Brett says to treat these situations like Super Mario Brothers. Acknowledge the misbehavior, give the punishment without getting overly emotional, and just keep starting over again.

“Treat parenting like a video game.”


Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Brett McKay’s Links

ArtofManliness.com

Twitter

Facebook

Instagram

 

DAD EDGE ALLIANCE - Unlock the Secrets to Living an Epic Life

The Dad Edge Alliance – Unlock the Secrets to Living an Epic Life

In the last episode of GDP, we had ultra-successful businessman and life coach Aaron Walker. He explained that he owed 100% of his success to his tribe and the people he surrounded himself with. In this week’s Thursday Throwdown, I will tell you how you can make sure you surround yourself with the right people to become the best husband, father, and man you can be.

It’s seems the older we get, the more closed off we become. Why is that?

I posted this question on the Dad Edge private Facebook group and got tons of answers. It’s harder to make new friends as an adult. Priorities change when we have families, and we feel guilty for taking time away from our spouse and kids to spend time with friends and mentors. We might not want to make ourselves seem vulnerable by asking for advice or help. Even when we become successful, we might feel we can’t relate to anyone anymore. Some of us experience such great failures, we’re embarrassed to talk about them.

Even the guys who are involved with sports and church activities still feel like something is missing.

That is why we have built this tribe where we can talk about anything in an ego-free, judgement-free, arrogance-free environment. This is an brotherhood of likeminded men––those who want to teach and those who want to learn; those who want to inspire and those who want to be inspired. We discuss real things that will make us better, more powerful, and more efficient men so that we can live our lives at full throttle. We can live life together and on purpose.

Welcome to the Dad Edge Alliance, where the elite and the hungry want to interact.

As a Member of the Dad Edge Alliance you will have exclusive access to:

1. Weekly live video community talks on Zoom.

2. Monthly elite guest speakers like:

  • Nell Gibbon Daly – sex, intimacy, communication
  • Todd Stottlemyre, MLB starting pitcher – relentless success
  • Jeff Bouwman – debt elimination and financial planning
  • Navy SEALs – elite mindset training
  • former Pro-football players, fitness coaches, life coaches and more!

3. A library of recorded video conferences.

4. Access to the Dad’s Edge Alliance private Facebook community, free books, and other resources.

 

If you’re hungry to live life differently, this is the place to be.

 

How to Join the Dad’s Edge Alliance

Dad Edge Alliance

Referenced episodeWorking to Live, Not Living to Work with Aaron Walker

Heads up on Monday’s upcoming show – Don’t miss Brett McKay, creator of The Art of Manliness blog.


Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Aaron Walker

Working to Live, Not Living to Work with Aaron Walker

Can we live a life of purpose and still make a living to support our families? Can we do the work that we love and still be profitable? The answer is absolutely YES, and Aaron Walker from View from the Top is here to tell us how.

Aaron Walker

This is Aaron Walker’s second time on the Good Dad Project. You may remember his awesome episode The Ultimate Guide to Work/Life Balance way back in November 2015. For those of you who don’t know, Aaron Walker is a hugely successful businessman and life coach who has inspired many through his leadership, mentorship, and consistent pursuit of excellence. He enjoys helping others and believes experience is a great teacher.

Aaron values his time spent with family and friends. Sharing the past 36 years with his lovely wife Robin has been nothing short of spectacular. His two fantastic daughters and champion son-in-law have given Aaron & Robin five beautiful grandchildren. When time allows, Aaron enjoys hunting, fishing, golf, and is an avid reader.

Aaron Walker grew up in a dirt-poor family. They lived in a $6,500 house, which they eventually lost to bankruptcy when alcoholism took over his father’s life. His parents would fight about drinking, and to this day, Aaron despises alcohol. His mother gave his father an ultimatum: either quit or she and the kids would leave. Aaron said his father loved his family more than drinking. This helped his father to quit and turn the family around. Aaron says his dad was his best friend, and they hunted and fished together every day of his life. Still, Aaron wanted to make more of himself, and he did. He was so successful, he retired three times.

Relationships

Aaron admits that even he gets down and depressed. This is why we all need to have people around to encourage us and help us up. Sometimes we need people to slow us down. Sometimes we need people to speed us up. We need wise counsel. This is why Aaron has been doing mastermind groups for 20 years.

Isolation is the enemy of excellence.

Mindset

Aaron says that being positive is a choice. You can choose to be optimistic about circumstances, or pessimistic. You can lead a life of significance, or a life of ambition. Aaron knows from experience that chasing material things won’t satisfy you like you think it will. What matters most is people.

We work to live, we don’t live to work.

Build Boundaries

Aaron sets strict boundaries to make sure his life stays on track. He doesn’t allow women to connect with him on social media. He doesn’t get into a car or dine alone with women. This is a foolproof way to keep his marriage safe, but these boundaries need to be set in all areas of your life. What do you value the most? What do you wish to protect at all costs?

Whatever those boundaries are for you, set them.

Source of Energy

Joy and enthusiasm come through Aaron’s voice whenever he speaks. Aaron has a deep faith in God and he says he draws his energy from his worship. He reads scripture every day and is highly involved in church activities.

Aaron also suggests the following tips to protect your energy levels:

  • Make time to read.
  • Stop watching news, it’s not healthy.
  • Listen to music, blogs, podcasts, Ted Talks.
  • Choose what you put in your mind.
  • Choose the people you spend time with. Are they positive influences?
  • Choose who your kids are around.
  • Choose the mindset to set yourself free.

Dad Wisdom

One of the most important boundaries we as dads can set is to not allow anything to intrude on our time with our kids. Most dads get home and think they should use that time to send ten more emails, or call five extra clients. Aaron says to turn it off.

Don’t’ squander your kids’ time growing up.

 

Till June 20th Pre-order Aaron Walker’s book

and get two special bonuses!

Click here > viewfromthetop.com/book


Resources

==>NEW!!<== Grab a copy of The Dad’s Edge AUDIOBOOK on iTunes or Audible

GRAB A COPY OF THE DAD’S EDGE HERE

Join our Dad Edge Group on Facebook Request Entry Here

We have new Dad Edge T-Shirts!  Grab one HERE

Download a free chapter from: THE DAD’S EDGE on UNLIMITED PATIENCE HERE

Check out this free resource on: CONNECTION WITH YOUR SPOUSE

Download this free resource on:  CONNECTION WITH YOUR KIDS

Links

Aaron Walker’s Links

View from the Top: Website

Twitter

Facebook